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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***
Posted on 11/22/2013 4:38:26 AM PST by Lucky9teen
Lucille decided to give herself a big treat for her 70th birthday by staying overnight in a really nice hotel.
When she checked out the next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for $250.00. She demanded to know why the charge was so high. "I agree it's a nice hotel, but the rooms aren't worth $250..00 for just an overnight stay - I didn't even have breakfast!"
The clerk told her that $250.00 is the 'standard rate,' and breakfast had been included had she wanted it.
She insisted on speaking to the Manager. The Manager appeared and, forewarned by the desk clerk, announced: "This hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center which are available for use."
"But I didn't use them."
''Well, they are here, and you could have." He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which they were so famous. "We have the best entertainers from the world over performing here."
"But I didn't go to any of those shows...."
"Well, we have them, and you could have."
No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!" and the Manager countered with his standard response.
After several minutes discussion, and with the Manager still unmoved, she decided to pay, wrote a check and gave it to him. The Manager was surprised when he looked at the check. "But Madam, this check is for only $50.00"
"That's correct I charged you $200.00 for sleeping with me."
"But I didn't!"
"Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."
0bama brought in the "best and the brightest" to fix the 0bamacare website!
Top Ten Indicators That Your Employer Has Changed To The 0bamacare Health Care Plan:
(10) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.
(9) Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you enter the trailer park."
(8) The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.
(7) The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.
(6) The only item listed under Preventative Care Coverage is "an apple a day."
(5) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.
(4) "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges," is not a typographical error.
(3) The only expense covered 100% is..."Embalming."
(2) Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.
(1) You ask for Viagra and they give you a Popsicle stick and duct tape.
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: friday; ofst; silliness
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See how well Obama's "fix" for Obamacare is?
To: Lucky9teen
woo hoo.....top five.....
Now....back to bed
2
posted on
11/22/2013 4:41:24 AM PST
by
Yorlik803
( Church/Caboose in 2016)
To: Yorlik803
Top five (what did I win)?
3
posted on
11/22/2013 4:43:17 AM PST
by
Scoutmaster
(I'd rather be at Philmont)
To: Lucky9teen
4
posted on
11/22/2013 4:43:33 AM PST
by
John O
(God Save America (Please))
To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...
Lucky Here...
REPORTING FOR
CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST
I am Sissy the Tinseled Deer Hunter
5
posted on
11/22/2013 4:44:13 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
To: Lucky9teen
Good Friday morning!!! Top Ten!!! =D
To: Lucky9teen
7
posted on
11/22/2013 4:48:14 AM PST
by
Shimmer1
(don 't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference)
To: Lucky9teen
Thanks for the silliness!
After this first week on the job, I could use some.
Y’all be safe out there.
8
posted on
11/22/2013 4:50:08 AM PST
by
Crazy Jim
(There are known unknowns and then there are unknown unknowns. - Donald Rumsfeld)
To: Scoutmaster
you get the weekend off....without pay.
9
posted on
11/22/2013 4:50:11 AM PST
by
Yorlik803
( Church/Caboose in 2016)
To: Lucky9teen; Revolting cat!
Friday? I don't have a job in this here Obamaeconomy.
To: Lucky9teen
Happy, happy, happy!
11
posted on
11/22/2013 4:53:37 AM PST
by
ErnBatavia
(The 0baMao Experiment: Abject Failure)
To: Lucky9teen
12
posted on
11/22/2013 4:59:35 AM PST
by
RandallFlagg
(IRS = Internal Revenge Service)
To: Lucky9teen; GeronL; Daffynition
There is something wrong with your Constitution.
Do not attempt to adjust the discussion. We control the dialogue.
We control the economy.
If we wish to shout racism, we will.
If we wish to shout War On Women, we will.
We can reduce the focus by engaging in personal attacks, or shout, "Look! It's a squirrel!".
For the next two years, sit quietly and we will control all that you see and hear.
You have reached, the Obamacare Limits.
To: Lucky9teen
Nutmeg the Jingling Meth-Head.
14
posted on
11/22/2013 5:03:58 AM PST
by
DuncanWaring
(The Lord uses the good ones; the bad ones use the Lord.)
To: Lucky9teen
Nutmeg the sparkly baby daddy.
15
posted on
11/22/2013 5:10:34 AM PST
by
Travis T. OJustice
(I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look.)
To: Lucky9teen
16
posted on
11/22/2013 5:11:13 AM PST
by
relictele
(Principiis obsta & Finem respice - Resist The Beginnings & Consider The End)
To: Lucky9teen
REPORTING FOR ...
To: Lucky9teen
18
posted on
11/22/2013 5:16:57 AM PST
by
Travis T. OJustice
(I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look.)
To: Lucky9teen
17 Stages To Cooking a Turkey
Go buy a turkey
Take a drink of whisky
Put turkey in the oven
Take another 2 drinks of whisky
Set the degree at 375 ovens
Take 3 more whiskys of drink
Turk the bastey
Whisky another bottle of get
Ponder the meat thermometer
Glass yourself a pour of whisky
Bake the whisky for 4 hours
Take the oven out of the turkey
Floor the turkey up off of the pick
Turk the carvey
Get yourself another scottle of botch
Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey
Bless the dinner and pass out
19
posted on
11/22/2013 5:19:17 AM PST
by
Travis T. OJustice
(I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look.)
To: Lucky9teen
20
posted on
11/22/2013 5:21:02 AM PST
by
Travis T. OJustice
(I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look.)
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