Posted on 03/31/2009 3:49:49 AM PDT by GQuagmire
FOX25, myfoxboston - A youth soccer coach is off the job after sending home a shocking letter to his team of 6 and 7-year-old girls.
The letter didn't go over so well with parents and the Scituate soccer board and the coach has since resigned.
This is Michael Kinahan's letter:
(Excerpt) Read more at myfoxboston.com ...
I don’t blame anyone for wanting out of here. I’m staying however. Too many family and friends, plus I can’t stand humidity, especially down your way.
This is no letter for 6 - 7 year olds. Most would not comprehend the innuendo, nor care. They just want to run and kick.
Welllll, no. There are parents who go in for that sort of thing; they want their kids to win as much as the coach does, and they often gravitate to this sort of coach.
It's an interesting phenomenon; I've seen it myself (I coach kids' lacrosse) -- there are "yelling coaches," and "yelling parents" who are really quite unpleasant to be around. They'll browbeat their kids on the sidelines, and probably on the way home, too.
Many times, "yelling coaches" have pretty good teams. The kids don't look like they're having much fun, though. And my teams often beat them anyway -- I find that it's quite possible to teach skills to kids and make it fun; and come game day, they're a lot looser, and work the ball better, and play more like a team.
Like your FR name. See my tagline
They're in first grade -- I highly doubt they've "chosen" this at all.
I’m a yelling lacrosse coach this time of year but I don’t yell bad stuff. The young men can’t hear it most of the time anyway and it makes you look like an idiot. If you need to yell instructions and criticism you haven’t coached properly during practice.
that sport was the best thing to happen to me. still playing! playoffs this sunday night!
The thing I like about reffing volleyball, and I once did it at the NCAA Division I level is that for the most part, the players and coaches are pretty well behaved. In many cases, I think it is because they are generally good people. For those who aren’t, there are yellow and red cards, and eventually red and yellow cards shown together.
A yellow card quickly gets the attention of a coach who thinks s/he can ref from the side lines. If not, a red card costs his/her team a point. The next time, the coach is tossed from the game.
Like you say, the match can continue without the coach, but not without the ref.
I still remember my then-8 year old son saying, “Well Daddy I’ve already played baseball. I want to try lacrosse.”
Best decision he’s ever made and I’m so glad he chose to disagree with me. It’s 11 seasons (indoor + spring) later.
Good luck in the playoffs.
Well, being a cad and yelling don’t go together in many cases. I’ve seen a few of those style coaches be quiet too. They can win, because they want to, and that projects.
My local district judge is such a coach, as a judge we’ve nearly come to blows, but on the soccer field we could talk because at least he understood the game. He won because he scouted and cherry picked talent. I win with teams of anybody, because I can project a winning spirit, yet never brow beat the kids (excepting my own kids). I hardly ever yell — never to motivate, only to get a player way out of position and sleeping back into position.
Yet he was better at teaching the skills, because he dedicated the time to it. Me, my schedule then did not permit me that liberty. Besides my philosophy then was to learn by playing, and that over-focus on skills and drills pulled away from the game. I emphasized awareness of the ball, positional play, passing and setting up plays. All stuff that has to be taught while playing.
One of my brothers developed a whole program in a local city where they emphasized skills, but did so in a laid back way. He spent a whole season or two just doing skills development and getting coaches lined up and trained. He’d be all over this email-flinging jake of a coach, nor did he think much of the judge’s style.
My brother was a high school and college star, I was just a player, although I did play one game on a semi-pro team. His buddy in setting up the city kids league was a ex-British and European pro.
OK, all you rabid kids-sports participants. I got a couple of things to say:
1) This letter is NOT for 6 and 7 year old girls.
2) I hate these coaches - they are so bent on winning that they CHEAT their butts off.
3) One way they cheat is to stack their teams. In leagues where recruiting is the way it’s run, that’s fine. But these guys will CHEAT in 6 and 7 year old girls or boys leagues where choices are supposedly by chance, and the emphasis is on recreation.
4) I don’t coach in leagues that don’t keep score, and I can beat 70 to 80% of these CHEATERS given a moderately skilled team, because my kids will give their last drop of effort for me. And I’ll smile while I tell the CHEATS “good game”.
5) REAL MEN don’t need to use little kids to stroke their egos.
Ask the unbeatable team three years ago how good they felt when we beat them in a double-header to win the league. And we won because our coaching staff taught 3 thirteen year old boys who had never touched a baseball how to play well.
This guy is a jerk.
AMEN, Brother.
bttt
I don’t know what they do up north, but at my games head coaches submit a report concerning the quality of the refs’ efforts. I think some are not invited back.
I’ve never had an abusive official, but I don’t mind the occasional biased one because the boys learn that sometimes they have to beat the other team AND the ref. If it impacts safety, e.g. allowing blatant cross checks/slashes that’s a different story.
I agree with you. Our boys LOVE sports and have played since they were quite young. Each ended up picking a different sport. 1 basketball, 1 football and 1 baseball. After a few years of rec. they all moved to travel teams where you had to be selected based on ability. They took the games more seriously, practiced on their own and then would have to sit because everyone had to have the same amount of playing time.
It is not for everyone but it worked for us and it has served my kids well. My older boys play HS sports, my youngest plays travel baseball. We play tournaments on the weekend, everyone plays during pool games, that is where you prove yourself. When we move to bracket play, the strongest 9 play.
sounds like you are a great mother and have some great children
My 11 year old has won the state championship in boxing and that is his sport , the other two young ones haven’t really made their minds up yet on what they like to do but we’ll see what the future holds for them all
keep up the good work mum
Wow! A lot of hard work had to go into winning a state championship and a lot of sacrifice on both yours and your son’s part. Congratulations to him, thats quite a feat!
I’m sure instead of watching t.v. or playing video games, your son was doing whatever it took to make himself better. Whether he becomes a professional boxer down the road or not, the lesson of putting in the extra effort and having the confidence to put himself out there to be tested is a life lesson that will never go away.
I coach U6 girl’s soccer. This is a little over the top for this age. Some girls get it, some girls don’t even realize they are outside...
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