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To: WFTR
I hadn't thought of this situation, but you're the second person to mention it. I guess I've just never been there.

It's not pretty, although with the right friends you've just increased the people to worry over and love on. :-)

Regarding attractive, I'd say that you can use whatever definition you please. Imagine your ideal man in terms of appearance. Would he seem to be a good fit for a woman who is not at all attractive physically?

I hadn't thought of that. My ideal man probably wouldn't want completely not attractive, but might be happy with cute, or not enhanced looks.

To me, the interesting part of your answer is that when you described "a Man" you didn't describe any physical attributes. Do you have any physical preferences?

Hmm, good point. I suppose I do have some general characteristics I look for in a man. I'm 5'2" and built on the lines of not stick thin, so my preference is a man who is taller and stronger than I am. I suppose in a way it's an age old instinct of is this man a protector, can I count on him to protect myself and others should I be incapacitated and unable to help. Hair/Eye/Skin color aren't that important to me, just that a man takes care of his appearance (neat and clean) and that he's trustworthy. I'm an old throwback, there are times I swear I was born in the wrong century. Although a good sense of humor is an absolute must. I openly admit that my sense of humor is slightly skewed. At least I easily entertain myself with what I think is funny.

Paying off credit cards is a good thing. I'm much more excited by the idea of a woman who is financially responsible than I am by the idea of a woman who lives in debt.

Well, I did just buy my first house in Nov. WOOO! I have been working to get out of debt (not serious debt). It's just as I get older, I find I don't need the best and newest stuff. My car is paid for, my house is not, but I have reasonable payments (cheaper than my rent was) and I have two cards with minimum maximums and I want them to go away. My mortgage company loved me... that whole debt to income ratio they look at. (RME)

My biggest expense comes from buying books. I love books. I have a ton of books: History, Sci-Fi, Horror, Romance, Mystery, Westerns...both electronic and hard copy. I ran out of bookcases.

(chuckling) I recently had a male friend tell me that I would be a hit at a sci-fi convention. I think he was calling me a geek.

64 posted on 03/28/2008 5:57:29 PM PDT by RikaStrom (The number one rule of the Kama Sutra is that you both be on the same page.../Exeter 051705)
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To: RikaStrom
I hadn't thought of that. My ideal man probably wouldn't want completely not attractive, but might be happy with cute, or not enhanced looks.

What do you mean by "enhanced?"

I seem to remember some article recently that talked about asking different people to rate the attractiveness of various men and women. I can't remember whether that article was related to this study or whether I was reading about some other study. I mention that point because the question of what is more or less attractive is sometimes interesting.

For instance, most people would say that Catherine Zeta-Jones is a beautiful woman. I agree. I don't know whether you know who Brook Burk is, but she's also very beautiful. I suspect that most people would rank Catherine Zeta-Jones as more beautiful in the classic sense and Brook Burk as cuter. If I could have a "clone" of either of them, I'd rather have Brook Burk. In other words, I'd be picking "cute" over "beautiful." Obviously, she would be marrying ugly if she agreed to marry me.

When I hear "enhanced," I think of someone who has had extensive cosmetic surgery. There's an old saying that the real gift of an artist is knowing when to stop. I've often said that there are few artists among cosmetic surgeons. "Enhanced" tends to have slightly negative connotations to me in terms of what I'd find attractive. On the other hand, Brook Burk has had quite a few cosmetic improvements. She simply had a surgeon who was a real artist.

69 posted on 03/28/2008 6:11:35 PM PDT by WFTR (Liberty isn't for cowards)
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To: RikaStrom
I suppose I do have some general characteristics I look for in a man. I'm 5'2" and built on the lines of not stick thin, so my preference is a man who is taller and stronger than I am. I suppose in a way it's an age old instinct of is this man a protector, can I count on him to protect myself and others should I be incapacitated and unable to help. Hair/Eye/Skin color aren't that important to me, just that a man takes care of his appearance (neat and clean) and that he's trustworthy.

Most men are going to be taller than you are, and as a general rule, men will be stronger than women will be. However, nothing about looks necessarily says how effective a man can be as a protector. Plenty of small guys are extremely tough and extremely good fighters. Some of them tend to have a "metrosexual" look and personality in some ways, but they have tremendous physical toughness. Of course, neat and clean are completely physical attributes.

70 posted on 03/28/2008 6:17:03 PM PDT by WFTR (Liberty isn't for cowards)
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To: RikaStrom
Congrats on your first house!! That's an exciting time and situation. I know what you mean about not needing to have the newest and best of everything as I get older. I find myself talking to friends who make less than half of what I do but who keep acquiring more toys than I do. Instead, I'm working hard to own my house free and clear.

I'm also something of a book person. My aunt and uncle have thousands of books. I'm getting closer. I guess I'm currently about a thousand or so pages behind on my reading. Of course, I have dozens of books that I inherited but haven't tried to read. I recently bought a couple of books on sale at Books-a-Million's website. I'll get to them at some point.

71 posted on 03/28/2008 6:21:50 PM PDT by WFTR (Liberty isn't for cowards)
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