Translations from the Michigander Language: Hot--Anything above frostbite. Flat--Lacking mountains of dirty snow that pile up in Michigan for 9 months out of the year. Ugly--Not possessing the beautiful qualities of Michigan's rusting factories and rotting tenements. Bluehairs--Those smart enough to have followed the crowd to Florida. Early bird specials--Food that is fresh, properly cooked and absent the pollution that turns Michigan's fish into alien lifeforms. Etc. Etc.--Sound a Michigander makes when his tongue begins to thaw ... if it ever does.
Your examples of Michigan sound sort of like......."since there were half a dozen boaters lost in the gulf this weekend, therefore the whole gulf region is always horribly unfit at all times for all boating".......
:-)
Unfortunately, you are still stuck with the overwhelming all time reality of:
HOT: More than half of floriduh's wonderful weather makes people yearn to live in Baghdad.
FLAT: Floriduh, a place where the highest points are every overpass you drive on.
UGLY: One. Big. Mangrove. Swamp. One. Big. Retirement. Home. One. Big. Bingo. Parlor.
:-) :-) :-)