Today is the Saturday before Easter. I gave up alcohol and meat for Lent, 46 days to be exact, so when I woke up today I was so excited I felt like running outside and rolling around in the grass.
I started my usual Saturday chores like laundry, cleaning the kitchen, living room and bathroom of my bachelor pad with glee and ran my usual Saturday errands like to the bank and the post office. Got a haircut and washed the car.
I thought I'd stop off at the grocery store where they have Sirloin Tip Roasts on sale. I mused about putting a bake potato in the oven today at 110 degrees so it would be ready by noon tomorrow, then prepare the roast with all the trimmings for a fabulous Beef Bourguignon I'd make in my slow cooker. The thought of opening a vintage California Pinot after church tomorrow tickled me. Yes, today was going to be a great day!
Like Gene Kelly in Singing in the Rain, I pranced up and down the aisles of Piggly Wiggly high on life, then docked my grocery cart in the check out line anxious to pay and get home. While I waited behind the customer in front of me, I glanced at the headings of half dozen or so of those worthless tabloids. Just about all of them describing one of the pregnant Kardashians gaining 200lbs, and Tiger's new squeeze giddy about her boyfriend being a sex addict.
I chuckled thinking how pleased I was with myself for never succumbing to reading and believing that stupid trash. Then it hit me like the thought of going to an all night dentist.
There, tucked away in the upper left hand corner of The Globe was the headline PAUL ANKA: I BEDDED ANNETTE
I'm in shock. I'm crushed! How can this be? I walked out to my car like one of the characters in The Living Dead, totally numb. My day is ruined. My life will never be the same. What will I do?
PAUL ANKA?! HOW COULD YOU?!! YOU BEDDED ANNETTE?!!! Under her Mom's nose no less? My first crush?
I won't be posting or reading FR for the next 24 to 48 hours at least. I'm putting on my PJs and boiling a full pot of Chamomile tea then staying in bed until Monday.
Good-bye Cruel World...
I think you could use a little rest. And enjoy the roast. Life will get better when get some iron back in your system....
(Besides, “Annette” was ugly.)
“”Rock ‘n’ roll icon Paul Anka has dropped a bombshell revelation in his new book about his fabulous career - he had a sizzling affair with gorgeous Disney star Annette Funicello
“”
Most people don’t know who either one of them is. The ones who do are too old to care.
Eh? Johnny's Theme, You're Having My Baby, etc.
Diana is one of my favorite songs (somehow) but Paul was never a rocker.
Paul Anka, old guy most do not remember desperately wanting someone to remember, how sad.
If Paul Anka really wrote this, he is a jerk.
Apparently YOU are no Gentleman Paul Anka- what kind of a sleezeballl tells who he screwed, publicly embarrasing them like this?
Are you that desperate to make a few bucks?
Paul Anka’s book should be rather interesting reading.
Well, on the upside, at least he’s not gay.
Keep in mind...this is THE GLOBE!
Gentlemen don’t boast.
Annette sort of reminded me of Haley Mills.
Not really all that pretty but still sort of attractive.
A pathetic excuse for a man. It must be sad to be a washed-up hack whose better days are way behind him. Mr. Anka, you are a fool.
Big deal...so did I.
FMCDH(BITS)
(sigh)
Remember the “good old days” when people had decorum and kept their private business private?
I really miss those days. What classless Paul Anka did in the past should have remained there. America doesn’t need to know this now and Annette doesn’t need or deserve the embarrassment and humiliation.
At least he didn’t bed Cubby!
Now there’s a story that Paul Anka should have taken to the grave. Only a certified a**hole would share such a thing with the public.
“And now Walt Disney presents ‘Annette’ starring Annette as...Annette!”