Marcel and Darial Williams
Posted on 08/31/2010 11:18:40 AM PDT by a fool in paradise
Marcel Williams is plopped down on a couch in his family's duplex apartment. The stillness is unusual for the 14-year-old, who a few years ago roamed football fields as a star running back for the national champion Flagler Junior Pee Wee Bulldogs.
Since then, Marcel said he had been earning A's and B's at Buddy Taylor Middle School, where he also expected to continue playing football this year.
Instead, school just started and Marcel finds himself slouched on the couch, expelled from the classroom and the football field until next year because of something called "tea-bagging" -- a crude taunt Marcel practiced while keeping his pants on.
Marcel said the boys were horsing around in the back of a school bus on their way home. Several other kids were suspended over the incident but Marcel said he was the only one expelled.
"We were just playing. I didn't know they would take it that far," Marcel said of the reaction of school officials.
The punishment does not fit the misdeed, said Marcel's father, Darial Williams, 43.
"I'm not condoning this, but why make this as severe as it is?" Williams said. He said he has not had disciplinary issues with his son before.
"I've never had any problems with Marcel, no bullying," Williams said. "He's not stubborn."
Neither Buddy Taylor Middle School Principal Winnie Oden nor the School District's director of student services, Katrina Townsend, would discuss Marcel's case, citing student confidentiality -- that of Marcel's and the other student.
But "tea-bagging," as students call it, can be a gesture subtle enough that teachers may not even know it happened, or it can be flagrant -- a student, still wearing clothes, rubbing his crotch in another's face, Townsend said.
It's generally handled as a "school discipline issue," with a detention or a call to parents or some other action, Townsend said.
But criminal charges propel it to another level, she said.
That's what happened in Marcel's case; the taunted boy's father pressed criminal charges, Marcel and his family said.
And what Marcel called "tea-bagging," law enforcement officials called lewd and lascivious exhibition -- a felony.
The taunted student's father later changed his mind and declined to press charges against Marcel. But it was too late to stop the School District's disciplinary process. The incident went to the Discipline Review Committee, which recommends consequences to the superintendent, who makes the final decision.
"Generally speaking, for all students that have felony charges or incidents where there is a student victim on their campus, it's considered very serious," Townsend said.
Nine students were expelled from Flagler County schools during the 2009-2010 school year; all involved felony charges.
A school bus security camera recorded the incident involving Marcel but district officials declined to release it, citing student confidentiality and protecting the victim's identity.
Marcel's father said school administrators stated they had never seen such a severe, long-lasting "tea-bagging" as in Marcel's case.
Darial Williams wonders if district officials had seen other cases of "tea-bagging," why didn't they address the problem earlier, making it clear to students and parents that such behavior was happening and unacceptable?
"If you are driving down (Interstate) 95, and you see a small brush fire, are you just going to pull over and watch that small brush fire become a big wildfire?" Darial Williams said. "Any sensible person would call 9-1-1."
Marcel's family provided a copy of a police report that described the incident as lasting for "quite some time" before Marcel was "pulled off" the boy by other students.
But Marcel said no one had to pull him off. The horseplay just ran its course and ended. He said several other students were doing it, too.
"Everybody was playing around and stuff and tea-bagging each other," Marcel said. "I was messing with him and stuff and then I tea-bagged him."
Marcel said the other boy was in on the joke. Marcel said the kid he taunted was laughing and covering his face and making mock sounds of disgust.
Marcel's family also showed a reporter a note from one of Marcel's friends who wrote that the boy was laughing as Marcel tea-bagged him.
Marcel thought the whole thing was over when he walked off the bus. Until he returned to school the next day and he and the other boys were summoned to the principal's office. They were suspended. Ten days later, when Marcel tried to return to Buddy Taylor, he said he was told he was trespassing.
Darial Williams said he has talked to the other boy's father, who has agreed to help Marcel get back in school. But the father declined to be interviewed.
On May 26, district officials expelled Marcel until Jan. 11. At that time, he will be allowed to attend the eighth grade at Pathways Academy, the district's alternative school. Once teachers at Pathways are satisfied with Marcel's behavior, he will be allowed to attend Indian Trails Middle School. Marcel will not be able to return to Buddy Taylor Middle School.
Meanwhile, he is attending "virtual school" via a computer at home.
Marcel is stunned. He said when he was at Buddy Taylor there was a "national butt-slapping day" and a day to "pop girls' bra straps," which were relayed via cell phones. So the suspension for tea-bagging knocked the wind out of the running back like a well-placed hit from a linebacker.
Townsend said school personnel review the code of conduct with students at the beginning of every year districtwide.
Marcel's father said he feels his son's future, academically and athletically, is being jeopardized due to an overreaction.
"If it goes the way it's going now, it may effect his admission into a college, hopefully not, but these things tend to follow you," Williams said.
I had five sons, all past the age of 14 now. I think I can figure out 14 yo boys. I’ve given no reason for anyone to think that I think they sit around and play Monopoly, etc....that’s a silly diversion from the point though.
I am 36 years old and when I was in middle school in a small town this kind of thing happened every day. The girls couldn’t get to the lockers without the boys being on both sides of the hall and touching them everywhere as they passed. We tried to cover ourselves. The teachers did nothing to stop it. However, I got paddled in the same school for chewing gum. Public schools are like Lord of the Flies.
Congratulations on figuring out 14 year old boys, because no one I know full understands why they act like dipshits half the time. Including my MIL who raised 4 of them.
Well, some of my understanding is based on not understanding, just accepting, although for all their foibles, none EVER acted like this Marcel.
Yep...that’s what makes them the bully.
I know...disgusting. They can call us square or whatever else they choose but...we didn’t behave in these manners. It’s sick.
I’m still disgusted. It’s truly a deranged environment in schools. Students can’t take an aspirin without a court order, but they can - in most cases - perpetrate behavior that would get an adult put in jail, and have lots of people say, “Oh, they’re just being kids. Jocks act like that.”
Rule of thumb: If you don’t want a coworker doing this to you at your desk at work, then it’s not acceptable on a school bus, either.
I know. schools used to be places of fun, sports, games, cheerleading, dances, proms and oh yes....LEARNING. Anything beyond academics was taught at home by responsible parents and social behaviors were instilled into children at an early age so they would know how to act and what is proper and improper. It was called CIVILITY. Today???? They know more about condoms and sex and all kinds of stuff than they do reading, writing and math. Shows too as we trail other countries. Shame on those in charge...they have and will continue to do damage to the kids.
Also, the way the kids and parents communicate (or not) is simply outrageous and disrespectful. The TV shows which show parents and children using words and actions in front of each other that is unacceptable. Moms should be moms and stop trying to be teenagers and certainly stop dressing like their daughters. Also, some of the clothing would never be in my house I can tell you that. You have to be flexible and allow the kids to be fashionable too but...there is no way our kids would head to school dressed like some do. The whole world is upside down but...it’s going to change. I have faith we have pretty much hit rock bottom and there is only one way to go and that is up. Prayer for us and the world is the only answer.
“none EVER acted like this Marcel”
Well, my parents didn’t see me do a lot of things, or know about a lot of things - and I was a pretty good kid. Let’s just say, parents don’t know everything - and most of it is hoping the behavior doesn’t get out of hand. I don’t think I will ever be able to say “none of my kids EVER......” - and I have really good kids.
IMHO it’s just naive to think we know what goes on 24/7 with our kids, and this type of behavior (in 14 year olds) is not shocking to me and most of the other parents I know.
You may not know what your kids are doing all the time but don’t assume that all of us don’t. I can assure you that my children would NEVER act like that. They have never been exposed to that kind of behavior in person or on TV. They are private about their bodies because we taught them modesty.
OK, I’m glad you are all knowing. Don’t assume I don’t teach my kids modesty and respect, but they are kids and will make mistakes. All kids make mistakes, all kids come into contact with things, people and place that are unpleasant.
I can’t watch my kids 24/7 and neither can you unless you have them locked up in your house without any outside contact with the world. I suspect that is not that case.
I’ve run into people with the “My kids would NEVER...” attitude and you’d be surprised what their kids are doing. Just sayin.
I never said I was all knowing. I am however always present. I also never assumed you didn’t teach your children modesty. I said my children are private about their bodies because we have taught them modesty.
I am not the type of parent that thinks my children can do no wrong. I am the type of parent that KNOWS my children would not do this.
If you KNOW your kids won’t do something, you are the perfect parent. I didn’t know you existed - but here you are.
Please share your secret with the rest of us so that we can eliminate drug use, poor behavior, teen pregnancy, bullying, cruelty, or any other incideous behavior from all of our children.
I mean, REALLY? You KNOW you kids WON’T do X, Y or Z? That is just weird. Sorry.
You think it is weird that I know that my children wouldn’t sexually assault someone’s face with their crotches?
That says alot more about you than it does me.
“Please share your secret with the rest of us so that we can eliminate drug use, poor behavior, teen pregnancy, bullying, cruelty, or any other incideous behavior from all of our children.”
It’s a little thing I call supervision. My children are being raised by me and not their peers.
So your children have no contact with the outside world, no influences other than you and your husband? I don’t think that it the case. Surely you go to church, community events, athletics, library events? You walk behind all 3 kids 24/7 and supervise? It’s impossible.
This is not a debate so much about public vs homeschooling as it is about children and behavior at certain ages. I’m sure the likelihood of the type of behavior in this article is minimalized with heavy supervision, etc - but it can never be eliminated. Never.
I’m sure Sarah Palin didn’t think her daughter was having sex, and Jeffrey Dahmer’s parents didn’t think he was capable of murdering people and chopping up their bodies. These are huge extremes - but kids are first and foremost individuals - not parental clones.
14 year old boys act like jackasses sometimes, period. It’s gross and disturbing - but no matter the supervision they will still act like jackasses.
Of course my children have contact with the outside world.
The only other influences my children have are people that are raising their children the same way we are.
I know my children will not have sex because they will NEVER be alone with anyone of the opposite sex. We are raising them for courtship not dating.
You obviously think that the disgusting behavior that you see in this article is normal for ALL teenagers.
This isn’t true. It takes a different lifestyle to accomplish this but it can be done.
There are teens and young adults that have been raised outside the culture that do have a different set of morals.
My children aren’t perfect but none of them have ever acted like jackasses as you put it.
The point of contention here is that you think it is impossible to have responsible teenagers. If they are raised in public school I would say that it would be very difficult although not impossible.
The truth is that there are homeschoolers that are doing it everyday.
I guess I have taken these comments a little more personally than I should have. I am sorry for my attitude.
It really offends me when people expect teenagers to act immature, crude, and reckless. The reason we see this behavior is because people expect so little of them.
I have high standards for my children and for my children’s friends. I also have high standards for the teens at our church. We are youth pastors.
Sometimes my children fail to live up to the standards. When they don’t, we correct and discipline.
I would never lower my standards to think anything in this article was just teenage fooling around.
There are, sadly, few options for schools these days.
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