Posted on 12/01/2015 4:54:35 AM PST by Gamecock
Seems to me that wearing clothes that fit properly might alleviate the “muffin-top” effect. Instead, women are stuffing their zaftig selves into jeans that are 3 sizes too small, with unsightly results.
Let’s see: strip club, Myrtle Beach, plus Florida and police involvement. Oh kaaay.
Um, dude, the name of the place was Derriere.
Did you really expect petite?
I’ve done similar to some ugly girl in Reno a few years back,, didnt get kicked out though...
good times
He got off easy, in ‘64 I was in a bar in France with a bunch of other sailors when a girl stood up with a beer bottle in her hand and said to the sailor next to her in a very loud voice, “That’s what your sister charges!” She then broke the beer bottle over his head, I wondered as it shattered if it was real because he didn’t blink an eye. He slowly stood up straight, he was rail slim and about six feet tall with a thick head of black hair that would have made Elvis turn green with envy. He made a big show out of pulling a comb from his pocket and combing all that hair back into place and then sat back down and ordered another beer.
And she was puching above her weight!
She probably decided that a man with that much nerve could be counted on in a pinch.
Why?
He forgot to mention she was only 4’8” tall.
ROFLOL
“Don’t call me a two bit whore or I’ll hit you with my bag of quarters”
Why can’t guys like this just stay at home and tell their wives to lose weight?
Funny story about this. A guy got hired by a strip club as a short order cook, by an owner who thought that good food, instead of the usual garbage served by strip clubs, would bring in more customers.
So he told his friend about the new job and how if he came to the club he could get a steak dinner cheap. His friend, half famished, showed up hoping to chow down.
However, the girls who danced there are not typically employees, but “independent contractors”, for legal reasons, and they make their real money by doing lap dances, or hopefully by luring customers into a “Champagne Room”, which are still lap dances, but at ten times the price.
When they came to pester the steak eater, he let them know to let him eat in peace first, and then maybe he would go for a lap dance (which he wouldn’t do, being a cheapskate.)
However, halfway through he was interrupted by a very drunken, fat, nude woman. Puzzled because she didn’t look like a stripper, and was completely nude, not wearing a g-string or pasties, he told her he was busy eating, and that she should leave him be.
She was very drunk, and she wasn’t a stripper, but one of those women who go to strip clubs for whatever reason. And she wouldn’t take no for an answer. So she kept getting louder and more obnoxious and in his face, eventually attracting the attention of the bouncer, by sitting on his dinner.
The bouncer refused to believe they weren’t together, so after considerable hubbub, while they looked for the drunk woman’s clothes that had been scattered about, they were both thrown out of the club.
Outside, in the parking lot, she had the gall to ask him to go back to her place. He got in his car and drove off while she screamed at him.
The epilogue is that the cook was fired after one week, good food costing way too much, and diners not wanting lap dances.
Exactly.
Saw a woman a couple of days ago that I swear her pants had to be 4 sizes too small, how the button held I have no idea. She rolled around the top and hung below the belt line all the way around, both my daughter and wife just stopped and stared, I actually laughed out loud.
Wish that I was on ol’ Muffin Top
Down in the Tennessee hills
Ain’t no smoggy smoke on Muffin Top
Ain’t no telephone bills
Once I had a girl on Muffin Top
Half bear, other half cat
Wild as a mink, but sweet as soda pop
I still dream about that
Muffin Top, you’ll always be
Home sweet home to me
Good ol’ Muffin Top
Muffin Top, Tennessee
Muffin Top, Tennessee
Never gentlemanly to mention such a thing - even if it’s true.
Maybe ESPECIALLY if it’s true.
ROFLOL!
Long as there ain’t a “banana-nut” muffin in there.
It is, if she's a midget.
I'm just saying...
He Dindu Muffins
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.