Posted on 11/11/2012 12:18:55 PM PST by Badabing Badablonde
I confess. I'm horrid at tipping. I dread that moment when that impersonal folder is placed discreetly at my elbow, and I begin the task of checking the bill and scrutinizing the service. I came in for a meal and I still resent the fact that I can't pay for just my meal.
When I was a kid, tipping was different. I remember watching my dad pay the bill, then as we stood to go he would tuck a few bills under a saucer or a salt shaker. When I asked, he explained that our waitress did a good job, paid extra attention to us, made our meal pleasant, and he wanted her to know he appreciated it. That made an impression on me, because it told me that a job well done had its rewards.
Fast forward to today. We are expected to have our meal selections made in a matter of seconds. Hot plates arrive half way thru the salad, and the bill arrives with a convenient line for a diner to indicate the tip amount. Get us in, get the money, get the next party sat.
Because, you see, a tip today is an entitlement. We are expected to pay extra for the basic service. We are not asked if we appreciate the attention. That is assumed. We are grateful to just get service, and maybe if the service was really bad its acceptable to ditch the tip. Waiters assume we will make up for the deficit in their wages. Because, you know, it's just not fair that they don't make the salary that Joe the Stockbroker makes.
I have my share of tipping horror stories. Like the waiter who waited for me outside the ladies room and demanded to know why his tip was below 20%, forgetting that he got half our orders wrong, wrote nothing down, charged us regular price for happy hour drinks, and we had to hunt him down when we needed him. There was the waitress who believed that because I paid in cash she could help herself to my change.
Spare me the argument that its a poor paying tough job, and just agree with me that some endeavors are just a gamble. Do we sit down at the poker table and blame the other players for hand we are dealt? Do we make the dealer take their cards to give us a better hand? Or do we try to make the best of the hand we are dealt? Do we try to make it up with the next hand?
At least in life, we are not forced to fold. We can play as many hands as we can stand, stay in the game as long as we want.
Anyway, I had my lunch today, the waitress performed her job according to her job description, I made no unreasonable demands, and I quietly added 15% to my bill. But deep down I resent her entitlement attitude that I have to pay for her minimum wage choice.
Preparing for Freeper backlash.........
Again, I’m just stating the facts. You’re the one who’s lecturing us while pocketing the leftovers from your cheapskate tips.
I’m seeing some very bad attitudes after this election, people saying they will never give to charity anymore, this stinginess with some waiters.....
I’m very depressed.
Passive voice changes nothing. Here’s a tip: don’t be a waiter.
I’ve been here since 2000, I’ve never notice you before. I’m sure we are all complete jerks here, in our own ways.
But you posted a vanity, complaining about tipping and you knew you’d be in for it, you said it in the initial post.
Then to find out it isn’t even your own money you’re begrudging but your meal allowance...well give me a break.
I guess it is hard to find good food and service on the road, I can sympathize with that. Hubby’s traveled a lot and he always swore by “Friday’s” but I think they’ve deteriorated.
As for the hungarians, they are a cranky crew, but the food is divine. If you are even in NYC search for the hungarian pastry shop up by Columbia University, I have no idea if it is there anymore but that’s where I ate the second best desert ever (the first was my friend’s chocolate mousse, yes you would die for it, gladly).
But I’m sorry I’m sure you have a better paying job than the most of us here who are paying your salary and while we want you to save our taxpayer dollars we don’t want you to do that by going cheap on some waiter or waitress.
What the hell are you smoking? Where are u getting this model crap? Pocketing per diem? I have to prove something to you on a public posting forum?
Jeez, you’re hostile AND boring.
Just stating a fact until you prove to us otherwise.
Yeah, it’s all about finding a scapegoat. It’s Psych 101. There was a big nasty thread about waiters on election day and now this.
This thread is especially comedic given that the original poster is pocketing the difference from her cheapskate tips. She lectures us but we simply laugh at her.
Maybe she’ll be honest with herself and admit that all this is just misplaced venting about the election, but I doubt it.
If she persists we should of course continue to mock her for her hypocrisy.
Don’t worry, when we meet by chance scrounging for potato peels in the cans behind the FEMA camp dining hall, I’ll remind you of this thread and we’ll both have a laugh.
Tips are pooled. If you don’t want to pay for service then you should order take out.
“Pretty much, which is why I have an opinion on this. It’s my job to travel all over the US, stay in hotels, eat in restaurants, and be at the mercy of the service industry. I refuse to be guilted into the entitlement attitude that is degrading our country.”
But you feel entitled to free service.
Your issue with tipping isn’t a question of “entitlement.” It’s your fundamental misunderstanding of economics, the free market, labor regulation, and the restaurant business.
It’s criminal and immoral that restaurants have managed, with their accomplices in politics greased by donations, to exempt themselves from minimum wage and other labor laws that every single other business in this country has to follow.
But that’s the situation. I can’t change it. Neither can you. And I still like to eat in restaurants. Obviously, you do, too.
So as another poster said, you have to uphold your end of the social construct. You have to pay the laborers directly. And if you don’t, you’re a cheapskate. A chiseling cheapskate. Entitlement? Sure. Everyone who works is ENTITLED to be paid. No more and no less.
Either start tipping or start eating at McDonald’s. YOU’RE UNDERMINING THE AMERICAN WAY.
“Well the little hispanic waitresses Wed AM in a FL. hotel were so giddy over their Obama win that I rewarded them with a scribbled educational note and left their tip amount as ‘ZERO’.”
If they don’t make money from you for earned work, they’ll make money from you (by means of the government) for doing nothing. It’s your choice.
There’s an old saying you might want to consider: Better to be silent and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
You are a cheapskate in search of justification. If you don’t like tipping, don’t eat out...
“I’m seeing some very bad attitudes after this election, people saying they will never give to charity anymore, this stinginess with some waiters.....”
It’s sad enough that the bad people are getting worse but when the good people go bad then it’s truly the end of America
Maybe you're just cherry picking what you want.
I NEVER said that a standard tip was a blessing. Nor did I imply that.
In fact, If there is anything that you should have picked up from my post, is that I try to go above and beyond the norm in order to "bless" others.
There are people out there who hold tightly to a 15% tip, which is fine, and the standard tip. They have a little calculator ready to go, to figure the tip, right down to the penny. There are people of the older generation or two, who still believe that 10% is good.
Some people are soooo worried about tipping, that they are concerned about tipping on the pre tax vs post tax.
Remember, I said I'M LAZY. Its EASIER to just look at the bottom number. Thats what I tip on. Works out better for the waitress.
If my standard tip is 20% and my bill is $22.50 that would be $4.50. Remember, I'M LAZY, a $5 bill is much easier to give than $4.50.
When I have a waitress who really is going above and beyond, or at least trying very hard, or maybe just overloaded, I think nothing of throwing an extra $1 or $2, depending on the bill or if its just me. Hey, $1 or $2 EXTRA on top of a 20% tip on a $20-$25 bill can mean the tip is 25%-35%.
2 months ago I was out of town, had dinner at Pizza Hut with some relatives. When I paid the bill, I used my LAZY 20% formula, and rounded the remainder up to the next dollar. The waitress had been very attentive of us, so I added a couple of extra $$. We were still sitting at the table and she caught my eye from across the room and silently thanked me. We continued to sit therefor another half hour to 45 minutes. Though the restaurant was empty and we weren't keeping her from turning another table, I threw a few more $$ on the table.
My 17 year old cousin asked why I threw more money on the table. I explained that we were at the table longer than reasonable, and that it was appropriate to put more of a tip down, because we were stopping her from turning our table and making more tips from others (even though the restaurant was empty).
When I was in my 20's I worked in the restaurant world. I know what waiters and waitresses deal with. Because of that, I go beyond what is expected by societal norms.
Unless a waitress gave me EXTREMELY horrible service, she would never get less than 15%. Otherwise I'm quite sure that most of wait staff would consider me a good tipper and a good customer. Of course there are some who think that life OWES them more, but thats THEIR problem.
Speaking of horrible service. I was at a restaurant one time. The meat dish I ordered came back WAYYYY to under cooked. Enough where I couldn't really eat it. The entire plate was sent back. When it came back, the SAME piece of meat was now OVER cooked, and the rest of the plate was now cold. The manager got involved with the original complaint and was right there when the plate came back and was bad. She went back and made sure a NEW plate was made up and done correctly. She got us both dessert, and then comped both our meals. This whole time the waitress was really doing and TRYING to do a good job. When the plate had to go back the second time, the manager pretty much took over and the waitress was kind of taken away from us. You could see she was upset by the entire situation which she didn't have any control of. When it was time to leave, and even though the manager had given us dessert and comped our meal, I asked to see the manager. I wanted to find out if the waitress had to share her tips, which she didn't. I wanted to make sure SHE got everything. I then paid her a tip OVER my normal LAZY 20%, for the entire comped meal, including dessert.
This young girl was TRYING her best, and was doing a wonderful job. It was the kitchen that was screwing up. You could tell she was upset by it. This girl was working for a living, just like me. She works for tips. I wasn't going to stiff her because of something someone else did. I went to the restaurant expecting to pay for a meal and a tip. The kitchen service was terrible, so the manager comped the meal. That was right. The waitress' service was awesome, so she got what I would have normally given her, plus EXTRA to try to make the rest of her day better. I would have spent money on the bill anyway, since it was comped, the waitress got a little of that.
Now back to part of what I originally posted. You are absolutely correct about the servers not being "entitled" to anything. They CHOSE their jobs. They choose to live within those confines
I used to work in the restaurant field. I now work in construction. I know how hard one works in restaurants and I know how hard I work in construction.
I tip generously by societal norms.
BUT...
BUT...
I CHOSE to work in construction. With that choosing comes the pay. Comes the layoffs. Comes the difficulty. Comes the skill requirements. Comes the work conditions.
I CHOSE all of that.
Likewise, a waiter or waitress, one way or another has chosen their job and what comes with it.
I can appreciate "how hard" a waitress works. But heres the reality. I've worked both, waiting tables is a cake walk compared to what I now do.
If a waiter/ess doesn't like what they are making at Denny's, then get a job at Olive Garden. If Olive Garden isn't cutting it, then get a job at a steak house.
Societal norm is to tip at a restaurant. That norm is 15%. I chose to tip over 15%. That is what I consider part of blessing others.
I tip on the post tax bill not pre tax. Thats part of blessing others. I round up the tip. Thats part of blessing others. I tip even more than MY norm when service is exemplary. Thats part of being a blessing to others. At Christmas time, I double or more, my normalgiving, which is already higher than societal norm. Thats part of being a blessing to others.
I would suggest that everyone focus their anger at the tax and spend politicians who generated and passed this idiocy (FLSA), and the President who signed it into law.
It's the same bunch who put in place taxes on children's bank account interest earnings.
Everybody is very worried about Obama (and rightfully so), but Congress is the primary source for excess spending and Government growth.
If Congress didn't initiate and pass these "laws", a President would not have anything to sign that raised taxes and spending, or that increased Government.
Of course, both houses of Congress would dearly like the public to concentrate their anger on a President, because it keeps their responsibility under wraps by saying "look, over there, the President is .....(blah, blah, blah)".
It took me a while to figure out you were quoting a movie I haven’t seen.
It took me a while to figure out you were quoting a movie I haven’t seen.
FR Tip: If you click “Post” and nothing happens, don’t click it again.
Best reason to be a lousy tipper: Restaurant workers are notoriously Obama voters. They already have loads of your money they stole from you through taxation that bought their votes.
‘nuff said.
“I thought conservatives understood the notion of social norms. “
So is the civic responsibility to know what you are voting for and not voting for the likes of Obama. If they are not going to do their job why should they expect someone else do theirs for their benefit?
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.