Posted on 12/17/2008 7:50:42 AM PST by VRWCmember
For several weeks now a few local radio stations have been playing Christmas music non-stop, and I love hearing the songs celebrating the season -- especially the traditional carols.
How can you help but feel better when you hear Nat King Cole's smooth voice singing "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire..." (The Christmas Song) or Bing Crosby wishing you a White Christmas with every Christmas card he writes. And when Mark Lowry asks Mary if she knew that her baby boy would one day walk on water, it gives me chills. My drive home from work from late November to late December is so much more peaceful and enjoyable as I hear so many cheerful and encouraging songs celebrating the nativity.
There are, however, a few annoying songs that seem to get a lot of play this time of year that prompt me to change the station as soon as they begin. Just the first few notes, before the lyrics even kick in, make me want to hurl, or lash out at the stupidity of the idiot that put the disc in the player.
So as a diversion from the more important issues of the day, please post the titles/artists of the songs of the season that induce the urge to vomit or cause you to change the station when you hear them.
Here are my top most annoying Christmas songs ever: 1. So This Is Christmas (War is over?) by John Lennon 2. Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time by Paul McCartney 3. Last Christmas I Gave You My Heart by Wham/George Michael 4. Santa Baby by Madonna
The John Lennon tune ("So This is Christmas") represents one of the worst trends in popular music: the adoption of a political "cause" and then promoting it in the most maudlin and cloying way possible. Of course, the late Mr. Lennon's former business partner Paul McCartney has also been guilty of politicization on occasion. In this instance however ("Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time") he chose merely to heave up a true musical abomination.
Given Paul's past productivity, one must ask "why?", as well as "why me?", especially after having been exposed to the repeated seasonal playing of a song whose substance makes cotton candy seem like a lead weight by comparison. I don't know. Perhaps he did it for the purpose of adding to a trust fund for his next ex-wife.
As for Madonna, her cover treatment of the song originally performed by Eartha Kitt is just creepy. Perhaps it's the sound of a dessicated 50-year old female pop star crooning to St. Nick in a boop-bee-doo little girl voice that made my skin crawl. Or maybe it's the thought of what she'd like to be doing with the old geezer, the mental image of which was like accidentally walking in on your parents, in flagrante.
LOL. I had to stop and reread your post. I skimmed over it seeing, “I Saw Michael Jackson Kissing Santa Claus.”
Did you have to post that - even the words make me want to PUKE.
That reminds me of a Larry the Cable Guy line from his comedy show: "You ever accidentally see your parents having sex? Boy I'll never go to that website again!"
Instead of trying to make Jingle Bell Rock rock, why not listen to some better rock and roll Christmas songs?
There are some good (out of print) Rhino compilations of Christmas rock songs. Also some other releases are discussed here:
http://www.mistletunes.com/early.html
http://www.mistletunes.com/rockpop60.html
http://www.mistletunes.com/rockpop70.html
http://www.mistletunes.com/rockpop80.html
http://www.mistletunes.com/rockpop90.html
http://www.mistletunes.com/rockpop00.html
(and lots more in other genres)
Some contemporary rock an’ roll can be ordered on 45s here:
http://www.nortonrecords.com/holiday/index.html
All I want for Christmas is a hippopotamus
but you nailed it with
“Santa Baby” makes me want to stick an icepick into my head.
You have no idea.
AIIIIEEEEE! It's all bad! < |:P~
Billy Idol does a great cover of “Jinlge Bell Rock”
LOL. That’s a great line.
” of what she’d like to be doing with the old geezer, the mental image of which was like accidentally walking in on your parents, in flagrante.”
Shades of “I saw mommy kissing satny claus”
And why hasn’t anyone listed “All I want For Christmasths istht my two front teetsthhhs”? I think we will be hearing less of that song as Obama also whistles his “s”s.
How can you not appreciate “Grandma got run over by a reindeer”? It’s one of the most imaginarily humorous songs ever written! And it has a genuine Christmas sound to it!
The next funniest song on the seasons list is “The Hanukkah song” by Adam Sandler.
There aren’t many humor songs during this time of year. You should appreciate the few we have!
Strange thing is Bob Crane (Hogan’s Heroes) RUNS a website that does just that.
Bob Crane’s SON...
“Jingle Bells, Batman Smells” by Robert Goulet (from The Simpsons)
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