Posted on 10/21/2014 8:06:36 PM PDT by TurboZamboni
MANKATO, Minn. -- Giving a stranger a wet Willy could get you an annoying look, a profanity riddled verbal response or even a punch in the nose.
When that stranger is a police officer on duty, it turns out it's a crime -- one that a Mankato officer thought was more than an extra gross misdemeanor. He responded to the wet pokes to his ears by hauling the perpetrator off to the pokey and requesting a felony charge.
Armed with two freshly licked fingers, a former Kiester man home on leave from the Air Force thought it would be funny to give the officer the Willies. Riley Louis Swearingen, 24, of Goldsboro, N.C., was getting on the "drunk bus" after the downtown bars closed early Saturday when he allegedly licked a finger on each hand and stuck them into the ears of a police sergeant.
The officer was not amused, and Swearingen was immediately arrested, said Cmdr. Jeremy Clifton of the Mankato Department of Public Safety. The sergeant was on the bus talking
(Excerpt) Read more at twincities.com ...
It’s assault.
The worst part was he then put his fingers back in his mouth.
Yes, it’s “assault”. I hope he can sleep with himself knowing he charged a Vet with a felony for giving him a wet willy.
Yeah, but it can squeeze through traffic with ease.
Agree..... this is not the time . Ebola goon kill us all fever is upon us and this jerk is trading spit with strangers . Lucky he didn’t get shot for such silly crap.
Sounds like something Harvey knee slapper would do.
If you have thoughts of murder, mayhem or suicide, consult your physician
Agree. It’s filthy and not a joke.
If that’s a felony assault against a police officer, then it should also be a felony assault against normal citizens. And, oh, by the way, the very badly misnamed “knockout game” is much worse.
If you’re close enough to a cop to give him a double Wet Willy, you’re probably too close.
Next time, give noogies!
A “former Kiester man” who’s on leave from the Air Force??? They gave him leave for turning straight? I guess it’s a whole different military from when I was in.
LOL I had exactly the same thought. You could make up a sort of Wheel of Fortune with all the other possibilities on it and just getting arrested would be the best possible spin.
“Riley used his two wet fingers from Kiester...”
yep...even the blocked off constriction sites.
damned fool! bet he feels like a real big shot now...jerk.
Poison or microbes can easily enter the body through the ears, whether in a large city or small Hamlet.
LOL.
“It’s assault.”
Yes, but would the response be equal had it been a non-badge. Or would they have blown it off as trivial? I think you know the answer to that.
We’re turning real criminals out for lack of room, but we have room for him?
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