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Study Finds More Baby Boomers Getting Divorced In Their 50s
CBS) ^ | June 12, 2012 11:59 PM

Posted on 06/13/2012 7:39:16 AM PDT by BenLurkin

LOS ANGELES (CBS) — The divorce rate is soaring among people in their 50s — and it’s most often the wife who wants out.

Since 1990, the divorce rate has doubled to 1 in 4 among couples over 50 years old, who are also referred to as “empty nesters.”

The trend is being called “Grey Divorce” and is outlined in a study published by Bowling Green State University.

Century City Family Divorce Attorney Marlo Von Oorschot wrote a book on the subject.

“People look at their marriages and say I could live’ til I’m 90 years old and do I wanna stay in this marriage?”

*In addition to longevity, women are sometimes more financially independent than before, there’s less social pressure to stay married and more focus on individual happiness.

A national survey conducted by AARP finds the majority of split ups are being initiated by women.

“Women in their 40s, 50s, 6o’s still feel very youthful and, if you’re in a marriage where your needs aren’t being met,…we have choices today,” Von Oorschot said.

That may be why dating websites catering to that generation are growing in popularity.

But Von Oorschot said while divorce is a difficult decision — at any age — it can come with more risks at a later age.

“The plans this couple had for 20, 30 years to retire at a certain age are derailed,” the attorney said.

Older couples undergoing divorce may be forced to have to start working again and losing health benefits.

But some believe that when a person is no longer in sync with their partner it can be much more rewarding to tend to their own needs


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: divorce
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To: mom4melody
Agent ORANGE, Effects different people in different ways./LOL
101 posted on 06/14/2012 11:18:49 AM PDT by Little Bill (Sorry)
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To: Grampa Dave

Dead on.


102 posted on 06/14/2012 11:29:25 AM PDT by Little Bill (Sorry)
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To: trailhkr1; Old Retired Army Guy
Some. Majority do want passion and intimacy at all ages. The ones who don't want sex are in many cases dysfunctional for various reasons and is probably the reason why they are divorced-sexless marriage. And this goes for men also..it's not just a problem with women not wanting sex. Many women complain their hubbies have lost interest in sex as a reason for divorce. lot of Peg Bundy's out there. The marriage counselor next to my office tells me this all the time...very, very common.

Agreed. I would add however, that the sex drive with women is inherently different. Men have a much more pressing, and urgent need for sex when aroused. Women can much more easily postpone the physical need than men can, and that's true at all stages of life. As Old Retired Army Guy pointed out earlier in the thread more than one man has thrown his life away because he was thinking with an erection.

103 posted on 06/14/2012 11:32:33 AM PDT by Melas (u)
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To: Sirius Lee
Cuspers: old farts born between 1960 and 1965. They're neither truly boomers, nor truly gen x. barry is a cusper, which is why he's a freak.

So being born between 1960 and 1965 (like me) makes one a freak?

104 posted on 06/14/2012 11:38:15 AM PDT by Melas (u)
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To: Melas

a woman with an older man is now the anti-status symbol.


That’s too bad. I once heard (from somewhere) that the best age for a wife was half a man’s age + 7. I think there is something to this, especially for men over 30. An older man will always appreciate a younger woman and a younger woman can benefit from a more mature man. In contrast, a young man who marries someone his age (or older) may be tempted to cheat when they both start looking their years.

I think a woman marrying a man between 5-20 years older is natural and good for both parties. Just my 2 cents.


105 posted on 06/14/2012 11:40:22 AM PDT by rbg81
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To: Melas
So being born between 1960 and 1965 (like me) makes one a freak?

Yup. It's true. You're in that awkward stage that can neither claim hippie dippy music or disco, nor grunge. Admit it, you go to TGIFridays for Jack Daniels ribs and you hear Men At Work on the sound system and start doing the white-guy-biting-his-lower-lip head bob dance move. You think Michael J Fox and Downey Jr. are young. You used to, and perhaps still do, crack up at the term "Ayatollah Assahola", You have a Members Only jacket in your closet and you're waiting for it to come back in style.

On the plus side, you first voting experience very well may have been pulling a lever for Ronald Reagan.

106 posted on 06/14/2012 11:51:19 AM PDT by Sirius Lee (False prophets offer only a false choice. They are false friends. Choose Goode instead.)
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To: rbg81
I think a woman marrying a man between 5-20 years older is natural and good for both parties. Just my 2 cents.

Can't say that I can agree. 5 years would be absolutely no problem. Other than the obvious physical attractiveness, I can see no reason why anyone would seriously want someone 20 years younger. Although I'm sure to be deluged with reponses that start with, "My grandmother..." inter-generational dating is IMHO, almost always a mistake. What's tolerable at 30 and 50, is a nightmare at 50 and 70.

I'm 4 years younger than my wife, and we're doing fine after 20+ years. The important thing is that we're of the same time, and can relate to each other being in the same stage of life.

107 posted on 06/14/2012 11:52:06 AM PDT by Melas (u)
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To: Melas

Well most 70 years olds are not in that bad shape, but....I do agree that 60 and 80 might be quite a gap. Even so, at that age the woman may appreciate not getting “bothered” and have plenty of time to go shopping to spend the guy’s $$. :^)


108 posted on 06/14/2012 11:58:13 AM PDT by rbg81
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To: Sirius Lee
Yup. It's true. You're in that awkward stage that can neither claim hippie dippy music or disco, nor grunge.

Metal, I claim metal and it's progeny. Admit it, you go to TGIFridays for Jack Daniels ribs and you hear Men At Work on the sound system and start doing the white-guy-biting-his-lower-lip head bob dance move.

Ummm, no, just no.

You think Michael J Fox and Downey Jr. are young.

No, I'm absolutely positive they're middle-aged. I have a 20 year old son. He's young. I know what young looks like.

You used to, and perhaps still do, crack up at the term "Ayatollah Assahola"

No, never cared for that kind of thing in general. Cutesie names for political figures to me just made the speaker/writer look bad, not the political figure. Which is why I use Obama for Obama, Michelle for Michelle, Clinton for Clinton, etc etc.

You have a Members Only jacket in your closet and you're waiting for it to come back in style.

Oh now you really missed the boat on that one. I grew up biker. The old man was a genuine post WWII era biker, who misfired and my mother gave birth to a buttoned up accountant in 1947. He went back to the drawing board, took his time, and in 1963 I accepted the torch.

On the plus side, you first voting experience very well may have been pulling a lever for Ronald Reagan.

Yep, his second term. I had just turned 17 when he won his first.

109 posted on 06/14/2012 12:13:30 PM PDT by Melas (u)
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To: Gay State Conservative
99% of divorces are the result of serious misconduct by the husband and/or the wife...or.....serious selfishness/shallowness by either one,or both.

And 97% of statistics are made up on the spot with no corroborating data.

110 posted on 06/14/2012 12:15:23 PM PDT by Melas (u)
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To: Our man in washington

Sounds healthy to me. My wife regularly goes to medical seminars all over the country without me, and every year I take 2-3 week long motorcycle trip with a friend I’ve had since childhood.

I wouldn’t enjoy the work trips. I’d be bored all day while she listened to or gave presentations on subjects that I barely understand on a layman’s level, and she couldn’t deal with a trip that entails camp grounds and open skies one night and the Marriott the next. You can completely forget 10 hour days in the saddle. That’s just not happening.


111 posted on 06/14/2012 12:16:39 PM PDT by Melas (u)
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To: Melas
Yep, his second term. I had just turned 17 when he won his first.

Good man!

112 posted on 06/14/2012 12:18:21 PM PDT by Sirius Lee (False prophets offer only a false choice. They are false friends. Choose Goode instead.)
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To: absalom01

“”Among college-educated couples, the percentage of divorces initiated by wives is a whopping 90 percent.”

Here in Californicator land, with the moralities of Follywood and the Frisco area coupled with no fault divorce, his 90% stat is probably on the low side.

We can’t think of one divorce started by the guys in the 30+ years of marriage group. All of the women initiated divorces came from women, who attended college at least 2 years or more.

A younger female relative in her 40s, lives in the E Bay Area. She said a common discussion initiated by women in her neighborhood and school and other social circles is how most other women plan to leave their husbands when the last kid is in or finishes college. Most if not all of the women are college grads.

What we have seen and are seeing is 180 degrees from the husband leaving his wife in his late 40’s-to 50’s.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/chat/2894790/posts?page=63#63


113 posted on 06/14/2012 12:20:12 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION IS DESTROYING AMERICA-LOOK AT WHAT IT DID TO THE WHITE HOUSE!)
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To: US_MilitaryRules

Tell your buddy, he is lucky only to have paid for her plastic surgery. It could have been a lot more expensive
getting her ready to “find herself”!

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/chat/2894790/posts?page=63#63 etting her ready to “find herself”!


114 posted on 06/14/2012 12:34:00 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION IS DESTROYING AMERICA-LOOK AT WHAT IT DID TO THE WHITE HOUSE!)
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To: rbg81
In contrast, a young man who marries someone his age (or older) may be tempted to cheat when they both start looking their years.

I let my wife read this, and she wants to know why you think that women aren't tempted to cheat to with younger, good looking men? She further added that would go double or triple if they're married to someone 20 years older, who she doubts they actually found physically attractive in the first place.

115 posted on 06/14/2012 12:57:52 PM PDT by Melas (u)
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To: ansel12; Looking4Truth
I really don’t want to waste time with someone trying to bend reality into something it isn’t, for no useful reason other than to indulge himself.

You continue to mock and belittle me and yet the depth of your knowledge on this subject apparently goes no further than the first couple of results from a Google search. I merely noted that the definition of Baby Boomer had changed. I was trying to point out something that I thought was interesting. You have gone on the attack over it.

The person who originally coined the term Baby Boomer was Landon Jones in his book Great Expectations: America and the Baby Boom Generation. Mr. Jones defined defined the term Baby Boom Generation as being from 1943 to 1960. Authors William Strauss and Neil Howe, who are responsible for their generational theory, also define Boomers as those of us born from 1943 to 1960. The initially characterized boomers as those of us who “were too young to have any personal memory of World War II, but old enough to remember the postwar American High.”

I was trying to be polite and accommodating when I mentioned that the definition had changed. The Census Bureau, and the GAO are not the ones who came up with the term Baby Boomer. The authors I mentioned are the one who originally defined the term and popularized it. The next time you decide that you are so much more knowledgeable than everyone else because of your Googling ability why don't you actually try to dig just a little bit deeper. You might actually learn something.

116 posted on 06/14/2012 1:53:13 PM PDT by fireman15 (Check your facts before making ignorant statements.)
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To: Little Bill

Oh you have no idea....most of these guys chasing me around the desk are Vietnam vets. I take pleasure in rebuffing their crude advances by telling them my dad was a Vietnam vet too!

For some reason that must be a turn off, or they expect Dad to show up and defend my honor LOL!


117 posted on 06/14/2012 1:54:52 PM PDT by mom4melody
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To: Grampa Dave
We can’t think of one divorce started by the guys in the 30+ years of marriage group

Same here. I was starting to get paranoid--over the past six or so months, five of my friends, all in long-term marriages, and all but one 50+ have told me that their wives had asked for divorces.

All of them claimed that they never saw it coming.

Which is pretty much what the study cited seems to be saying: since 1990, the rate of divorce among those over 50 has doubled. What's strange is that this age cohort (my own) hasn't really internalized some of the revisions to family law: with my group of friends, the woman has expected to keep the house, and get some form of spousal support, regardless of her own earning potential. Needless to say, it's not working out that way for some of them who do have good jobs, and in particular with some guys who've taken an earnings hit over the past couple of years.

118 posted on 06/14/2012 1:58:42 PM PDT by absalom01 (You should do your duty in all things. You can never do more, you should never wish to do less.)
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To: Melas

Good point. They might be. But I think (on average) men stray more frequently than women.


119 posted on 06/14/2012 2:50:27 PM PDT by rbg81
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To: fireman15

No, I have been through this before over the years about the boomer definition, origins, etc.

It bores me to have to deal with posters that want to get off into irrelevant trivia, a little post is one thing, but to get off the subject and deep into useless trivia is a waste of my time.


120 posted on 06/14/2012 3:03:58 PM PDT by ansel12 (Massachusetts Governors, where the GOP now goes for it's Presidential candidates.)
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