Posted on 01/28/2012 5:37:58 PM PST by Doc Savage
You, and your able-bodied assistant, Gort, have just arrived in Washington, D.C., as emissaries from Kepler 22b, an earth-like planet from another solar system. Your mission is to save the Republican party from committing political suicide. Unfortunately you and Gort have arrived too late. Your original flight plan had you arriving in 2007 but Gort hit the wrong button and here you are.
After you and Gort check-in to a lovely two bedroom suite at the Willard you turn on TV and are astounded to find that the United States is now ruled under a socialist dictator and that the GOP has arranged themselves into a lethal circular firing squad from which no one survives
While Gort checks the mini-bar for Romulan Scotch you send back a message to Kepler 22b indicating that all is lost, the mission a complete failure. You scratch your head (while Gort pours himself a double) trying to ascertain what wrong. A Conservative should be in power, the economy should be thriving, and the communists should be fleeing to Venezuela. For some reason your memory-logs keep typing the name John McCain over and over. Apparently, this is where the GOP train went off the tracks.
While Gort orders up room-service, you, Klaatu, begin compiling a list of 2011-2012 GOP casualties. Apparently a McCain clone was anointed by the hapless RINO GOP elites to rescue the country. You're time machine indicates that he loses in a landslide and that the United States becomes a communist gulag.
Gort asks, "What happened to the pizza guy, the broad with strange eyes, the Texas mumbler, Arlen's butt boy, Ron the Wacko, and Newt the psycho?? But it's all too late. The Conservatives have lost again, the country is swirling down the throat of the porcelain-pony and the DNC politburo has begun a Stalin-like purge of Free Republic
As you and Gort hit warp 9 back to Kepler 22b you wonder aloud what could have been. Unfortunately, Gort is smashed and sleeping it off in the engine room. Klaatu barada nikto!
You'll need a good boomstick if you can't remember how to say the words!
Actually, everything is going according to plan.
It’s a tedious plan, involving a lot of last chances for people who, IMHO, don’t deserve them (to say the least).
But already, more catastrophes have been avoided that can be counted.
Hillary not being president for the last three years is the difference between a butterfly dancing around in the sky versus what would have been a kamikazi attack with guns blazing, missiles firing, bombs dropping, and a screaming, suicidal maniac dropping in a vertical dive.
But there’s still work to be done, or the kamikazi will finally get her wings.
Relative-of-yours behaving badly!
I guess you didn’t pay attention to the movie. I love it for old time’s sake, but to be honest it’s commie rot through and through. Try listening to the director’s commentary and extra material on the special edition DVD.
Worry not Earthlings-—All things turn out in the end. America was killed by her own success. In trying to help others we hurt them. The Decline started with the Civil Rights movement and the idea of dependency and afrimative action. Remember Head Start? It was worthless wast of cash. It started there, wars on poverty, Hippies wrecking anything good in America, and has kept up with feminism (You come a long way baby) to a rise in Lawyers and laws. Then, when things were at there worst 9-11 and the three wars—to today. We can get back on track—and we will—but its not going to be easy. Join the Resistance! V for Victory. The Tea Party is our salvation. If the ship runs aground—maybe thats a good thing—if Obama gets his second term—maybe that will be what it takes to reform the corrupt society. If he as Hillary as VP—how long will Obama last????
behaving badly! Yeah, that mini-bar cheese wine... 
will get you every time!
And, yes... 
my dreams have not... 
been answered--
However Newt is better... 
than The Mitter yet if necessary, I'll vote for The Mitter over the Obamonationan any and every day of the week!
Agreed with all you’ve said, Bendy...hope you’ll be rooting for the NFC team in 7 days.
while Gort pours himself a double
While Gort orders up room-service,
Gort is a real PITA.
Gort sounds like Cousin Eddie.
If Gort expects me to pay for the in-room p0rn channel he ordered on my credit card, I’m takin’ him apart with a light saber.
Newt should ask Cain to be his VP, if he gets the nomination.
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