[sodpoodle]

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.

Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.

Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -

to give them a laugh...

[BenLurkin]

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

So is "I don't know".

[bgill]

Some men need the toilet seat up some of the time. Time up vs. time down dictates it should be down. Otherwise, there wouldn’t be toilets in men’s rooms.

[stanne]

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

He got to India just fine

[agere_contra]

These are really, really useful.

Thank you for posting.

[Sans-Culotte]

[wastedyears]

Or just go your own way and you won’t have to deal with any of this for the rest of your life.

[Hoffer Rand]

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

Hubby and I had this agreement when we first married. After he turned 50, he updated it. Now he asks "have I slept since then?" If so, he's not responsible for remembering.

[exDemMom]

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

The toilet seat and lid both go down in my house. We do not want the cats in the toilet.