****The Official Olympic Friday Silliness Thread****

[Lucky9teen]

"The big news from China is that the adorable little girl who sang the National Anthem for the opening ceremony was lip-syncing. This is outrageous. If you can't trust an oppressive, totalitarian dictatorship..." --Craig Ferguson

"China is getting ready for the Olympics. The official motto for the Olympics is 'One World, One Dream.' Restrictions Apply. Tibet Not Included." --Jay Leno

"There's excitement in the air over the Olympics...also lead, arsenic, benzene." --David Letterman

"Beijing skies are so polluted that Chinese authorities are planning emergency measures for the Olympics. For example, protesters will now only be run over with hybrid tanks." --Jay Leno

"Now you think I'm exaggerating, but they had a practice today in Beijing for the Olympics and a javelin thrower threw the javelin up into the air and it stuck." --David Letterman

"The government of China announced that it will ban restaurants from serving dog meat during the Olympics. Which gives new meaning to the phrase, 'Hello Kitty.'" --Conan O'Brien

"China has announced that during the Olympics, protesters will be allowed to assemble in designated protest areas. Yeah. Or, as they're commonly called in China, jails." --Conan O'Brien

"China is getting ready for the Olympics. The skies over Beijing are very smoggy. The government says the pollution is just a harmless mist. They made a similar statement about the treatment of prisoners - it's not torture, it's Pilates." --Craig Ferguson


"Today in Beijing, a small group of demonstrators gathered to protest China's repressive government. Funeral services will be held on Friday." --Conan O'Brien

"Everybody going to the Olympics is concerned about the air quality in China. There is a lot of smog. Friends over there tell me that the air in China looks like the air in Willie Nelson's tour bus." --David Letterman

"The Olympics start the Friday after next -- pollution permitting. For some reason, they're having them in Beijing, which means the Chinese government right now is very hard at work trying to cover up all the horrible things about their country . It's like when your mom comes to visit your dorm room." --Jimmy Kimmel

"The United States Olympic bicycle team got off the plane yesterday wearing air filter masks on their faces. They're the same masks that kids have to wear when they play with Chinese-made toys." --David Letterman


"An Ethiopian runner has dropped out of the Olympics because he thinks the pollution could damage his health. He said the air has made him so sick, he can barely not eat." --Conan O'Brien

"China has announced that they're shutting down several of their largest factories for the rest of the summer -- so that there will be less pollution for the Olympics. Chinese officials say: 'Sorry, but for the next few months, you're going to have to buy your lead-coated toys somewhere else." --Conan O'Brien

"China is upset because somebody leaked a video of the rehearsal for the Olympics Opening Ceremony on the Internet. I don't want to give away too much, but it ends with the lighting of a torch." --Conan O'Brien

"The government of China has banned restaurants from serving dog meat during the Olympics. This is particularly bad news for the popular Chinese fast food chain, 'McDachsunds.' --Conan O'Brien

[ArGee]

Ayuh - it does.

[CougarGA7]

Piggies - the beatles

Spider Pig - Hans Zimmer

[fredhead]

Itsy Bitsy Spider

[fredhead]

and two responses to Itsy Bitsy Spider:

The Spider by Kansas (Point of Know Return album)

and

wait for it

Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini

[Mr. Silverback]

Spider’s Blues (Might Need It Sometime)—Little Feat

[dmz]

Spider Pig - Hans Zimmer

The rise and fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars - David Bowie

[absolootezer0]

march of the pigs - NIN

[Lucky9teen]

Uneven Olympic Beauty

[weegee]

Barack!

Barack, Barack
bo Arack
bo nana fanna
fo Farack
fee fi
mo Marack,
Barack!

(gee, wasn’t THAT fun?)

(almost rhymes with “withdrawl from Iraq, BARACK!!!”)

[weegee]

pigs on the wing - pink floyd

[Lucky9teen]

march of the pigs - NIN

[weegee]

That’s what I get for playing a “name” game off the last response and not seeing what was already played.

[absolootezer0]

children’s march

[Lucky9teen]

[GitmoSailor]

I'am here to help Mr 0...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Lucky9teen]

CHILDREN OF THE SUN - Billy Thorpe

[G8 Diplomat]

[fredhead]

Waiting for the Sun - The Doors

[BenLurkin]

I had

forgotten

that

Now it will be in my head all day.

[Lucky9teen]

Here's something else you'll have in your head all day...