[dangerdoc]

Don’t make out with your boyfriend in the waiting room.

Don’t copulate in the exam room, your wait will not be that long.

Don’t threaten the triage nurse with calling the police and having them arrested. The triage nurse has their own policeman and he is bored.

Don’t deficate in the UA cup.

And my personal favorite is, if you are faking a seizure, the triage nurse is only testing you by saying “if it were a real seizure, they’d wet themselves” At this point urinating in your pants will get you nowhere.

[60Gunner]

HA HA HA! Please tell me that someone didn't actually wet themselves when they were faking a seizure! I have caught pts in flagrante delecto before. None of the guilty was particularly attractive- they were usually emaciated, strung-out, or morbidly obese. If someone is going to copulate in the room, they should at least try not to moan or scream. That's kind of a good indicator that something is, shall we say, "up."

[ErnBatavia]

your wait will not be that long.

Hmmmm...around here the wait can be so long that you can watch the anchor baby growing in the teenage girl across the waiting room.

[TASMANIANRED]

Ammonia caps are good detection units for fake seizures.