Posted on 04/27/2016 8:38:18 AM PDT by COUNTrecount
Crisis at the Canadian Border A Prescient Look at the Consequences of a Republican Win in November
The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The Republican Presidential primary campaign is prompting an exodus among left leaning citizens who fear theyll soon be required to hunt, pray, and live according to conservative ideas about the Constitution.
Canadian border farmers say its not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, global warming activists, and green energy proponents crossing their fields at night.
I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn, said Southern Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota . The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didnt have any, he left before I even got a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?
In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. He then installed loudspeakers that blared Rush Limbaugh across the fields, but they just keep coming.
Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into electric cars and drive them across the border where they are simply left to fend for themselves after the battery dies.
A lot of these people are not prepared for our rugged conditions, an Ontario border patrolman said. I found one carload without a single bottle of Perrier drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though, and some kale chips.
When liberals are caught, theyre sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about plans being made to build re-education camps where liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and study the Constitution.
In recent days, liberals have turned to ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half- dozen young vegans in blue-hair wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizens about Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the 50s. If they cant identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we become very suspicious about their age, an official said.
Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage, buying up all the Barbara Streisand c.d.s, and renting all the Michael Moore movies. I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just cant support them, an Ottawa resident said. How many art-history majors does one country need?
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They made the same threat with GWB...but they never follow through.
Lmao
They’ll never stand the weather
Oh darn, empty threats are so disappointing. They’d be right at home with Justin Trudeau.
This is hilarious!
They must return to the US to work
Oh almost forgot , Canada checks Criminal background ,so that will stop 99% of them
Thanks for the morning laugh!
Let’s see...
Canada forbids entry for those who have a drunk driving conviction or a drug related offense.. Also domestic abuse is used to turn away those seeking entry, even to visit.
So of your picture, what, one might be able to lawfully enter Canada?
Sneaking across the border is quite possibly the only method for a whole lot of ‘celebrities’ to visit Canada.
Besides, it won’t happen - their agents don’t really like the competition that would come in the form of massive taxes from the Canadian government.
Add the liberal authors to the list like John Green.
There could be a reverse migration as conservative Canadians try to escape Trudeaustan.
Trump will make America great again. ;)
If that doesn't do it, Canadian taxes will.
You’re very welcome!
Quite good! I’ll have to spread it around.
We can be like Mexico, and give them guides and promises of all the free stuff like “health-care” they will get there.
We can have police drop leftists at control points and tell them to walk across.
bookmark
Because all the anti Trump left big beef is Trump racist... anti Mexican...anti Muslim
so why do the want to move to the great "white" north?. and not Mexico or some Muslim country?
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