Posted on 06/13/2011 1:29:15 PM PDT by BFM
Takeaway: You, too, can end your career with a spectacular flourish! Just follow these four easy steps.
Learn More » Looking to end your career in a spectacular fashion? We can help. We’ve taken the liberty of compiling some really effective social networking guidelines for instant unemployment (and, as an added bonus, divorce!).
Tip # 1: Develop a delusional arrogance
This is a must. You have to believe that every privacy risk you take online is beyond all the danger that is unceasingly talked about on every TV and radio program from 60 Minutes to The View.
Tip # 2: Pixilating your private parts is just good courtship
If you see that person that you want to woo, what better way to do it than by tweeting a photo of your crotch? Thankfully, modern technology has paved the way for more direct, dignity-free romance. Who needs a dinner and a movie?
Tip # 3: Over-estimate the character of the recipients of your sexual tweets
Really, if you can’t trust in the absolute discretion of someone who actually welcomes your sexts and repulsive photos, then who can you trust?
Tip # 4: It’s not enough that you have no character, but you have to share this with the world.
I believe it was Abraham Lincoln who said, “If you want to test a man’s character, give him a Twitter account.” Well, something like that. The grueling days of harboring deep, dark secrets and hiding behind a façade of dignity are over. And, really, as long as John Edwards is walking around, you have a pretty high immorality threshold to work with.
Yeah, the crotch pixilation does it every time.
Gone are the days when the press followed Congress Critters around trying to trip them up in some sexual scandal.
Now the blooming idiots just post a pic of their puny parts on Facebook or Twitter.
Could have been worse. His mother could have named him Richard (... wait for it... wait for it...)
Then all we’d have heard was her screaming, “D*** Weiner, get in here for your dinner.”
If I had a time machine, I’d go back and setup a twitt acount for JFK...
You must however be careful with Crotch Pixilation. You don’t want the recipient to think you have leprosy.
I will burn in H*LL for that one...
It’s a fine line, isn’t it? One wouldn’t want to turn off the recipient of the message or anything.
-PJ
And well you should ;>)
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