All work and no play is no fun. So why not have some fun with candy.
Posted on 09/14/2007 6:51:45 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
This candy straddles an odd line. Looks like a pack of candy cigarettes, and yet aerobics appear to be involved. This is from Holland, so perhaps something was lost in the translation.
This is French Canadian, eh? Made by Hershey's, who apparently decided that what the Canadians wanted to do was EAT MORE. Sounds awfully American to me....
Well, you can't say they didn't warn you before you decided to eat it.
May contain sharp objects...
From the makers of Asslis...
Yummm...good stuff
Cats are often the victims of fur-ball abuse
girlscout: At age 86 you will die from wounds delivered by a blender after trying to make your sixteenth margarita of the day. (And it's only 3:00pm, shame on you!)
For many people, cats are the purrfect pet that they like to paws with after a busy day.
nuke....you’re slipping.
Darksheare: At age 51 you will participate in the newest reality game show. Contestants battle each other in an arena with swords and spears. You will have a good run (12+ victories) but eventually be killed, much to the audience’s dismay.
At age 59 you will pass in your sleep from undiscerned natural causes. Unfortunately you will be sleeping nude in a local shopping mall.
One night a banking tycoon fell overboard from his yacht. He was saved because he could float a loan.
Rabbits generally lead a hoppy life.
There was a fight in the candy store. Two suckers got licked.
Those who eat candy with both hands are ambi-dextrose.
Still can’t beat the ol’ Milk Duds! When I was a kid going to the movies, white taffee was a popular treat (if memory serves, the bars were called ‘turkish taffee). Also Hi Noon was a great ‘filled’ bar of candy. Although they were around in my day, Good ‘n Plenty was a popular candy in my son’s childhood. If anyone knows of a good milk chocolate covered caramel (besides Reisen which are not true milk chocolate), I’d appreciate the name of that candy.
Candy, who was a sweet girl, married Rich, who was a wealthy guy.
I tried this. It’s apparently totally random except that it makes sure your death age is greater than your current age. I put the exact same data in multiple times and got a different answer each time.
Amusing, but I suspect they are either just totally random or trying to gather some sort of date (like age of users).
democrat: one who is willing to anger 49% of the people if he thinks he can con 51% into agreeing with him.
That’s it - much better in pictures!
Trip To Wal-mart
You are in the middle of some kind of project around the house. Mowing the
lawn, putting a new fence in, painting the living room, or whatever. You are hot and sweaty. Covered in dirt or paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know the outfit, shorts with the hole in the crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from who knows what, and an old pair of tennis shoes.
Right in the middle of this great home improvement project you realize you need to run to Wal-Mart to get something to help complete the job.
Depending on your age you might do the following:
In your 20’s:
Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush your teeth, floss, and put on clean clothes. Check yourself in the mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you never know, you just might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout lane. You went to school with the pretty girl running the register.
In your 30’s:
Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change shoes. You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash your hands and comb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The cute girl running the register is the kid sister to someone you went to school with.
In your 40’s:
Stop what you are doing Put a sweatshirt that is long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different shoes and a hat. Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so you don’t want to waste any of it on a trip to Wal-Mart. Check yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in than flexing. The spicy young thing running the register is your daughter’s age and you feel weird thinking she is spicy.
In your 50’s:
Stop what you are doing. Put a hat on, wipe the dirt off your hands onto your shirt. Change shoes because you don’t want to get dirt in your new sports car. Check yourself in the mirror and you swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look fat. The Cutie running the register smiles when she sees you coming and you think you still have it.
Then you remember the hat you have on is from your buddy’s bait shop and it says, “I Got Worms “.
In your 60’s:
Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose off the dog crap on your shoes. The mirror was shattered when you were in your 50’s. You hope you have underwear on so nothing hangs out the hole in your pants.
The girl running the register may be cute but you don’t have your glasses on so you are not sure.
In your 70’s:
Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Wal-Mart until they have your prescriptions ready too. Don’t even notice the dog crap on your shoes.
The young thing at the register smiles at you because you remind her of her grandfather.
In your 80’s:
Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again. Now you remember that you needed to go to Wal-Mart. Go to Wal-Mart and wander around trying to think what it is you are looking for. F**t out loud and you think someone called out your name. The old lady that greeted you at the front door went to school with you.
Admit it, you always wanted to be a contestant on Survivor.
Oops! HAHAHAHAHA ... so sorry for your demise.
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