Live Heckle-fest Thread of the 79th Academy Awards

25 February 2007

[Lil'freeper]

**WARNING: GRAPHICS INTENSIVE THREAD**

You love them, you hate them, you love to hate them. Hollyweirdos, those wacky leftists who gather together for the annual group hug known as the Oscars. And how fun it is to heckle and razz them as they parade down the red carpet posing for the cameras, granting vapid interviews to equally vapid interviewers, too serious about making their political statements and social commentaries to realize the joke's on them. No one watches their movies. Just look at box office receipts. The money makers are the family films - the ones take it easy on social commentary and political statements. No one gives a flip about their art. They are such sad cliches - dozens of little emperors who have yet to realize they're wearing no clothes. And that's why they're SO FUN!

Speaking of clothes...

Nominations open for the following categories.

7. The Simon Cowell "What The H311 Is That" Award Also known as the Just Say No To Drugs Certificate of Achievement Given to celebs who listen to drug abusing stylists.
6. The All Washed Out Award For perfectly nice looking celebs sporting a sickly monochromatic look.
5. The Morticia Medal of Merit For perfectly nice looking celebs that think goth is cute. Also for unnatural and extremely artifical hair colors.
4. The Dude, Your Mother Dresses You Funny Award For male celebs that shouldn't be allowed to pick out their own clothes.
3. The Treasure to Trash Award For the perfectly nice looking celebs that choose to wear garbage bags. Also for the most creative use of recycleable materials in a garment.
2. The Sheer Overexposure Award For when next to nothing is left to the imagination.
1. The Bjork Award The outfit that causes such severe psychological trauma that viewers are scarred for decades or for outfits that resemble animals (whole or in part).

Nominations will be accepted throughout the evening for the following awards:

1. Lavender Oscar: For the individual(s) whose contributions to film and the events of the evening serve to further undermine traditional American values.

2. Red Oscar: For the individual(s) whose contributions to film and the events of the evening serve as a reminder of just how Anti-American the Hollyweirdos are.

3. The Britney: For the individual(s) whose contributions to film and the events of the evening serve to illustrate just how far down it really is to rock bottom.

Tonight's Convenient Truth Weather Conditions:

Tonight's Convenient Truth Weather Forcast:

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This thread is offered humbly as an homage to the wild and raucus Oscars threads of years past. So let your hair down and have fun!

[silent_jonny]

A standing-O for Morricone. He deserves it. Not somebody like Algore.

[RosieCotton]

Heh...Gollum popping up as David Bowie's assistant was kind of a surprise.

[Mo1]

Clint is now a translator?

[daybreakcoming]

OK....Marconi (?) is making my eyes burn now and screen blurry.

[Lil'freeper]

I didn't notice him. I was too stuned by Bowie.

[spotbust1]

Are you from Lafayette? I'm from the big city of Opelousas.

[Borges]

Eastwood still remembers Italian from listening to Sergio Leone all those years ago!

[Tarkus2040]

Ennio Morricone--love the soundtrack from The Mission.

Hey, BM! Best part of the evening so far. Don't forget about the soundtrack to John Carpenter's "The Thing"! One of the best and most memorable soundtracks I've ever heard. As eerie and chilling as the creature itself!

[eleni121]

I'm glad to see your post about The Unforgiven. I agree of course.

Revisionist western indeed.

[ShorelineMike]

l Gore won on a Michael Moore technicality - a loophole, actually. It's a pretty big loophole.

A loophole big enough to drive Michael Moore AND Al Gore through.

[silent_jonny]

ROFLMAO! I think Sanjaya has earned his own level of gayness .... somewhere above "Just Damn" :-D

[Borges]

And a lame one. The Leone films Eastwood made his name on are much more intelligent revisionist westerns.

[DCPatriot]

Okay...time to play the other music......

[mass55th]

"OK....Marconi (?) is making my eyes burn now and screen blurry."

LOL! I can't believe he doesn't speak English.

[ABG(anybody but Gore)]

Just think about how many of the stars of Team America are there... all we're missing is Mahtt Day-mon and Arec Barrwin.

We should have all of the Film Actors Guild in there. F.A.G. should definitely be present.

[silent_jonny]

Where's Michael Richards?

LOLOLOL!

[Jrabbit]

ACK! Commercial with "All By Myself"!! noooooooooooooooo

[Lil'freeper]

I can't believe he doesn't speak English.

There aren't very many who do speak English in California any more.

[Sue Perkick]

Good for her! God bless her.

I bet they do. Deep down they know she's better than the Hollywood "elite" in more ways than one.

[racing fan]

And a lame one. The Leone films Eastwood made his name on are much more intelligent revisionist westerns.
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The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly was great.

Also Once Upon a Time in the West, but Eastwood wasn't in that one.