Well, it’s a stalemate - not even a cold war. Now I am reminded of a story a friend of our told. He was laying carpet or tile - can’t remember which.
An old man and his wife were arguing over some thing to do with the house décor. It was rather obvious that the man usually got his way, and did so again.
However, when he left the room, she looked at our friend and said, It ain’t always going to be that way. One of these days, I’ll be able to do whatever the H*LL I want.
LOL! We all do have our own minds and opinions! I can truly relate to your friend’s story! I think we have to pick our battles, and preserve peace as much as possible. Cycles and opportunities change, and we, imho, need to seek out those opportunities within each cycle.
Right now, I have Darlin, and yes, I find that I often defer - often not very gracefully! ... and I know that Darlin defers to me!... but I know that if I did not have sweet Darlin, while I might have total say-so, it would not be near the fun as if Darlin remained with me. I think that the lady who told that story to your friend had been cognizant of this in some way.
I’d miss Big D like a front tooth! My personal choice is to enjoy this cycle of having the love of my life with me, and to do what I need to do for our mutual happiness. It truly is a very rich opportunity for me! But that’s just me. Everyone has their own challenges and relationship decisions and patterns.