Posted on 03/16/2012 6:57:25 AM PDT by JoeProBono
SANDWHICH, Mass.,-- A Cape Cod, Mass., urologist is offering a free pizza to men who are seeking vasectomies in March, officials said.
The Urology Associates of Cape Cod is running TV commercials offering a free pizza with a vasectomy, the Cape Cod (Mass.) Times reported Thursday.
March Madness is also tied into the deal as a way of enticing men to undergo the procedure, which requires men to sit on the couch and rest for a few days.
The ads feature an attractive woman playing with a basketball and a voice over that asks: "Hey guys! Want to watch the college basketball tournament guilt-free?"
Then, the free pizza with a vasectomy offer is presented. "You know you've been thinking about a vasectomy, anyway. Now's the time to get it done," the voice over says.
Urology Associates of Cape Cod administrator Evan Cohen said March is the busiest time of year for vasectomies for his practice, with perhaps 45 to 60 being performed.
He said he hopes the pizza promotion -- a free one-topping pizza from Surf's Up Pizza and Seafood in Sandwich -- drums up some extra business.
"It does actually come with one topping. Maybe you can put some meatballs on it," joked Cohen.
He came back laughing--said he'd had a ball--made lots of puns on that word: "You have to be on the ball." “You tell him to stand on the balls of his feet.” “You hold the ball like this.” That sort of thing.
Several months later, I found myself at the same facility having lunch. The rather humorless urologist sitting next to me happened to be the one who had taught the orthopedist.
When I discovered this, I recalled the jokes he had made--all the puns on the word ball--many of which I couldn't remember. I couldn't help laughing uproariously.
Then I noticed that the urologist wasn't laughing.
So to change the subject I said: "What did you say your name was?"
He replied coldly: "Dr. Ball."
Later I made the mistake of telling the orthopedist about this.
He wasn't amused either.
Large pizza, hold the sausage and cut the meatballs.
I think so.
Those wiggly fish would remind me as to what’s not possible anymore.
(After a vasectomy I think I'd take the codpiece.)
(After a vasectomy I think I'd take the codpiece.)
This “medical” procedure is an abomination against God. If they are already funded by the feds, I look forward to Santorum eliminating their funding.
Maybe that’s why the docs are having to drum up business.
I had it done twice!
I was the one out of 2000 where the little buggers build a new route to the outside world.
The second time was the charm.
No Pepperoni or Italian Sausage please and don’t eat anything that makes you fart in the doctor’s face. They take exception to that.
with no meatballs!!
Speaking of inducements for business, some men (also doctors) who returned from military service in Asia, spoke of getting a...well...in Army slang...when they went to get a haircut they also got...well...fellatio. There was some alliterative phrase for it. When I protested that the haircut could come out...uh...quite askew considering the reactions to the bonus...uh... (This is kinda hard...uh...to explain...here.) They informed me, to some relief, that the two features were offered sequentially not simultaneous.
A vasectomy isn’t medical care.
It’s mutilation.
Remember “first do no harm?”
There’s a reason why that oath is now optional.
The rubicon has been already crossed, when in a “health care facility,” patients are being killed (abortion), mutilated (vasectomy, tubal ligation), and poisoned (the pill, botox) on a regular basis.
There is no logical end this.
OTOH, it does reduce the amount of the exchange of possibly impure precious bodily fluids. (as Gen. JD Ripper would say)
From what I understand, he should throw in a bag of frozen peas to boot.
Like going for chinese food in Maine. Stick to the seafood.
I like MARCH MADNESS, but thinking about somebody cutting down there made me dribble...a little.
Just need a brick.
Scripture reference please?
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