Need Therapy? A Good Man Is Hard to Find

NY Times ^ | May 21st 2011 | Benedict Carey

[grey_whiskers]

Here's an effective thirty-second session.

Cheers!

[Erasmus]

The best thing to do with unpleasent memories and the difficulties in handling them is ask yourself, “What would you do if you didn’t have this experience?”

Then go do that very thing.

Of course with me, the answer is usually "The same damn stupid thing."

≤}B^)

[Jonty30]

Funny. :)

[hinckley buzzard]

The "feminization of mental healthcare" parallels the feminization of the culture generally. In the 1960's psychology actually had a solid and growing empirical base, with valid scientific methods for the study of behavior. Since the women began to outnumber the men the science of psychology has basically died, replaced by a woozy pastiche of drugstore paperback pop psychology and New Age humbug..

It is also true that many of the female counselors have an overt or covert anti-male bias which shows up continually in their advice to female clients to get a divorce and strike out on their own.

They truly have no idea what men are about, and don't appear to care. One example of this was the boomlet in therapy back a few years when women decided that men's reluctance to spill their guts on demand was actually a sign of mental illness. They called it "male inexpressiveness." It never occurred to them that whatever gratification women find in emoting, men tend to find in activity, actually getting something done.

Male psychologists are not innocent in all this, as they have periodically made attempts to recast "men's issues" as a sort of parody of women's issues. This, of course, does not work. All it gets you is Dr Phil and rubbish like "Male postpartum depression."

[martin_fierro]

[RatRipper]

My ex tried to drag me into marriage counseling when it was her who was creating the problem. I refused to go to someone I did not know to hear someone tell me I needed to listen to, and respond to, my ex’s immature, self-serving demands of me in my marriage.

Divorced from her 10 years next Tuesday. I have pondered that for years. But her self-centered behaviors then, and since, have given me supreme comfort that I was correct. There was absolutely nothing I could have done to save our marriage from her destructive attitudes.

[exDemMom]

They truly have no idea what men are about, and don't appear to care. One example of this was the boomlet in therapy back a few years when women decided that men's reluctance to spill their guts on demand was actually a sign of mental illness. They called it "male inexpressiveness." It never occurred to them that whatever gratification women find in emoting, men tend to find in activity, actually getting something done.

It's only a subset of women who thrive on stuff like that. I remember back before I got married, when I'd be on a date, and the guy would try to show his sensitive side by saying something like, "Let's talk about feelings."

Arggh! Shriek! Don't you have something better to talk about?

Needless to say, I did not marry a "sensitive" guy.

[kittymyrib]

My husband and I have remarked that the most screwed-up people we knew in college became psychologists, psychiatrists, or family counselors...truly the blind leading the blind.

[blueunicorn6]

I’ve noticed this about Democrats/liberals/progressives/socialists. They have a very small range of dealing with things. It’s either “Can’t we all just get along” or “Kill them!!!Kill them all!!!Kill them, and then kill them again!!!” It would be nice if they had some other options.

[Cardhu]

I like that idea

[Northern Yankee]

I wonder how many therapists go to therapists?

[Sherman Logan]

25 years ago the wife and I were going thru a tough patch.

Went with her to a radical feminist (as it turned out) therapist. In her eyes everything was by definition my fault. She was not at all used to having a man come back at her hammer and tongs. She reacted by becoming more and more abusive of me, to the point where eventually my wife became aware of the idiocy of what she was saying.

In the long run my wife eventually became aware that most of our problems really were due to her behavior problems, over which I had little influence, much less control. She has changed most of them and our lives and relationship have gotten much better.

And it all started with her realization, precipitated by the blatant anti-male bias of the therapist, that maybe men weren’t always to blame.

[RatRipper]

Your wife deserves credit for coming to that realization when most women would have been cheerleading the therapist on. It shows she has some values and common sense. My ex still has not figured it out.

BTW, my oldest son told me to day that my ex is getting married next Saturday. He is not too happy because he believes the guy is a jerk. While I don’t want my sons to get in trouble for kicking this guy’s rear for something he has done to their mother, I am thrilled she is finally getting married.

I haven’t dated that much or re-married simply because I can’t find anybody I like. Some folks probably think I am still single because I’m hung up on her. Nothing could be further from the truth, and people that know me well know that is not the case. I am happy because maybe, just maybe, people will stop coming to me and telling me idiotic sh!+ she has done (small town).

[longtermmemmory]

you would be surprised how many women use marriage counseling to justify a divorce and use the female counselor to validate a decision they already made.

feminists are the bottom of the barrel as counselors via court ordered examinations. attorneys have to be very careful with finding out who is going to be the counselor.

[TigersEye]

Lift up your skirt and I'll git 'er done alrighty. ;^)