Bacon-Flavored Coffee, Toothpaste, Candy Canes, and 33 More Ridiculous Bacon Products

SF Weekly ^ | Wed., Aug. 29 2012

[nickcarraway]

It wasn't Baconalia that broke us. It wasn't even Burger King's bacon sundae. But yesterday we finally reached the end of our patience with this country's bacon obsession, when we learned that a disgusting-sounding bacon-flavored coffee took home top honors and $10,000 at a Seattle's Best Coffee-sponsored recipe contest at the Iowa State Fair over the weekend. Enough is enough, America. Instead of writing a long, cranky tirade about how fucking tired we are of bacon-flavored everything (other writers have covered the subject pretty exhaustively), we decided to bring you a comprehensive list of all the bacon-flavored products out there and let you judge for yourselves whether the trend is a delight or an abomination.

Note: We limited this list to products you're actually meant to put in your mouth, which means we left off bacon cologne, bacon soap, bacon candles, bacon shoes, and other such silliness. We also left out one-off restaurant dishes like bacon ice cream, bacon cupcakes, bacon cocktails, etc., because there's not enough time in the world to catalog them all, and their reach is generally hyper-local anyway.

Without further ado, we bring you 35 examples of bacon-flavored ridiculousness you could mail-order today:

Bacon-Flavored Beer

Bacon-Flavored Breath Mints

Bacon-Flavored Caramel Corn

Bacon-Flavored Candy Canes

Bacon Chocolate

Bacon-Flavored Dental Floss

Bacon-Flavored Effervescent Drink Tablets

Bacon-Flavored Envelopes

Bacon-Flavored Frosting

Bacon-Flavored Gumballs

Bacon-Flavored Hot Sauce

Bacon Jam

Bacon-Flavored Jelly Beans

Bacon Jerky

Bacon-Flavored Ketchup

Bacon-Flavored Lip Balm

Bacon-Flavored Lollipops

Bacon-Flavored Lube

Bacon Mayonnaise

Bacon-Flavored Mustard

Bacon-Flavored Olive Oil

Bacon Peanut Brittle

Bacon-Flavored Popcorn

Bacon-Flavored Potato Chips

Bacon-Flavored Salad Dressing

Bacon Salt

Bacon-Flavored Soda

Bacon-Flavored SPAM

Bacon-Flavored Spray Cheese

Bacon-Flavored Sunflower Seeds

Bacon-Flavored Syrup

Bacon-Flavored Taffy

Bacon-Flavored Toothpaste

Bacon-Flavored Toothpicks

Bacon-Flavored Vodka

If all this makes you more hungry than angry, you should probably know that tomorrow night (Thurs. Aug. 30), the Nightlife at the Academy event at the California Academy of Sciences is bacon-themed. There will be bacon snacks from Bacon Bacon and Nosh This!, along with chef demos from Chris Cosentino of Incanto, Stephen Pocock of Boccalone, and Ryan Farr of 4505 Meats. Go forth and worship with your fellow bacon-lovers in peace.

[Charles Martel]

"Ridiculous" and "bacon" do not belong in the same phrase.

Untrue. "Ridiculous waste of bacon" is perfectly acceptable.

[Billthedrill]

Point taken. As in, “Giving that BLT to Michael Moore is a ridiculous waste of bacon.” I concede.

[Ramonne]

I think we should carry crispy bacon to snack on at all times. Pork rinds would do. Especially for travel on planes. Everyone on board would enjoy the smell.

[Ramonne]

I think we should carry crispy bacon to snack on at all times. Pork rinds would do. Especially for travel on planes. Everyone on board would enjoy the smell.

[Ramonne]

I think we should carry crispy bacon to snack on at all times. Pork rinds would do. Especially for travel on planes. Everyone on board would enjoy the smell.

[Ramonne]

I think we should carry crispy bacon to snack on at all times. Pork rinds would do. Especially for travel on planes. Everyone on board would enjoy the smell.

[brytlea]

I’ll bite. Literally. BTW Bacon of the Month (Ted’s) had some pretty awesome bacon. But I will settle for store bought.

[brytlea]

Have you made them? We did them for Christmas breakfast last Christmas. To die for. In fact, I’m not supposed to eat wheat and to heck with it....I’m doing it again!

[vrwconspiracist]

My friends Hal and Al will be glad to let’em know as soon as they finish their BLTs

[X. OTerica]

Try a Bacon Bowl! www.eatnlisten.com/2009/10/20/bacon-bowl-salad-yes-it-is-a-bowl-made-of-bacon

[Yardstick]

If all this makes you more hungry than angry

Only a liberal could be angry at bacon.

[windcliff]

Ping

[RichInOC]

He forgot one...

...chicken-fried bacon.

[MasterGunner01]

Feed ‘em to the Mooslimes in GITMO and other federal prisons (including MAJ Nidal Hasan).

[null and void]

I think we should carry crispy bacon to snack on at all times. Pork rinds would do. Especially for travel on planes. Everyone on board would enjoy the smell.

I always carry bacon bits...

[FrdmLvr]

I’ll just have to add this in case they’re reading it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBoLA_BQ4tU

[LA Woman3]

We should send some to Gitmo!