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The Real Reason Couples Have SexTwo New Studies Examine What Motivates Couples to Have Sex
Wall Street Journal ^ | 21 October 2013 | Elizabeth Bernstein

Posted on 10/26/2013 9:39:29 PM PDT by Vigilanteman

For years, Julie Brinton's days have been filled with sippy cups and skinned knees, and the endless push of getting three young children through dinner time, bath time, bedtime. By the time she crawls into bed each night, she has one thing on her mind: zoning out to an hour or so of TV.

But some nights, her husband, Rob, reaches over to rub her shoulders and offer her a back rub. And then Ms. Brinton thinks: "Has it really been three weeks? I guess we should probably have sex."

"I will do it for him," says Ms. Brinton, 34, who lives in Mesa, Ariz.

Mr. Brinton, also 34, appreciates his wife's gesture. "But afterward," he says, "I always feel guilty, that I've been selfish."

Ah, marital sex.

Therapists have long known that couples who have more, and better, sex are happier and more stable.

But new research from the University of Toronto shows that the reasons why partners have sex in the first place also significantly affect marital satisfaction. And a person's motive for making love tonight may make a difference to the health of his or her relationship months from now.

(Excerpt) Read more at online.wsj.com ...


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: couples; relationshops; sex
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It appears that once an article is a week old, the WSJ no longer requires a subscription to access.

There is some interesting stuff here. But the bottom line is that even if you get no pleasure in doing your duty, you should do your duty anyway and eventually pleasure will follow.

1 posted on 10/26/2013 9:39:30 PM PDT by Vigilanteman
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To: Vigilanteman

Phew. Two new studies on something humans have done for multiple millennia. Big shortage of actual love in the mix?


2 posted on 10/26/2013 9:42:51 PM PDT by Olog-hai
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To: Vigilanteman

“Because she has a vagina”

“Because I like D*&(”


3 posted on 10/26/2013 9:44:16 PM PDT by TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig (It is going to be Foot to Ass combat on election day....my foot and a Rat's ass.)
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To: Vigilanteman

Here we stand
World’s apart, hearts broken in two
Sleepless nights
Losing ground
I’m reaching for you

Feelin’ that it’s gone
Can change your mind
If we can’t go on
To survive the tide love divides

*Someday love will find you
Break those chains that bind you
One night will remind you
How we touched and went our separate ways
If he ever hurts you
True love won’t desert you
You know I still love you
Though we touched and went our separate ways

Troubled times
Caught between confusion and pain
Distant eyes
Promises we made were in vain

If you must go, I wish you love
You’ll never walk alone
Take care my love
Miss you love


4 posted on 10/26/2013 9:45:28 PM PDT by Jack Hydrazine (IÂ’m not a Republican, I'm a Conservative! Pubbies haven't been conservative since before T.R.)
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To: Vigilanteman

I think that the bottom line is that a newspaper is trying desperately to get readers and who the heck paid for these studies?


5 posted on 10/26/2013 9:46:28 PM PDT by GeronL
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To: Vigilanteman

Total. Waste. Of. Money.

They’re 34 and going three weeks between events? What?


6 posted on 10/26/2013 9:47:03 PM PDT by lurk
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To: Vigilanteman
But new research from the University of Toronto

Toronto? I guess the US government felt this study was too straight for them when there is money to be spent on gay Mexican prostitutes and voice therapy for trannies.

7 posted on 10/26/2013 9:49:07 PM PDT by KarlInOhio (Everyone get online for Obamacare on 10/1. Overload the system and crash it hard!)
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To: TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig

Yep.


8 posted on 10/26/2013 9:55:21 PM PDT by Lurker (Violence is rarely the answer. But when it is it is the only answer.)
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To: lurk
Zactly. Her ‘events’ are less work.
9 posted on 10/26/2013 9:55:23 PM PDT by deadrock (I am someone else.)
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To: lurk

“They’re 34 and going three weeks between events? What?”

Hey, when I was 34 (just a couple years ago) a few weeks between events was no thing. And we had no kids. We were mainly just wore the Hell out from work. Pin 12-hour days on top of 12-hour days and eventually you just want to decompress and get a good 8-9 hours every so often.


10 posted on 10/26/2013 9:58:13 PM PDT by FAA
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To: Vigilanteman

I remember when I was 34. My wife was so aggressive that it was every other night. The slowdown came when we hit our mid fifties. 3 weeks between intimacy? That’s weird. But then again, they have a TV in the bedroom, a big No No


11 posted on 10/26/2013 10:08:27 PM PDT by realcleanguy
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To: lurk

Three days is unacceptable in our house....and we’re in our 40’s.


12 posted on 10/26/2013 10:09:58 PM PDT by Keeper of the Turf (Fore!!!)
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To: realcleanguy
they have a TV in the bedroom, a big No No

Yep. A bedroom is for two things.

13 posted on 10/26/2013 10:12:24 PM PDT by Jeff Chandler (Obamacare: You can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs.)
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To: Vigilanteman

Fundamental fact of life is that no matter how hot looking a woman may appear, there is no guarantee that she will actually enjoy sex as a carnal pleasure. Many men confuse a woman’s biologically programmed desire to procreate and willingness to copulate as synonymous with liking sex per se. Also to protect and be sure her offspring survive, she may for a while continue to “please” the proximal male. Biology rules.


14 posted on 10/26/2013 10:18:22 PM PDT by allendale
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To: Olog-hai

Study results: People who have sex for positive reasons have better sex lives and relationships. People who have sex for negative reasons have less satisfying sex and relationships.

I hope Canadian taxpayers were charged no more than $0.25 for that piece of brilliance.

Other motivations apply —
Wilt Chamberlain: Get into the Guinness Book of Records
Pamela Anderson: Ka-ching!
George Clooney: Because he can
Bill Clinton: Never got it at home
Your mother & father: Ewww!!
Barack Obama: To keep Michelle from outing him


15 posted on 10/26/2013 10:22:56 PM PDT by twister881
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To: All


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16 posted on 10/26/2013 10:27:49 PM PDT by musicman (Until I see the REAL Long Form Vault BC, he's just "PRES__ENT" Obama = Without "ID")
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To: Jack Hydrazine; Lazmataz

Did Laz write that?


17 posted on 10/26/2013 10:27:52 PM PDT by Paladin2
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To: Vigilanteman

In 51 years, there are only a couple of activities that I like better than sex. Just as thrilling, and last a whole hell of a lot longer.

Speed.

Flying.

Combine the two, and you have a winner.

So, Ouderkirk....you want to go flying in a P-51 Mustang or you want to give the old lady a little pickle tickle?

Answer: What’s the cloud ceiling and visibility?


18 posted on 10/26/2013 10:32:10 PM PDT by Ouderkirk (To the left, everything must evidence that this or that strand of leftist theory is true)
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To: Paladin2

Nope . . . Steve Perry and Jonathan Cain.


19 posted on 10/26/2013 10:32:44 PM PDT by Olog-hai
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To: Olog-hai

What a long strange trip (journey) it’s been.


20 posted on 10/26/2013 10:38:37 PM PDT by Paladin2
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