Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Frank Conversation Between A Muslim And A Democrat
Found on the web, improved it | Dec 5, 2015 | Derivative work by Laz A. Mataz

Posted on 12/05/2015 4:10:33 AM PST by Lazamataz

MUSLIM: "We did this because our holy texts exhort us to to do it."

DEMOCRAT: "No you didn't."

MUSLIM:"Wait, what? Yes we did..."

DEMOCRAT: "No, this has nothing to do with religion. You guys are just using religion as a front for social and geopolitical reasons."

MUSLIM: "WHAT!? Did you even read our official statement? We give explicit Quranic justification. This is jihad, a holy crusade against pagans, blasphemers, and disbelievers."

DEMOCRAT: "No, this is definitely not a Muslim thing. You guys are not true Muslims, and you defame a great religion by saying so."

MUSLIM: "Huh!? Who are you to tell us we're not true Muslims!? Islam is literally at the core of everything we do, and we have implemented the truest most literal and honest interpretation of its founding texts. It is our very reason for being."

DEMOCRAT: "Nope. We created you. We installed a social and economic system that alienates and disenfranchises you, and that's why you did this. We're sorry."

MUSLIM: "What? Why are you apologizing? We just slaughtered you mercilessly in the streets. We targeted unwitting civilians - disenfranchisement doesn't even enter into it!"

DEMOCRAT: "Easy access to guns is what drives your anger."

MUSLIM: "It's not the guns! We will knife you, hang you, burn you, run you over, and bombs are easy to create in our kitchens! We don't care about the guns! In fact, civilian might actually make it difficult for us!"

DEMOCRAT: "Obviously we need to ban all guns. We need to overturn the Second Amendment."

MUSLIM: "By Allah, you are a motherless tool! The weapon is not the issue! Our Holy Jihad against you is the only thing that is important!"

DEMOCRAT: "Climate Change is the reason you rage against us. We deserve it."

MUSLIM: "WHAT??!? What the hell does Climate Change have to do with this???"

DEMOCRAT: "Because of Climate Change, the oceans will rise by one-tenth of one inch, and that makes you furious...."

MUSLIM: (facepalms)

DEMOCRAT: "You see no future for your children because of Climate Change so you strap bombs on them and send them into shopping malls.

MUSLIM: "NO DAMMIT. It has NOTHING to do with Climate Change or Gun Control or ANYTHING like that! It is because we follow the teachings of the Prophet Mohammad, who tells us to put all unbelievers to the sword! We are commanded by Allah to kill you all!"

DEMOCRAT: "This is all caused by the fact we bullied gays and transgenders in our past. If we hadn't been so mean, and accepted Bruce Jenner for the amazing woman he was all those years, you would not be trying to kill us. Please forgive us."

MUSLIM: "ARE YOU INSANE??? We kill gays the moment we find them! We hang them by their necks any chance we can! Islam hates homosexuality!"

DEMOCRAT: "Listen, it's our fault. We resisted resettling you in our country. We should have given you more welfare and food stamps. We don't blame you for feeling unwelcome and lashing out."

MUSLIM: "Seriously, stop taking credit for this! We worked really hard to pull this off, and we're not going to let you take it away from us."

DEMOCRAT: "No, we nourished your extremism. We accept full blame."

MUSLIM: "OMG, how many people do we have to kill around here to finally get our message across?""

DEMOCRAT: "Gun control will fix this."



TOPICS: Cheese, Moose, Sister; Chit/Chat; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: lazamataz
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-6061-80 ... 121-132 next last
I found a much smaller version of this on the web this morning, and fleshed it out and improved it to cover a lot more territory.
1 posted on 12/05/2015 4:10:33 AM PST by Lazamataz
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Makes me want to grill some pork ribs and clean guns on the picnic table.


2 posted on 12/05/2015 4:12:54 AM PST by humblegunner (NOW with even more AWESOMENESS)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: TheOldLady; Cyber Liberty; CatherineofAragon; melissa_in_ga; Slings and Arrows; ...
The Official Lazamataz Sometimes-Funny, Sometimes-Disturbing Ping List
310 Satisfied Customers!TM


Original graphic by TheOatmeal

3 posted on 12/05/2015 4:15:12 AM PST by Lazamataz ( If they try firearm confiscation or gun registration, I go ballistic.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

This should be posted everywhere. And not just on the web. In newspapers. In magazines. Billboards. On the sides of buildings. In every toilet stall across the nation!!!!

Seriously, great job. I love it!


4 posted on 12/05/2015 4:15:19 AM PST by Velvet_Jones
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
Excellent ....

But the real question....

....would you have?


5 posted on 12/05/2015 4:16:03 AM PST by Vaquero ( Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you. .)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Vaquero

No. I would not hit that.


6 posted on 12/05/2015 4:17:07 AM PST by Lazamataz ( If they try firearm confiscation or gun registration, I go ballistic.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
A good morning bump.

5.56mm

7 posted on 12/05/2015 4:18:54 AM PST by M Kehoe
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Oh I get it. These were Global Warming Warriors. Now the Global Warming movement is tainted by this violence. All Global Warming extremists are violent.

Global Warming extremists should not have guns.

We need to add a few more questions to the background check.
Do you believe in Global Warming?
Are you now or have you ever been a member of an organization that believes in Global Warming, including the Democrat Party?


8 posted on 12/05/2015 4:24:09 AM PST by joshua c (Please dont feed the liberals)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

It’s the anal wart on the nose, isn’t it?

Seriously.....your back and forth between the Bernie Lover and Jihadist says it all.....plain simple common sense tells you and me that is what it is while the lefty scratches his head.

I’ve heard ‘progressives’ tell me this kind of stuff to my face. I smile, even laugh and they don’t get what I’m laughing about. They get very confused which is not a big jump for them.

Good work....I will pass it along to kindred spirits


9 posted on 12/05/2015 4:25:32 AM PST by Vaquero ( Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you. .)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: joshua c
Don't forget the easy access to guns, and the horrible way we have persecuted gays.

#BlackLivesMatter

10 posted on 12/05/2015 4:25:44 AM PST by Lazamataz ( If they try firearm confiscation or gun registration, I go ballistic.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Velvet_Jones; Lazmataz

Send it to Bill O’Reilly and Hannity!


11 posted on 12/05/2015 4:31:02 AM PST by fivecatsandadog ( What strategy? Tell me what your strategy is and I'll tell you if its working". Quinn, "Homeland")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

!!!


12 posted on 12/05/2015 4:32:11 AM PST by fivecatsandadog ( What strategy? Tell me what your strategy is and I'll tell you if its working". Quinn, "Homeland")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: Vaquero
I should have posted this here.
13 posted on 12/05/2015 4:33:38 AM PST by o_1_2_3__ (Obama lied, people died - Holiday Edition)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Bravo!


14 posted on 12/05/2015 4:37:48 AM PST by NonValueAdded (In a Time of Universal Deceit, Telling the Truth Is a Revolutionary Act)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Needs bacon!


15 posted on 12/05/2015 4:37:57 AM PST by glock rocks (I don't always talk to liberals, but when I do, I order the large fries.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

America must be punished and destroyed for all its wrongs. There must be equal outcomes for all individuals and nations. America - evil, white, racist greedy, Christian. You just can’t get more evil and backward than Christian. In fact, it is the very idea of nations that the left, in all its forms, are against (along with being against God Himself - you know, the God Almighty of that sick book the Bible!). Its goal is one big Uber world government that controls everything and everybody. Of course, this is all for your good and these our betters know what is best for you so, Shut up and take your medicine or get your head cut off or sent for “reeducation” in a paradise like N. Korea!

It’s past time to wake up. Will we really have another election? It’s a fair question. Another fair question, though not so popular - Is what is happening to America God’s judgement on our nation for rejecting him and his offer of salvation? Go read Romans 1 starting with verse 18 if you are brave enough (or scared enough) to see the truth of our situation.


16 posted on 12/05/2015 4:41:15 AM PST by Lake Living
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: humblegunner

“Makes me want to grill some pork ribs and clean guns on the picnic table..”

I thought you did that EVERY Saturday, Humble! :)


17 posted on 12/05/2015 4:44:45 AM PST by momtothree
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Might add this -
Democrat: And we owe you billions and billions in reparations.


18 posted on 12/05/2015 4:45:22 AM PST by locountry1dr (Political correctness kills)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

19 posted on 12/05/2015 4:46:32 AM PST by moovova
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
Here's the point many miss Laz:

The Christian Bible (New Testament) doesn't have a single reference to committing violence against others for not believing in our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

The Qu'ran has DOZENS of references instructing muslims to kill, behead, lie to/deceive, convert by force if necessary, all non-muslims they come across. Sura 9 "The Verse of the Sword" is an entire book in the qu'ran and is the war manual for muslims.

Democrats accuse Christians and others (Tea Party members, all non-democrats of faith etc..) of committing acts of violence in the name of God, and say the Christian Bible is "violent."

These same Democrats as you point out, completely IGNORE all references to violence and killing in the name of "allah" in the qu'ran.

I don't know we need ANY more proof that Democrats are in direct collusion with muslims in a war on Christians and a war on Jesus Christ.

They've removed God and all references to Him from the public square, and now they blame God for not stopping what they "perceive" as a gun problem.

Democrats, you cannot ask God for help when you've explicitly denounced him and kicked him out of the Government, Schools, Courts, and every other visible place you could find, including His own church by trying to ram "gay marriage" down the country's throat!.

Well, you can ask Him for help but you cannot be surprised when He turns a deaf ear to you.

I haven't seen / heard anyone make this point yet. Rush Limbaugh came close yesterday, but even he missed it based on the 90 minutes of his show that I was able to listen to yesterday.

20 posted on 12/05/2015 4:49:39 AM PST by usconservative (When The Ballot Box No Longer Counts, The Ammunition Box Does. (What's In Your Ammo Box?))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-6061-80 ... 121-132 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson