Posted on 12/12/2011 6:07:47 PM PST by TSgt
No ****, there I was...up to my eyeball's assholes in plastic BBs, with airsofters as far as the eye could see.
OK, in reality, my company, Evolved Tactical Systems, had a booth at an expo held by Evike as a part of their parking lot sale this weekend. As we're showing our wares, I spy a young man in Marine Corps Charlies shuffling by my booth. Now, I was in the Army, not the Marines, but sometimes, you just know what wrong looks like. And this kid was wrong as two boys ****ing in a church on Sunday. I give chase. Dork is wearing a shirt that fits poorly and looks like he slept in it. His trousers aren't the right color of green. Belt is non-issue and goes halfway around his waist. Shoes look like he picked them up at a Payless sale. Then the kicker: he's wearing 2LT bars, with 4 rows of ribbons...TOPPED OFF WITH A SEAL TRIDENT! I engage..in conversation.
"Hey buddy, you in the Marines?"
The turd responds, while trying to decide if he should stand at attention or parade rest, "Uh, yes sir, I am sir."
"Who are you with?"
"Uh, the 331st Marine Expeditionary Unit at Camp Pendelton, sir."
And here I thought the only 331st out there was the Logistical Studies Group out at Ft Griffith. Guess you learn something new every day, right? I go for the head shot:
"So what was your BUD/S class number? Who was your swim buddy?"
"Oh, uh, I didn't go to BUD/S, but I'm assigned to SOCOM, so we get to wear the Trident."
Being the kind, Christian man that I am, I give the sinner a chance to repent.
"Are you sure you want to stick with that story? Nothing you want to change?"
"No sir, that's the truth."
"Well, here's the problem: You look like ****. Your uniform is ****ed up like a soup sandwich. Everything below your waist isn't even issued. I think you're a ****ing poser, and I think you're trying to score some free ****. You're lucky the police are over there (San Gabriel PD was just behind us, watching) or you would probably be in the middle of an ass whipping right now."
His response was the definition of weak sauce. "Uh, I'm sorry you don't believe me sir, but that's the truth."
"Really? Prove me wrong. What's your name? I'll call down to the admin office aboard Pendelton and confirm you're assigned there."
"My name is Sam Jackson, sir." I almost asked if he spoke English, but I was on a roll.
"OK, Sam Jackson, let me see your CAC card."
"Oh, we don't have to carry those when we're off post, sir."
"Bull****. Prove me wrong about everything and show me a CAC card that says you're a second lieutenant."
At this point, the Clifford from Evike pulled me away from our poor, mistreated child. Apparently, a crowd was gathering. I guess I was a little loud. Clifford asked me to step back and let him handle things, which he did in a much more professional fashion than I was capable of. The **** bag was kicked out, and now his pictures are getting posted everywhere I can manage. Speaking of which, here are the pictures:
Full Shot (my back is to the camera)
Close up of his ribbons
Yes, this ****head is wearing a mini-SEAL Trident, along with a Silver Star as his SECOND highest award (for those not in the know, the only awards that rate higher than the Silver Star are the Distinguished Service Cross {Navy Cross for USN personnel} and the Medal of Honor). Here's his complete list of ribbons, in the ****ed up order he's wearing them:
Marine Corps Reserve Ribbon (obsolete 1967) - Silver Star - Meritorious Unit Citation (Navy/Marine) - Joint Service Achievement Medal National Defense Service Medal - Afghanistan Campaign Medal - Navy Rifle Marksmanship Ribbon - Combat Action Ribbon (Navy/Marine) Navy Pistol Marksmanship Ribbon - Iraq Campaign Medal - National Defense Service Medal #2 (for a double dose of pimpin) - Army Overseas Service Ribbon Selected Marine Corps Reserve Medal - Global War on Terrorism Service Medal - Global War on Terrorism Expeditionary Medal - Navy & Marine Corps Overseas Service Ribbon
Someone here has to know who this poser is. It is my mission in life to see him banned from every field possible, from every event possible, and from every team possible. I have no time or tolerance for posers, and especially not for ones of this magnitude. Apparently, he lives in the SGV area, and he likes to shop at Evike. Word is he plays at Tac City. Let's burn this ****er down.
He returned to said store today, and an employee confronted him. He posted this later for our entertainment.
"He came to the store today. I talked to him. Approached him as someone who was inquiring about him and his uniform. He told me he was part of the THIRTEENTH Marine Exp. Unit. He says he just recently retired and was attached to a SEAL unit during his career. I really was out of words cause it sounded like such bull****. I informed him I was joining Navy Special Warfare, and was just wondering about his service. He was really stumbling with his words and was very nervous. He was not wearing the uniform today."
Efforts are being made in the Socal Airsoft community (which contains quite a sizeable amount of ex-.mil) to make sure this ****er never shops, plays, or even breathes airsoft again.
Let's start with an iron, the boy looks like he just crawled out of a dumpster. You don't disgrace my uniform looking like that. I make no apologies for it...I would've peeled his face off.
When I think of all the mean things I've said about Marines over the years (all of them deserved, naturally) and I see something like that I want to make a crawling, public apology. That isn't a Marine. That never could be a Marine on his best day, and every one of us who had the honor to serve with a Marine would know that in a microsecond. What that miserable, puling, diaper-crapping thing in costume is I'd be banned for putting in print.
LOL
Something way out of whack. I guess it is "cosplay" at its worst.
Oh, he’s a wanna-be...not worthy of your angst....never gonna sit in a fighting hole with you. Poor dweeb could never get laid even parading around in poor attempts at Leatherneck garb....You and me? We joined up to defend God, Country, Corps...this little retard is part of Country...good, bad or indifferent. Feel sorry for him. Feel sad for him but remember we took an oath to kill for him too. It’s in our creedo...
You make a very good point. He does look like a dumb kid trying to make himself more manly. Probably no father, etc.
Good to hear that your son was the recipient of the interest of some good men. Thanks to you for raising a man who’s willing to protect us.
Mrs. AV
Hell I like you! You can come over to my house and !@#$ my sister!
LOL!
Okay, that’s ... mental illness, right there. Are we sure that’s a guy?
LOL! Yeah, that asshat was my all time favorite.
Is it me or are those ribbons in rather random order?
That guy behind him in the shades is pretty cute, though.
You and I, we’re probably about the same age and may have served at the same time. I don’t know why but the older I get, the meaner I get. :) Folks will just have to forgive me when it comes to my beloved Marine Corps. I take no prisoners.
Navy SEAL insignia
(Awarded for completing Basic Underwater Demolitions/SEAL training and SEAL Qualification Training)
Looks like the ribbons he is wearing are the following:
1st
Marine Corps Reserve Service
Silver Star Medal
Navy Meritorious Unit Commendation
Joint Service Achievement Medal
2nd
National Defense Service Medal
Afghanistan Campaign
Navy Expert Rifleman
Combat Action
3rd
Navy Expert Pistol
Iraq Campaign Medal (with a star added)
National Defense Service Medal
Unknown
4th
Selected Marine Corps Reserve Medal
Global War On Terrorism Service Medal
Global War On Terrorism Expeditionary Medal
Navy and Marine Corps Overseas Service
The ribbon I listed as ‘Unknown’ I can not find even though I have looked at a number of websites. If anyone knows what it is please inform us.
You and I raised our right hand to defend that little faggot in his obvious failed attempt at Summer Service Charlies...as much as it makes me throw up in my mouth a little, I would kill and die for him.
Thanks you for all we we did, or were willing to do!
Whaaaaat? No MOH?
Nevermind. I found it. The unknown ribbon I couldn’t seem to find is the
Army Overseas Service Ribbon
This putz wears two of the same ribbon and then adds an Army ribbon to his Marine “uniform.” ROFLMAO!!!
(Quickly ducking and taking cover.....)
snicker, snicker
LOL!
Pretty cool that one's above and one's below his Combat Action Ribbon (second row, rightmost in photo, his leftmost). There ain't many that come in below the NDSM. :=)
Not only that, but even in the Air Force, we zoomies were required to ensure our new uniforms were trimmed of all dangling/loose threads. That pocket area would be a no go.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.