Iowans, hide your sisters!
Aren’t most moose loose?
“Hello?”
“Hello. This is Observer 43 of the Iowa Moose Patrol (IMP) calling in with a spotting report.”
“Go ahead, Observer 43.”
“I just seen a moose.”
“Now, now.....let’s follow protocols. How many mooses did you see?”
“One. At least I think it was one. They kind of all look alike to me.”
“Keep your prejudices to yourself, Observer 43. What was the moose doing?”
“He seemed to be wandering about aimlessly.”
“Oh, a Minnesota moose. Was he wearing any Al Franken decals?”
“Not that I could see.”
“Well, good job, Observer 43. Anything else to report?”
“Yes. I saw four polar bears out by the interstate hitch hiking.”
“Was one of them wearing a blue evening gown?”
“Why.....yes.”
“Jerry! This guy has seen that bear in the evening gown. Sir, whatever you do, do not attempt to stop those bears.”
“What should I do?”
“I don’t know. Ask her to dance.”
“You want me to dance with a polar bear?”
“Hey. It’s Saturday night in rural Iowa. What else is there to do?”
Mooses or is it meece in Iowa? Who knew?