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(-:(-:(-:THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD:-):-):-)
Posted on 12/16/2011 4:39:41 AM PST by Lucky9teen
There....my lights are hung
Now to come up with some Christmas Tree ideas:
1) This is a true story about John Porter, from New York State, USA, whose pipes in his home froze one winter. Anxious to unfreeze them, Mr Porter backed his car up to an open window so that the exhaust would warm up the house.
A little while later and Porter, his wife and their three children had to be rushed to hospital suffering from carbon monoxide poisoning.
2) George Gibbs, from Columbus, Ohio, suffered second-degree burns on his head. This is what happened one freezing cold winter morning. Unable to start his car, George diagnosed the problem as a frozen fuel line which he thought he could correct by running warm petrol through it. He then tried to heat a two-gallon can of petrol on his gas stove in the kitchen. Ah.....
Just before Xmas, an honest politician, a generous lawyer and Santa Claus all got into the lift (elevator) at the Ritz Hotel in London. As the lift travelled from the 5th floor down to the ground level, one-by-one they noticed a £50 note lying on the lift's floor.
Which one picked up the £50 note, and handed it in at reception?
Santa of course, the other two don't actually exist!
Grandpa decided that shopping for Christmas presents had become too difficult. All his grandchildren had everything they needed, so he decided to send them each a cheque (check).
On each card he wrote:
'Happy Christmas Grandpa'
P.S. 'Buy your own present!'
Conclusion:
Now, while Grandpa enjoyed the family festivities, he thought that his grandchildren were just slightly distant. It preyed on his mind into the New Year. Then one day he was sorting out his study and under a pile of magazines, he found a little pile of cheques (checks) for his grandchildren. He had completely forgotten to put them in with the Christmas cards.
Why We Put Angels On Top Of Christmas Trees
One Christmas, a long time ago, Santa Claus was getting ready for his annual trip; butthere were problems
everywhere.Four of his elves were away sick and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast asthe regular ones. So, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.Then, Mrs. Claus popped in to tell Santa that her mother was coming to stay for Christmas; which stressed him even more.After a while, he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about togive birth and two had jumped the fence and run away, heaven knows where to.
Then, when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards broke and several large toy- bags fell to the ground, scattering their contents all over the place. Needless to say, Santawas not in the best of moods.Suddenly, the doorbell rang and he went to the door expecting another problem. Butwhen he opened it, there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree that she had brought especially to cheer him up.The angel greeted him very cheerfully, Merry Christmas Santa Claus. Isnt it just awonderful day? I have a beautiful tree for you. See, isnt it just the loveliest Christmastree youve ever seen? Where would you like me to put it?Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: christmas; ofst; silliness; tree
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To: al baby; JRios1968
To: EveningStar
I would be a Tebow fan, if only he didn’t play for the hated Denver Broncos.
62
posted on
12/16/2011 10:53:48 AM PST
by
BenLurkin
(This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
To: BenLurkin
Hate the team but not the Tebow.
63
posted on
12/16/2011 10:57:20 AM PST
by
xp38
To: Lucky9teen

Who knew MF Global's Chief Operating Officer was Vulcan? Facinating.
64
posted on
12/16/2011 11:05:11 AM PST
by
OB1kNOb
(The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and pay the penalty. - Prov 22:3)
To: OB1kNOb
65
posted on
12/16/2011 11:07:57 AM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: BenLurkin
Tebow only plays for the Broncos in the fourth quarter.
To: fredhead
Instead....
We need more.....
67
posted on
12/16/2011 12:20:33 PM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: Lucky9teen
Im also hoping we see snow on Christmas. Lord knows we dont see any in Phoenix. How did you like that rain this week?
68
posted on
12/16/2011 12:50:12 PM PST
by
Cyber Liberty
(To Obama, bipartisanship is giving the opposition the opportunity to do as they are told. (WGensert))
To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers
69
posted on
12/16/2011 12:57:15 PM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: Cyber Liberty
Lovin' it....
But lookin forward to snow...
70
posted on
12/16/2011 1:04:06 PM PST
by
Lucky9teen
(Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
To: Lucky9teen
Were taking Amtrak (Southwest Chief) from Flagstaff to Chicago (32 hour train ride).You're going to pass within 250' of my house. And stop there, too. Might even meet Bob my neighbor.
71
posted on
12/16/2011 1:51:26 PM PST
by
Big Giant Head
(Two years no AV, no viruses, computer runs great!)
To: Lucky9teen; Envisioning; waterhill
There is one I would really like to try (I think it is No. 13); but how do you get the girl to stand in one place like that until Christmas?
72
posted on
12/16/2011 3:30:06 PM PST
by
ixtl
( You live and learn. Or you don't live long.)
To: Lucky9teen
Have a good vacation, Lucky!
73
posted on
12/16/2011 4:05:47 PM PST
by
r-q-tek86
("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
To: All
74
posted on
12/16/2011 4:41:15 PM PST
by
KevinDavis
(The History of Christmas: http://www.thehistoryofchristmas.com/)
To: Lucky9teen
To: Lucky9teen
To: BabyBMW; Apple Blossom; theKid51
77
posted on
12/17/2011 6:00:56 AM PST
by
bmwcyle
(I am ready to serve Jesus on Earth because the GOP failed again)
To: Lucky9teen
Thanks for the OFST pings Lucky.
Wishing you and yours a very Merry Christmas and a Happy and Prosperous New Year.
Regards,
SZ
78
posted on
12/17/2011 8:14:44 AM PST
by
SZonian
(Throwing our allegiances to political party's in the long run gave away our liberty.)
To: Lucky9teen
they have outlets, but make sure to bring snacks and drinks in backpacks. The snackbar prices can break the bank if you’re not careful.
The dining car food isn’t anything to rave about and is a bit overpriced.
pillows and blankets, especially pillows. they only have those like you’d find an airline.
We took the SW Chief from LA to Raton NM this past summer on our way to Philmont. Some real pretty country and some real ugly (trash) country.
Hope you all have a great trip.
79
posted on
12/17/2011 8:18:24 AM PST
by
SZonian
(Throwing our allegiances to political party's in the long run gave away our liberty.)
To: Lucky9teen
I have neither the time nor the talent with posting of pictures to be able to help out. I hope you found somebody to help. Merry Christmas and Happy New Years to you and yours.
80
posted on
12/23/2011 6:39:10 AM PST
by
kevinm13
(Tim Geithner is a tax cheat. Manmade "Global Warming" is a HOAX!)
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