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I keep waiting for someone to come out and admit that this dingbat is really a fictional character, played by an actress who is in fact named Susan Jones from Wichita, Kansas.
1 posted on 11/13/2007 10:13:04 AM PST by ElkGroveDan
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To: ElkGroveDan
Paris Hilton is the new spokesgirl for Elephant Sobriety.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus

2 posted on 11/13/2007 10:14:08 AM PST by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives In My Heart Forever)
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To: ElkGroveDan
One elephant to another: “Hey - watch this and hold my beer...”
3 posted on 11/13/2007 10:14:41 AM PST by 2banana (My common ground with terrorists - they want to die for islam and we want to kill them)
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To: ElkGroveDan; Owl_Eagle; Sam's Army; Lazamataz; Darksheare; pissant; najida; r-q-tek86; blackie; ...

Sure help the drunken elephants so there is more for her to drink....


4 posted on 11/13/2007 10:14:47 AM PST by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (RIP Eric Medlen. You will be missed.../ Get well Soon John Force!!!)
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To: ElkGroveDan

All a stampeding elephant needs is a few rounds of .50.


5 posted on 11/13/2007 10:15:10 AM PST by wastedyears (One Marine vs. 550 consultants. Sounds like good odds to me.)
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To: ElkGroveDan

Do drunk elephants see pink humans?


6 posted on 11/13/2007 10:16:10 AM PST by Slapshot68
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To: ElkGroveDan
I honestly don't have the slightest idea if this is a real story or satire. It is too silly for reality but doesn't have the obvious over the top bits for satire.
7 posted on 11/13/2007 10:16:28 AM PST by KarlInOhio (May the heirs of Charles Martel and Jan Sobieski rise up again to defend Europe.)
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To: ElkGroveDan

Paris is so cool in the springtime

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/482001.stm


8 posted on 11/13/2007 10:16:50 AM PST by BOBTHENAILER (One by one, in small groups or in whole armies, we don't care how we do it, but we're gonna getcha)
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To: ElkGroveDan

What doe she plan to do about out-of-control celebrities who rampage like drunken elephants?


10 posted on 11/13/2007 10:17:46 AM PST by Hegemony Cricket (You can't seriously tell me you think we need more laws, or that we don't already have too many.)
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To: ElkGroveDan
[Paris] Hilton tries to help drunken elephants

Hey Paris...Teddy doesn't want your help !@
11 posted on 11/13/2007 10:18:27 AM PST by stylin19a
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To: ElkGroveDan

This HAS to be satire, that some AP reporter picked up from some wit and was stupid enough to believe. 48 hour rule is in effect.


12 posted on 11/13/2007 10:18:31 AM PST by Popocatapetl
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To: ElkGroveDan

six wild elephants that broke into a farm in the state of Meghalaya were electrocuted after drinking the potent brew and then uprooting an electricity pole.

8-? uprooting poles, I guess they get rutty drunk.. ya hear about a bunch of cows getting zapped by lightning once in a great while,, but . 6 elephants electrocuted? damn.


14 posted on 11/13/2007 10:19:30 AM PST by NormsRevenge (Semper Fi ... Godspeed ... ICE’s toll-free tip hotline —1-866-DHS-2-ICE ... 9/11 .. Never FoRGeT)
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To: ElkGroveDan

they’re hanging around humans and drinking cuz they got no jungle left.. at the Elephant Bar grill and lounge of course..


15 posted on 11/13/2007 10:21:06 AM PST by NormsRevenge (Semper Fi ... Godspeed ... ICE’s toll-free tip hotline —1-866-DHS-2-ICE ... 9/11 .. Never FoRGeT)
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To: ElkGroveDan

at first I thought this was a republican hit piece


16 posted on 11/13/2007 10:21:46 AM PST by advertising guy (If computer skills named us, I'd be back-space delete.)
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To: ElkGroveDan
"The elephants get drunk all the time. It is becoming really dangerous. We need to stop making alcohol available to them,"

Card them. Make sure only those of legal age can drink.

[Maybe Paris should be as worried about Britney.]

==

Her publicist couldn't immediately be reached for comment Tuesday.

In hiding? I wouldn't blame the publicist.
18 posted on 11/13/2007 10:23:51 AM PST by TomGuy
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To: ElkGroveDan

Paris Hilton has the face of a drunk and the body of a 12 year old.


19 posted on 11/13/2007 10:39:20 AM PST by Jaysun (It's outlandishly inappropriate to suggest that I'm wrong.)
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To: ElkGroveDan

[sigh]...Well, I suppose there are worse causes she could support...But...Geez...Drunken elephants?


28 posted on 11/13/2007 11:13:51 AM PST by opus86
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To: ElkGroveDan

Speaking of getting drunk all the time... How about we stop making alcohol available to Paris?


31 posted on 11/13/2007 3:27:15 PM PST by Hyzenthlay (Halo 3 is making me realise that Microsoft is not entirely evil.)
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