Posted on 07/24/2009 1:24:55 PM PDT by MindBender26
Cambridge, (MA) - July 33, 2009 – In a surprise public announcement before a startled Boston press corps this afternoon, Cambridge, Massachusetts police chief I. M. Faux declared that his officers have been ordered to no longer check the ID of any possible burglar caught in a home owned by African-Americans.
According to Chief Faux, the new directive instructs officers that if they are called to a home owned by a black physician, for example, they are not to request any positive address verification-identification, even of the person inside the home at 3:00 A.M. is wearing a shirt that says “Massachusetts Department of Corrections” and they are stacking up the jewelry, silverware and television sets near the back door. “The asking for ID is demeaning,” said the Chief.
The new plan extends beyond traditional Black neighborhoods. “I don’t care if the names on the mailbox are Sven and Olga Shnorgenson, there is a blue and gold flag flying out front, old ice skates sitting on the porch, the smell of Swedish meatballs and lutefisk permeating the house…. and the man who answers the door has dreadlocks, a Bob Marley shirt, four gold watches, three gold teeth and calls everyone “Mon”…. there had better not be any ID check!”
He said the policy will also apply to asking for driver’s licenses for African Americans caught for speeding. The chief said, “After all, just how bad is running 115 in a School Zone, compared to a loss of dignity. We can trust these drivers to give us their real names and addresses,” said the Chief.
Chief Faux said his department is also working with local merchants on a plan to ensure African Americans are not asked to show a credit card after a meal in a fine restaurant or when leaving the store after a clothing “purchase.” He agreed that there had been some opposition to his “Don’t Go Shoplifting Without It” plan, but is confident that a threatened Civil Rights suit by the U.S. Department of Justice will “whip the storeowners into line.”
No everyone was enthralled by the Chief’s new plan. The local chapter of ACORN stated, for the record, that in contrast to some rumors, neither ACORN nor the NAACP would be paying for any property lost to the newly empowered Black burglars.
Of course that would mean a wait for the appropriate race officer rather than the closest one in some cases.
Works for me.
If you dial 911 and wait 10 minutes, can another couple of minutes make much of a difference?
Depends on how long it takes a person to bleed out I guess.
Breaking and Entering while black.
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