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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 01/17/2014 4:53:15 AM PST by Lucky9teen

Well folks, because I've been busy at work, today is going to be a FREE FOR ALL! So have at it...





a quick thought for this morning . . . Obama has his pen and his phone. .Good.........

He can stick his pen up his arse then call someone who cares.









TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: ofst
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To: Conservative4Ever

Go right ahead. I swiped it off Twitchy’s FB feed.


61 posted on 01/17/2014 8:48:37 AM PST by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (I'm not anti-government, government's anti-me.)
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To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers
Hey!

What wrong with sunny side up eggs?

62 posted on 01/17/2014 8:49:05 AM PST by Harmless Teddy Bear (Proud Infidel, Gun Nut, Religious Fanatic and Freedom Fiend)
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To: Twotone

Dancing Guy versus http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XF_rf-b—VQ


63 posted on 01/17/2014 8:49:41 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: fidelis

In the Stones related jokes file...

What is the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scotsman?

Mick Jagger says “Hey, you, get offa my cloud”...

The Scotsman says “Hey, McCloud, get offa my ewe!”


64 posted on 01/17/2014 8:56:36 AM PST by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: the_boy_who_got_lost

Looter guy!


65 posted on 01/17/2014 9:03:40 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Four long-time friends were playing their weekly game of golf, one remarked how nice it would be to wake up on Christmas morning, roll out of bed and without an argument go directly to the golf course, meet his buddies and play a round.

His buddies all chimed in said, “Let’s do it!...We’ll make it a priority; figure out a way and meet here early Christmas morning.”

Months later, that special morning arrives, and there they are on the golf course.

The first guy says, “Boy this game cost me a fortune! I bought my wife a diamond ring that she can’t take her eyes off.”

The second guy says, “I spent a ton too. My wife is at home planning the cruise I gave her. She was up to her eyeballs in brochures.”

The third guy says “Well my wife is at home admiring her new car, reading the manual.”

They all turned to the last guy in the group who is staring at them like they have lost their minds. “I can’t believe you all went to such expense for this golf game. I slapped my wife on the butt and said, ‘Well babe, Merry Christmas!...It’s a great morning — intercourse or golf course?”

She said, “Don’t forget your sweater.”


66 posted on 01/17/2014 9:05:34 AM PST by relentlessly
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To: BenLurkin

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!


67 posted on 01/17/2014 9:12:19 AM PST by Liberty Valance (Keep a simple manner for a happy life :o)
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

Nothing, I suppose, but I prefer mine scrambled.


68 posted on 01/17/2014 10:14:44 AM PST by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (I'm not anti-government, government's anti-me.)
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To: BenLurkin

IS that from SNL? That is soo funny...


69 posted on 01/17/2014 10:54:10 AM PST by Fawn ("My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge" Hosea 4:6)
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To: Girlene

Olde Frothingslosh - Pale, Stale, Ale!

70 posted on 01/17/2014 11:57:00 AM PST by FroggyTheGremlim ("It is not the color of his skin, ... it is the blackness that fills his soul")
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To: Lucky9teen; y'all

Obama, former President George W. Bush, a sweet little old lady and a beautiful blonde with large breasts are on a train.

The train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is the sound of a loud slap.

When the train emerges from the tunnel, Obama has a bright red hand print on his cheek.



No one speaks.

The old lady thinks: Obama must have groped the Blonde in the dark, and she slapped him.

The blonde girl thinks: Obama must have tried to grope me in the dark, but missed and fondled the old lady and she slapped him.

Obama thinks: Bush must have groped the blonde in the dark. She tried to slap him but missed and got me instead.

George Bush thinks: I cant wait for another tunnel so I can slap the sh!t out of Obama again!




PLEASE Make Your Donation Today!

71 posted on 01/17/2014 12:05:36 PM PST by onyx (Please Support Free Republic - Donate Monthly! If you want on Sarah Palin's Ping List, Let Me know!)
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To: eCSMaster

“Get Some ‘Slosh On Your ‘Stache!”

lol...that’s a real beer?


72 posted on 01/17/2014 12:59:12 PM PST by Girlene (Hey, NSA!)
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To: Lucky9teen

73 posted on 01/17/2014 1:28:29 PM PST by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: martin_fierro

74 posted on 01/17/2014 2:02:09 PM PST by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: Lucky9teen
 photo 30212830_zps33af569c.jpg

 photo 559973_586833671345668_1644687869_n_zps4d13a05c.jpg

75 posted on 01/17/2014 2:54:22 PM PST by dragonblustar (Psalm 37:7)
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To: Lucky9teen

Two buddies, Kevin and Doug, were getting very drunk at a bar when suddenly Doug throws up all over himself. “Oh, no... Now my wife will kill me!” Kevin says, “Don’t worry, pal. Just tuck a twenty in your shirt pocket and tell Angie that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry cleaning bill.”

So they stay for another couple of hours and get even drunker. Eventually Doug stumbles home and his wife starts to give him a tough time.

“You reek of alcohol and you’ve puked all over yourself! My God, you’re disgusting!”

Speaking very carefully so as not to slur his words, Doug says, “Nowainaminit, I can e’splain everythin. Itsh snot wha jewthink. I only had a cupla drrrinks. But thiss other guy got sick on me......he had one too many and he juss koudin hold hizz liquor. He said he’s was berry sorry an’ stuck twentie bucks in my breast pocket for the cleaning bill!”

His wife looks in the shirt pocket and says, “But this is forty bucks...”

“Oh, yeah....... I almos’ fergot. He shhhit in my pants, too.”


76 posted on 01/17/2014 3:44:28 PM PST by ErnBatavia (The 0baMao Experiment: Abject Failure)
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To: AU72

“Ah, Iron City beer. I remember in college I could get a case for 4 bucks.”

We would splurge, go for the extra buck and buy Stegmaier.


77 posted on 01/17/2014 4:24:10 PM PST by EQAndyBuzz ("The GOP fights its own base with far more vigor than it employs in fighting the Dims.")
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To: Monkey Face; Revolting cat!; GeronL
IN!!! YAY!!!

YIN!? What the heck is that supposed to mean? I don't grok pig latin, I guess.

78 posted on 01/17/2014 4:33:06 PM PST by a fool in paradise ("Health care is too important to be left to the government.")
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To: ErnBatavia
LOL.

5.56mm

79 posted on 01/17/2014 4:41:55 PM PST by M Kehoe
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To: Lucky9teen; Daffynition

80 posted on 01/17/2014 4:52:22 PM PST by a fool in paradise ("Health care is too important to be left to the government.")
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