"Cat"astrophe (Vanity and attempted humor)

Personal experience | 3/6/2011 | RoseyT

[RoseyT]

Not just anyone would be willing to share a story like this. Since I'm me, I will.

Do not attempt to give a cat a pill. The vet will tell you it's a simple procedure. Comfort said kitty, gently open her mouth, pop in the pill, and stroke her throat so she'll swallow the medicine. He might even suggest you tightly wrap her in a towel, so as to protect yourself, although he will use no protection at all.

Here's what will really happen. You'll comfort the kitty. "Sweet, Cutie! This medicine is going to help you feel better!" You'll proceed to wrap her in a towel. (You've tried to medicate this cat before and you know you'd have better luck dealing with a mountain lion but you love her so you are willing to try again.) As you're wrapping her up, she will begin to growl. Yes, growl. Not meow. Not purr. G R O W L. You'll successfully wrap her up, ignoring your growing fear of her fierce cat growl, making sure all of her feet are tightly bound with only her head remaining outside the towel.

As you attempt to approach her mouth with the pill, she will retract her head into the towel. In doing so, she will manage to free up enough space to get one front leg out of her bindings and she will strike out at the nearest body part. This body part might happen to be your nose. You will feel indescribable pain. You WILL release her, as your instinct will be to stem the flow of blood pouring from your mangled nose with your t-shirt. (It's possible that the shirt you're wearing will be white.) Your child, whom you recruited to assist you, will stare in horror. They might not be aware that so much blood can flow so quickly. You will cry real tears as the pain feels like what you'd expect a red hot poker inserted in your nostril would feel like. Or maybe it will feel like the shots dentists give in the roof of your mouth. And there will be no warning. The cat will not say "You're going to feel a little pinch now." (Even if it said that, it would be a lie. Cats are notorious liars.) It might feel like a pinch...with vise grips... and it will last for what seems like an eternity.

Once you are able to stand, you will look into the mirror and see a rip that came close to going completely through the skin of your nose. It will hurt fiercely for an hour or two. During that time, you will hate the cat and wish death upon her. You will be relieved that the wound wasn't a little deeper and that it didn't require stitches because you know the ER staff would have laughed behind your back that your cat KICKED YOUR BUTT. Once the bleeding subsides, your 14 year old will make the following comment. "I guess we don't have to worry about you wanting to get your nose pierced, huh?"

You will wake the next morning wondering how a zit could form so quickly. Is it inside your nose or outside? It's hard to tell! And, my God, it must be the size of Mount Vesuvius. It would have to be to hurt so much! Then the horror of the events of the previous evening will come rushing back and you will realize that it isn't a zit at all. And you will once again wish death upon the cat. You might feel guilt for your awful wish. But then again, maybe not.

[Monkey Face]

Funny!
I simplified medicating my cat(s) after the very first attempt with the very first cat. If the med doesn’t come in liquid form, I mash it between two spoons to make the pieces as small as possible, add enough liquid (maybe meat juice, a little gravy, soup, or just plain water, and use an eye dropper to give it to the cat.
This method DOES need two people, but! You don’t even have to pry the mouth open. Just slip the eyedropper between the cheeks and squeeze. The cat will be surprised enough to open her mouth and let you finish the dosing.

:o]

Ohyah: Good luck!

[freekitty]

LOL I have been there. Dogs are easier to give pills too. Open up their mouths; insert pill to the side of the mouth and push it. Keep mouth closed until they have swallowed. Make sure you push far enough in the mouth and to the side or they will spit up and look at you laughingly. However do not attempt to give doggie liquid ear medicine to one that ears hurt. Go to the vet and let them give them a treatment that last for two weeks.

Cats are the devil.; but liquid is easier. I do have a friend who can get a pill down a cat faster than anything I have ever seen and no problem. It’s amazing.

[proudofthesouth]

Enjoyed this.

Giving liquid medication to a cat is just as bad if not worse.

Shortly after I got my Annie she developed a respiratory infection and the Vet sent me home with some sort of liquid medication to give her.

The first and only time I tried I ended up with a good part of the contents of the bottle on me and Annie foaming at the mouth and her face and neck covered with what she refused to swallow.

When she needed surgery a few months later I told the Vet “ If you send her home with antibiotic's for me to give to her don't bother doing so because I will bring her in here every day because there isn't any way on God's green earth that I can get meds down her.”

And I'm an old hand at giving cats and dogs meds. But Annie? No way!

[Cyber Liberty]

You will wake the next morning wondering how a zit could form so quickly.

I hope by now you've seen a doctor about your nose. Cats' claws and teeth are filthy, and your brief description sounds like an infection.

[ApplegateRanch]

Used to raise & show Shelties. When it got cold, we’d joke about tossing another “yule dog” on the fire.

[cookiedough]

This worked for my cats: Crush pill in Gerber lamb or veal baby food. It is for infants and comes in small glass jars. Our cats licked it off the spoon, even when it had medicine in it. You may need more than one spoonful if the pill is large. We tried mashing it in liverwurst too. The cats liked baby food better.

[Cyber Liberty]

I found a nice lady with a company here in Phoenix, “Vettechchickonwheels.” She is a Vet Tech that does housecalls. She showed my wife and me a couple of tricks...the best of which is, once you get the cat in a towel, put him in a bathroom sink so you can better secure him. Allow him to get front paws up on the edge of the sink so he’s not feeling helpless, pull the head back by the scruff of the neck and you’re good to go.

He won’t try to claw you because he’s holding on the edge of the sink for dear life. Oh, he’ll forgive you...after a few years.

[ponygirl]

All of these stories remind me of a horse I once had. She was a Thoroughbred mare and a bit of a psycho. By "psycho," I mean, "wicked smart."

We were out of town at a big horse show once and she was having a bit of a lameness issue. Arthritis or something, I don't remember, but the vet had recommended Bute tablets. So we tried crushing them up and putting them in her grain.

Somehow, that horse sifted through her grain and left a little pile of pill powder in her bucket.

We tried dissolving it in beet pulp and bran mash.

She wouldn't touch either.

One of the barn kids got clever and hollowed out the inside of a carrot, pouring the powder into it and capping it with a little plug.

From that day on, she refused carrots.

We decided we would cram it down her throat. She swung her head and clocked the groom in the forehead, leaving him with a big goose egg on his noggin. I then stepped forward to give it a try with some gentle coaxing and was rewarded with a crushed foot. After that, anyone who stepped into her stall was met with pinned ears and a fierce look.

So we got serious. We got one person to hold her, and twist one ear. Another person had hold of her upper lip with a twitch. A third person was responsible for getting the pill in her face. After a 15 minute struggle, she gave in and we had success. *Cheer!*

We finished out the show with no further drama. The next day as we were packing up to leave, we had put her in the trailer with a flake of hay. I opened the forward door to check on her one more time before we hit the road. Sitting on the floor up by her head was a half dissolved Bute tablet. That darn horse had kept the thing somewhere in her mouth for almost 24 hours.

[Lx]

I've given numerous pills and forty years I've never once had a problem giving a cat its pill, injections and ointment for sores plus the all important Hair Ball Treatment.

You may think it's bogus but I can tell you whenever we set a schedule and gave it to them religiously, they expect the treat but crushed up inside the correct day's wet food is the drug the Doctor described, never had a problem. It really works, it seems to make their coat seem (hair ball medicine) better and for some reason I can't figure out, was where they were doing the wonderful hairball coughing which anyone here with a cat can identify with. It is smaller, less frequent and you don't seem to find piles of kitten ejecta

When we didn't use the fur ball stuff, I would see a cat eat, and then ten minutes later, you'd hear the horrible hair ball cough,

So my best advice is, keep the cat inside. As you already know, this requires:

1) You have to love the cat.

2) Unlike most dogs, cats don't gobble up their food in one bite. Keep in mind, this is an anecdote, Our dog doesn't scarf down his food no matter that type it is or the food type.

3) If you have 3 cats, get them at least 3 cat condos. More cats, like I said, you can get away with one per new kitten. you need more condos, Some cats don't use them, some guard them with their life. After you have three cats, one litter box per cat works well.

4) At least two litter boxes per cat until you have at least three cats and they need to be cleaned at least 3 times a day. It also depends on the litter, get cheap litter and you will notice it. We have found what the manufacturer says is, " the best litter there is something like that; eventually, we realized it was true. I don't 3want to name it but it's jungle should get you. . We're out of it at the moment. Always use a pooper scooper tray for litter boxes, it saves litter, it help keeping the litter from its magnetic attraction to human and it lasts as while.

5) Find a good vet now, closer is not necessarily better, ask around or while you in line at a vet. People will usually tell the truth.

6) It also helps to already have a cat or dog. I'm amazed at how big dogs like a lab will go up to a kitten and slobber all over it and play with it and then defend it for its life; it's really too funny.

7) Finally, get them a little kitten fountain like this one I stole from a site that parses you word and then shows you what you want to see.

http://www.google.com/products/catalog?hl=en&sugexp=ldymls&xhr=t&cp=13&bav=on.2,or.&q=cat+fountain&um=1&ie=UTF-8&cid=11291343885242849034&sa=X&ei=cNRzTZfQD428sAOG1527Cw&sqi=2&ved=0CDQQ8wIwAA#

Good luck!

[TheOldLady]

Hubby does the cat pilling. He just opens their mouths, pops the pill in, and gently pokes it down a bit. Once in a while, My Rocket will hack one up, but he and the other three usually take pills well.

Yes, yes, we're a couple of lucky so and so's.   ;-)

[bigheadfred]

bigheadfred, I’m going “assume” the suppository would be for the cat. ;)

Actually, welll, no.

I figured if giving your cat a pill was such a huge pain in the @** it wouldn't, ummm, hurt, to numb it a little first.

[Lx]

Oops, sorry about the links, I don’t know what happened but I think it is an indicator of end times coming!!!!

Run, leave you house unlocked though and the aliens won’t want you jewelry except for the elements in them.

Do I have to add a sarcasm time?

[KarlInOhio]

Have you tried to just put a pill on the coffee table and telling your cat to not eat it?

[bigheadfred]

You call your husband "My Rocket"?

but he and the other three usually take pills well.

"Honey, it's time for your little blue pill"

Yes, yes, we're a couple of lucky so and so's. ;-)

Hmmm...wish I were so "lucky"...

[Ditter]

I share your frustration in trying to give a cat a pill. I think the secret is having a large strong hand.

Cradle the cat on it's back in the crook of your arm. With that hand reach your fingers around the back of the cats head. This is where a large hand is necessary, squeeze your thumb and middle finger into opposite sides of the cats jaw forcing it open, all the while rock the cat back and forth to keep it off balance. While the cats jaws are forced open, with your other hand you force the pill (quickly) all the way down the cats throat.

My brother, the veterinarian, makes it look easy.

[TheOldLady]

LOL! Fred, my Rocket is a cat, and you know it, you... you.. you! You... ;-D

He’s 16-17(?) years old, and he has CRF, but he is doing well.

The only blue pills around here are Naproxin. Arthritis! Yecch.

“He’s lucky; she’s lucky; I’m lucky; we’re all lucky!”

[Fantasywriter]

Lol—that’s funny. Shelties are just amazing. I miss them so much. Here in GA they would get too hot, so I have short hair rescue dogs now. Even so, the summers are rough on the American Bull. He gets cold in winter and hot in summer; I guess he’s a spring/fall kind of guy.

[PA Engineer]

Hubby does the cat pilling. He just opens their mouths, pops the pill in, and gently pokes it down a bit. Once in a while, My Rocket will hack one up, but he and the other three usually take pills well.

LOL. I'm stuck with that. They say I'm good at it and they don't want the cat upset with them. What????

[Little Ray]

I was about to comment on that but you beat me to it...

Liquids in syringes squirted down the throat work pretty well, too.

[Georgia Girl 2]

Been there and got the scratches. Use the liguids you can shoot it in their little devil mouth before they know what has happended. LOL!!