Death of a spouse

Death of a loved one I know it's late. However my husband passed away October 1st. And I'm not coping very well. He had just turned 56 in August. I miss him so very much. Any help would very much be appreciated.

Don't know if it'll help but, here 'ya go.

If death my friend and me divide,

Thou dost not, Lord, my sorrow chide,

Or frown my tears to see;

Restrained from passionate excess,

Thou bidst me mourn in calm distress

For them that rest in Thee.

I feel a strong immortal hope,

Which bears my mournful spirit up

Beneath its mountain load;

Redeemed from death, and grief, and pain,

I soon shall find my friend again

Within the arms of God.

Pass a few fleeting moments more

And death the blessing shall restore

Which death has snatched away;

For me Thou wilt the summons send,

And give me back my parted friend

In that eternal day.

Charles Wesley

I started reading your message and the replies you received from it this morning at 3:30am just before
I got up to start cooking for Christmas at my sister”s house and then getting ready for Christmas Mass.
I've thought about you often during the day today and prayed that your burden was easing thru some of
the wonderful replies, advice and prayers you have been receiving.

God called my husband home on Easter Sunday over 12 years ago at the age of 51. He had just had
a check up the week before, and though he suffered from sleep apnea, had received a clean bill of health.
He was lying next to me and had stopped snoring. This always woke me up, not his snoring, but when he would stop.
I would give him a few seconds and if he didn't start breathing again, I would nudge his shoulder and he would start breathing again.

On April 1, 2002 at a little past midnight, he didn't start breathing again. Despite the CPR efforts of my 20 year old daughter, my
19 year old son and myself, we could not bring him back. We had been married for over 26 years. He was and still is my soul mate.

We have continued with our lives, thanks largely I believe due to our faith and the prayers of our friends and family. Those prayers have
held us together when sadness and grief have pulled at our hearts.

I still miss him something fierce, but I am Catholic and I do believe in the Communion of Saints. His physical presence may be missing,
but his spirit still lives strongly in my heart and my memories. I still catch site of him in our children and now in our grandchildren (which
he was so looking forward to).

I have gone on to start a new job (10 years now) and have made new friends, male and female, but no one has filled the place in my heart that
belongs to Dave. I think he was my one and only in that department.

Everyone is different however. A dear friend of mine lost her husband in similar circumstances about 4 years ago. They had been high school
sweethearts and married right after graduation. She has found happiness in a second marriage just recently. Life does go on.

After Dave passed away, I made a conscious decision to thank God for sending him to me, letting me share his life for 26 years and not begrudge
his being called home. He always belonged to God first and the Lord blessed us with him for longer than some people get to share their time
together.

I know Dave and I will meet again when God calls me, so in the meantime, I keep my heart open to God's plan for me. May God Bless you and help
you over your difficult times.

Merry Christmas!

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