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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 03/01/2013 4:41:18 AM PST by Lucky9teen

The True Story of Sequestration In Handy GIF Form

We've heard a lot lately about sequestration.

But how did our lawmakers get us to this point?

Let's take a look.

It all started back in 2010 when the Tea Party swept into the House of Representatives. They argued that the stimulus measures –  taken by the Obama administration to lessen the depth of the recession – created too much debt. To reduce this debt they were going to slash government spending...

Now, every so often Congress authorizes how much money the government can borrow. This is called the debt ceiling. Tea partiers rightly claimed that the debt ceiling was too damn high.


"The Debt Ceiling is Too Damn High!"

So they tried to use the debt ceiling as leverage to shrink government services and cut programs like Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid.

After the left took the U.S. economy to the brink of default, the right wing agreed to raise the debt ceiling, but only if they were guaranteed some sort of massive spending cuts.


The Right Wing

And thus the sequester was born.

The sequester was supposed to be so painful that Congress would have to come up with a plan. It was acclaimed by both Democrats and Republicans as a victory of bipartisanship.

So Congress formed a "Super Committee" to pass a “Grand Bargain” that would reduce the deficit by the same amount as the sequester, but with a more balanced mix of cuts and increased revenue.


The super committee

But the Tea Party went like this:

Because the Tea Party held the line, and the Democrats refused to back down from their big government agenda, the Super Committee was not able to agree on a plan. The Tea Party refused to even consider raising any taxes or take from the rich to give to the poor. They believed the best thing to solve the debt problem, was to cut, cut, cut. So the can was kicked down the road until after the election.


It looked like this, but in slow motion.

Time passed. Obama got re-elected and most of America was like this:

The people who voted for the other guy were like this:

Immediately following the election there were two deadlines. The Bush tax cuts were going to expire, raising taxes on most Americans in the middle of a weak economy. At the same time, sequestration was going to kick in, slashing spending indiscriminately. This combination of tax hikes on the middle class and devastating spending cuts was known as the FISCAL CLIFF.


At least the scenery is nice.

Instead of jumping off the fiscal cliff, President Obama and Speaker of the House John Boehner decided it was time for a grand bargain. They would compromise by raising revenue and cutting spending at the same time. Thanks to caving from Progressive Republicans, the grand bargain ended up something like this:

Ultimately, Obama preserved tax cuts for working people but forced the right to raise taxes on many wealthy Americans. The right wasn't happy about it, but some of them voted for it anyway.

Side note: although Obama is taking more money from wealthy Americans, many millionaires and billionaires still ignorantly support him.


Millionaires and billionaires.

After obstructing yet another compromise, Republicans decided the sequester was still a good idea. They would try to use it to force cuts to vital programs. The sequester was postponed until March 1.  Meanwhile, we see the wolves dine with each other, deciding on what to eat for lunch.

Now March 1 is upon us. So the sequester is about to kick in. Obama is traveling the country, claiming the sky is going to fall.

Obama & Co. claim that by letting the automatic spending cuts go into effect the whole of government will be shut down, people will lose jobs everywhere, food will be scarce, police and fire fighters won't be able to protect citizens, medical services will be eviscerated...basically everything that makes the world go around, will come to a halt.


Yeah, it's that messed up.

Meanwhile, most Americans feel like this:

The sequester will eliminate jobs, but they'll be UNION and government jobs.  It's a start in cutting back this over-grown and out-of-control, government.

Meanwhile Obama keeps going on vacation after vacation, on the taxpayer dime.


Partying on some yacht.

Leaving many Americans to feel like this:

"Oh, *hell* no!"


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: ofst
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To: Lucky9teen

41 posted on 03/01/2013 7:13:19 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Pan_Yan

I miss him, too. Perhaps he’s out there someplace...


42 posted on 03/01/2013 7:13:29 AM PST by Old Sarge (We are officially over the precipice, we just havent struck the ground yet...)
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To: ArGee

43 posted on 03/01/2013 7:15:30 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: BenLurkin
I just found this marvelous proof that nothing can ever be proven. It follows:



Oh, wait, nevermind. Well, THAT was a complete waste of time.
44 posted on 03/01/2013 7:28:33 AM PST by ArGee (An open mind is like an open window - if you don't have a screen, you get flies.)
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To: Old Sarge

See tagline.


45 posted on 03/01/2013 7:50:52 AM PST by Slings and Arrows (You can't have IngSoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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Wahoo!!!! First 47. Or 50,000 miles, whichever comes first


46 posted on 03/01/2013 8:10:25 AM PST by llevrok (Keep your arms out. ItÂ’ll make it harder for them to throw a net over you.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Being recently retired, I have time to explore the new “llevrok”. One of those bucket list items is to learn how to play the guitar.

Now, being a bit of a gadget nut, I saw one made here locally that claimed to be always in tune. The store owner and guitar maker is an old German guy, named Leopold Oppornockerty. Mr Oppornockity told me his guitar is guaranteed to be always in tune. Well, even though I am a novice player, I had to have one !

On my second lesson, the guitar instructor told me that I was out of tune. What?!!! So the next day, I went right back to Oppornockity’s music store to complain and hopefully, get my guitar back in tune.

Mr. Oppornockity looked that the guitar and agreed it was out of tune. “So what are you going to do about it?”, I asked. You said the thing was guaranteed to stay in tune. I want you to re-tune it!”, says I. “I’ll not re-tune your guitar. You see,” he said as he showed me the door, “Oppornockity only tunes once!”.


47 posted on 03/01/2013 8:11:17 AM PST by llevrok (Keep your arms out. ItÂ’ll make it harder for them to throw a net over you.)
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To: Lucky9teen

"...you you you stole it"

48 posted on 03/01/2013 8:11:30 AM PST by Doogle (USAF.68-73..8th TFW Ubon Thailand..never store a threat you should have eliminated))
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To: Doogle

49 posted on 03/01/2013 8:14:49 AM PST by Lucky9teen (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
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To: ArGee

Reminds me
I was looking in the attic for something and I found my old Navy uniform.

“I wonder if the pea jacket still fits?”, I wondered. So I tried it on and to my surprise, I was pretty “close”. Wow!.

So I stuck my hands into the pockets and found an old dry cleaner’s reciept. “Naw”, couldn’t be. “I bet it’ been 40 years since I last wore this jacket.

Well, my curiousity got the better of me. I went to the address on the cleaner’s ticket and sure enough, the place was still in business. I went in and told the cleaner the story how I found the ticket.

“Let me tak a look at it”, the old cleaner guy said. After a few seconds, he looked at me and said, “That navy blazer? I remember it. It will be ready after 5 on Tuesday!”


50 posted on 03/01/2013 8:22:11 AM PST by llevrok (Keep your arms out. ItÂ’ll make it harder for them to throw a net over you.)
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To: skinkinthegrass

Clip Clop
Clip Clop
Clip Clop
BANG !!!
Clip Clop..... *

* That’s an Amish drive by shooting


51 posted on 03/01/2013 8:26:07 AM PST by llevrok (Keep your arms out. ItÂ’ll make it harder for them to throw a net over you.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Nor can you have an Animal Farm without Snowball...


52 posted on 03/01/2013 8:28:24 AM PST by Old Sarge (We are officially over the precipice, we just havent struck the ground yet...)
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To: Lucky9teen

Awesome start!


53 posted on 03/01/2013 8:28:41 AM PST by sunny48
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News Story

Woman Stops Grizzly Attack With 25 Cal Pistol

This is a story of self control and marksmanship with an itsy bitsy shooter by a woman against a fierce predator.

What is the smallest caliber you trust to protect yourself?

While out hiking in Alberta Canada with my boyfriend we were surprised by a huge grizzly bear charging at us from out of no where. She must have been protecting her cubs because she was extremely aggressive.

If I had not had my little Beretta Jetfire .25 cal with me I would not be here today! Just one shot to my boyfriend’s knee cap was all it took…….the bear got him and I was able to escape by just walking away at a brisk pace.

It’s one of the best pistols in my collection……...


54 posted on 03/01/2013 8:39:15 AM PST by llevrok (Keep your arms out. ItÂ’ll make it harder for them to throw a net over you.)
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To: BenLurkin

I would love to see the outcome of that.


55 posted on 03/01/2013 8:42:45 AM PST by sunny48
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To: Lucky9teen

Ultimate Dog Tease
http://youtu.be/nGeKSiCQkPw


56 posted on 03/01/2013 8:44:03 AM PST by sunny48
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To: llevrok
Clip Clop
Clip Clop
Clip Clop
BANG !!!
Clip Clop..... *
* That’s an Amish drive by shooting
a bit slow????...
Clip-pertly Clop
Clip-pertly Clop
Clip-pertly Clop
BANG !!!...BANG !!!
(double hit w/good eye :)
Clip-pertly Clop
Clip-pertly Clop
racing...I live in KY

57 posted on 03/01/2013 8:53:37 AM PST by skinkinthegrass (who'll take tomorrow,$pend it all today;who can take your income,tax it all away..0'Blowfly can :-)
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To: Old Sarge

Robert Gibbs agrees.


58 posted on 03/01/2013 9:00:10 AM PST by Slings and Arrows (You can't have IngSoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: SMARTY

Thanks for pointing that out. I was fixed on her eyes.

She has zer0 class. Eats like she’s in the school cafeteria.


59 posted on 03/01/2013 9:01:11 AM PST by Vinnie (A)
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To: Lucky9teen

How Would Dr. Seuss Explain the Sequester?

On Pennsylvania Avenue, right near the end, there lived a President who wanted to spend.

He knew spending meant power, so hour by hour, he thought up more spends from his Washington tower.

“I’ll spend without limits; I’ll spend without blame! Raising taxes to pay—that’s the name of the game.”

Down the street, though, a House filled with thriftier folk had a budget to pass, or the country’d go broke. “We can’t spend all day; we’ve got bills to pay! Let’s keep deficits and higher taxes away.”

The Senate next door to the House just refused. “We don’t like your budget. We’ve got some bad news: The President says we can spend all we want, and we’ll simply raise taxes whenever we choose.”

So they spent and they spent and they borrowed some more. And when all that was spent, they spent same as before.

But not everyone thought the spending was nice. In the House and the Senate, some spenders thought twice. “We’ll cut down on spending. We have a bad feeling…” then—SMACK!—right on schedule, they hit the debt ceiling.

Then the President’s office, confronted with debt: “If it’s cuts they want now, then it’s cuts they shall get. We’ll threaten such cuts that NO one would take, and show them that cuts are not smart to make.”

“This will make Congress move. We’ll just float out a tester… broad, haphazard cuts that we’ll call the sequester.”

The Senate and even the House said, “Okay! That will motivate us to find a good way. We’ll figure this out and stave off those cuts—to allow them to happen, we’d have to be nuts.”

So the deadline was set, but the spending went on. A year and a half had soon come and gone. The House passed a budget; the Senate said no; the President very much enjoyed the show.

“Spend higher! Spend faster! Grow the welfare rolls! Soon, love for the spending will show up in the polls.” He even raised taxes, but it wasn’t enough—the levels of spending grew too fast to keep up.

“Don’t you mind the sequester,” he told Capitol Hill. “You said you would fix it, and I’m sure you will.”

But they could not agree on ways to cut spending, and before they knew it, the sequester was pending.

“Oh no!” they all cried. “We can’t let these cuts stand!”

And the President said, “WHO thought of this terrible plan?”

They didn’t remember his plan all along. He distracted them with his spending-cut song. Now he returned to save them from harm, and to keep them forgetting all but his charm.

So the President said with a glint in his eye, “You tried to cut spending. I saw how you tried. But it’s just too painful—I’m sure you can see. From the beginning, you should have listened to me.”

“I’ll save you all from the spend-cutters’ axes. You see, the solution is just to raise taxes.”

***

We don’t know yet how this story will end. Will Congress raise taxes and continue to spend? We need a balanced budget with smarter cuts—reforming entitlements will take guts.

Let the President know that we’re onto his plan. Share this story with as many people as you can.

 

 


60 posted on 03/01/2013 10:49:27 AM PST by Lady Jag (If you can't make them see the light, let them feel the heat. - Reagan)
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