Posted on 08/16/2015 3:43:26 PM PDT by Impala64ssa
While no one likes to receive an unwanted sales call, it’s a pretty inevitable experience shared by many. For some unlucky folks, telemarketing calls are frequent and unrelenting, and it’s not uncommon to fall for financial scams.
Sometimes, all we want is to give those callers a taste of their own medicine — and the harmless yet revengeful conversation below just may be a route you’d like to take. It’s a story that’s been circulating ’round the internet and delighting readers to no end. Here, we meet an old lady who’s so fed up with telemarketers that she decides to have a little fun, and show telemarketers just how frustrating these phone calls can be.
According to the Federal Trade Commission, thousands of people lose money to telephone scams every year. Some seem friendly and are skilled in the art of small talk. They may claim to work for a company you trust, or send mail to convince you to call them. I must admit, this is a rather brilliant way to handle those pesky telemarketers. It’s for the greater good of mankind, people! Do you agree?
Ring, ring, ring...
Her: Hello?
Them: Hello Ma’am, I am calling from A Market Research Company*. Would you be willing to take a short study with us?
Her: Absolutely! We here at Evermoon Consulting are always ready to provide opinion based data to our clients!
Them: Um… Ok? Anyway, the survey just takes about 5 minutes and when finished you are entered into a drawing to win a 3 day vacation to Cancun.
Her: That will not be needed. Our usual remuneration per our standard service agreement is all that is required. However please be aware that our lowest billable period is one hour and this call will be billed for an hour of service even if only five minutes is used.
Them: No Ma’am, this will only take five minutes not an hour.
Her: I understand, however your firm will still be billed the minimum hour as per our services agreements. That comes to $225. How would you like to take care of this today? Do you have billing set up with us already? If so I just need the corporate code for your company.
Them: I don’t have that… This only enters you for a trip.
Her: Ok, that’s alright sir. We can set this up on a company credit card for a small fee. Your new total will be $257.98, sir. Go ahead and give me the credit card number.
Them: What credit card?! We aren’t paying $257 for this!
Her: Oh, you are absolutely right sir! I am so sorry! We are talking after 6pm CDT so you are correct that we are in “premium time”. That is correspondingly higher. You total will be $517.54. Thank you for reminding me!
Them: What?! No… No… We can call you after 6pm. The law says we can call until 9pm.
Her: Evermoon Consulting prides itself on meeting our customers needs 24 hours a day sir, but between 6pm and 6am is premium time. I am ready for that credit card number now, Ma’am.
Them: Look, I just have the calls routed to me. I didn’t call you, a computer did.
Her: Oh, I see.
Them: Yeah, so can we just get to the survey?
Her: Yes, but I will have to add our auto-dialer fee to the charges. It’s due to our consultants time being so valuable that we do this to keep them from having their time wasted. With that fee your new total is $759.99. What are the first four digits of the card you would like us to use, please?
Them: Hold on for my supervisor please.
Her: Ok.
Five minutes later... Five minutes later... Flickr Supervisor: Hello Ma’am, I understand there is a problem?
Her: None at all. Your total charges for one hour of premium time consulting with auto-dialer charge and supervisor level respondent fee with credit card processing is $1163.67. Will this be on a MasterCard, Visa, or American Express today?
Supervisor: For what?!
Her: Consulting on your survey of course. What method of payment will you be using today?
*CLICK*
Would you ever be daring enough to try something like this on a telemarketer?
Unless their intent is to call a business. I get the same 5-10 indian call centers calling me 5-10 times a day calling my office to try and sell something or other.
Used to be programming the phone switch to block "Unknown Caller" would eliminate 90% of the bullshit calls. With phone number spoofing so prevalent I'm down to white listing people who can call me. Even then, that's not 100% because the scum sucking slimy bastards impersonate your own number now too.
I just wish we'd nuke India and their stupid call centers and get it over with.
Maybe you need to get out more. You seem edgy and cranky. Is something missing from your social life? I find it entertaining when someone reacts as you did when someone calls you out on your childish BS.
As a matter of record, I was offering people a chance to buy lake lots for $3000. Those same lake lots, 18 years later were being sold for $125,000 to $200,000. I often think of those who hung up on me and the opportunity they passed on.
Well, I have called solar tele-marketeers thieves because they use tax payer money to subsidize their product. People who install solar on their homes while accepting taxpayer subsidies are thieves too.
It wasn’t me, my Darling. But thank you for the ping.
It’s nice to see you.
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