Posted on 12/16/2011 9:11:09 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Despite being at a disadvantage in the looks department, some men are able to snare a partner far more attractive than them through relentless persistence and overblown belief in their own sex appeal.
Now scientists believe this could be down to an evolutionary trait which tricks men into overestimating the value of their looks to prevent them from missing a mating opportunity.
This overconfidence causes them to try their luck with a greater number of women because they are less likely to see them as unattainable.
The study, published in the Psychological Science journal, could help explain the mystery of why so many men think women are interested in them when in fact they are not, researchers said.
Making moves on a greater number of women, some of whom are better-looking than them, raises the men's risk of an embarrassing knock-back but also reduces the chance of missing out on a potential partner.
Only the most attractive men are not inclined to have an inflated view of their desirability most likely because they are so good looking they do not need to, according to an experiment by US-based Williams College psychologists.
Dr Carin Perilloux, who led the study, said: "There are two ways you can make an error as a man.
"Either you think, 'Oh, wow, that woman's really interested in me' and it turns out she's not. There's some cost to that, such as embarrassment or a blow to your reputation.
"The other error: she's interested, and he totally misses out. He misses out on a mating opportunity. That's a huge cost in terms of reproductive success."
(Excerpt) Read more at telegraph.co.uk ...
I think their thought is "If he's not in a relationship, then there's something wrong with him. If he IS in a relationship, then there's something right with him".
I experienced this phenomenon when I started going out with the girl I eventually married. I received a LOT more interest. Maybe also the guy who is getting laid on a regular basis seems more confident and less desperate, and that is a turn on for women.
Something like the old saying "A bank won't give you a loan until you can prove you don't need it".
If I took "no" for an answer, I would still be single. Persistence turns "no" into "yes" often enough to keep trying.
[if you are in a relationship and not looking, they also seem to flock towards you. ]
When I was in college there was an extremely good looking guy in one of my classes and all the girls flocked to him. I never showed an interest and one day after class he stopped me to ask for a date. I turned him down because I was going with someone at the time.
It’s the ‘disinterest’ angle I guess.
I would posit it's because you are not perceived to be a threat.
I was referring to sex, not marriage proposals.
Maybe they think your being married indicates you’re a good mating option, so they want to poach you.
So was I.
Any guy who persisted had better wear armor.
It was more of a “No! My roommate is in the next room! She’ll hear us”, than a “Get away from me, you creep!” sort of no.
But true. People nowdays seem to be shocked when sex results in a child.
I see. Lol!
A man who does not have a high degree of willingness to risk failure will not succeed. He needs to have the attitude that a hundred "no"s is an acceptable price for getting one "yes".
Not-so-attractive guys who develop this attitude in their teen years gain an advantage in their adult years when male attractiveness becomes less important than other criteria in determining female receptiveness.
no guts no glory.
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