Ewwww....Funny story though. A friend caught his kid working in the nose mines. He told him to stop digging and the boy replied, "I can't Dad -- I'm addicted to the stuff."
eThay estBay ondeBlay okeJay!
A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee.
After sitting there for awhile, he yells to the waiter, "Hey,
you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, buddy, I think it is only fair --
given that you are blind -- that you should know "five things":
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. blonde woman with a black
belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a profes-
sional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional
wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister! Do you still wanna tell
that joke?
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters,
"No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
True story...Knew an Ensign on the USS JFK years ago, named Johnny Bloom (name NOT changed to protect the innocent), who had the bad habit of pickong his nose and disposing of the pickings 2 inches below said nose.
This Ensign was on watch in Damage Control Central when I went down there to sign a daily report. The Chief Engineer (a Commander) was there, as well. It just so happened that the Chief Engineer caught Ensign Bloom in the act of nose mining.
The Chief Engineer yelled out, "BLOOM!!!! GET THE F*** OUT OF MY CONTROL!!!!! AND DON'T YOU EVER COME BACK!!!!"
Said Ensign was transferred from Engineering Dept. to Supply Dept. within the week.
