I hope this thread is optimal....
Posted on 10/19/2012 5:36:18 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Elon James White -- I feel like Obama's staff stabbed him in the chest w/ the adrenaline needle from Pulp Fiction. THAT DUDE IS AWAKE! #twib2012 #debates
adamsorensen -- Is there anything more awkward than putting two guys on stools 10 feet apart on a huge stage and asking them to look natural for 90 minutes?
Brian Braiker -- i hope the guy with a mustache has a spot in line. and i hope he stands up to say "Mr President, I mustache you a question."
Dane Cook -- Dear everyone in the town hall #debate. Stop reading your questions off your cards like its a hostage note.
Chase Mitchell -- We're about three seconds away from the knife fight from "Beat It."#debates
dansinker -- I FEEL REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE RIGHT NOW.
Samantha Bee -- When Obama is talking, Romney makes the same face my Catholic grandmother would make at a Wiccan wedding. #debate
Matt Roller -- Before you accuse Romney of not caring about the unemployed, keep in mind he's been trying to get a new job for a YEAR. #debate
ditzkoff -- Mitt Romney read very different Mr. Men books than I did. #mrcoal #mrgas #mroil
pourmecoffee -- Romney: I am pro-choice, but only for deporting yourself.
Jordan Zakarin -- I agree with Romney that we really don't need another 'Fast and the Furious' sequel. Enough, Vin Diesel. Bipartisan consensus!
I got an EXCLUSIVE PHOTO of Mitt Romney's binder. twitpic.com/b4u44a
Binder reviews on Amazon.com........women won't fit
Patton Oswalt -- "Binders Full of Women" is my favorite Motley Crue album. #debate
Adam Sternbergh -- "Binders full of women" is what they find in a serial killer's apartment.
Steve Agee -- Fonzie had binders full of women too. #debate #littleblackbook
Elise Foley -- Oh god, I just realized that now people will dress as binders for Halloween.
If Romney and Obama switched hair with their wives... #Debates pic.twitter.com/PFkzm4Jd 
Josh Tyrangiel -- Romney just locked up the Welsh illegal vote.
ThePresObama [Not the real Obama] -- Romney is very tough on China. He will only eat off of the most rare and expensive sets available. #debate2012
Clay Johnson -- Watching the debates to figure out who to vote for is like watching the World Series to figure out which team to root for.
Pat Healy -- Fred Armisen was great tonight as every audience member.#Debate
David Weinberger -- Well, there goes the gangbanger vote! Nice job, Mr. President! #debate
Feministing -- Guns don't kill people. Single mothers kill people.
Andy Borowitz -- It's as if the Romney from the first debate is tied up in a Scooby-Doo warehouse somewhere. #debate
Team Coco -- You know who won this #debate? The shadowy townhall industry.
Jesse Tyler Ferguson -- That debate was better than a real housewives reunion.
"Give me your money!" he demanded. The man stiffened, but said indignantly, "You can not do this to me ? I am a U. S. Congressman!"
"In that case," replied the robber, "give me my money!"
Green pill. Science said that one day man will be able to fly. Here is the opportunity. It is the safest of them all since it doesn’t change society.
Plus it would make my commute easier.
I heard Eliot Spitzer wants to know if the binders cost extra.
Wife: “Windows frozen.”
Husband: “Pour some warm water over them.”
(pause)
Wife: “Computer's completely screwed up now.”
Comedians in Chief
- When they call the roll in the Senate, the senators do not know whether to answer “present” or “not guilty”. Teddy Roosevelt.
- One day, first Lady Eleanor Roosevelt visited a penitentiary. When FDR asked where she was, he was told, “She’s in prison.” “I’m not surprised” Roosevelt responded. “But what for?” Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
- “I don’t know whether it’s the finest public housing in America or the crown jewel of the American penal system.” Bill Clinton on the White House.
- “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now that when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” Jimmy Carter
- “If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read “President Can’t Swim”. Lyndon Johnson
- During a state visit to Great Britain, President Ronald Reagan purportedly went horseback riding with Queen Elizabeth. At one point, one of the horses passed gas quite loudly. The queen apologized, saying, “there are some things even royalty can’t control.” Reagan replied, “I’m glad you told me, or I would have thought it was the horse.” Ronald Reagan
Top 50!
In at 48... woohoo
Am I the only one not seeing some of the posts/pics - they come up blank?
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