[Detroit] Lions news is bad news

realfootball365.com ^ | December 12, 2006 | Os Davis

[SunkenCiv]

...With a record of 2-11, the silver-and-Honolulu blue are firmly entrenched at No. 32 on any power poll in this spiral arm of the galaxy. Entrenched, that is, until another loss drops them behind Ohio State, Florida and the Hamburg Sea Devils. Think it can't get worse? Hey, this is the Lions. NFL schedule makers saw fit to arrange the endgame Kitty Cats' so, so long season likewise: at the Green Bay Packers where the Lions haven't won since a guy named Brett Favre took over there (that's right, 1992); against the Chicago Bears in a game which figures to see Motor City backers immortalize the chant "Fire *&#!!%&ing Millen!"; and at the Dallas Cowboys , who on New Year's Eve will probably looking to bag the No. 2 seed in the NFC... Kevin Jones, who was knocked out of the loss to the Minnesota Vikings on Sunday, figures to be out for the remainder of the season... Pro Bowl nominee Shaun Rogers... was slapped by the commissioner after testing positive for steroids. The judgment had Rogers forcibly sitting out four games and giving up $250,000. Naturally, "Big Baby" was innocent, protesting that the positive test represented a product that the 354-pound Rogers used to help him control his weight. Or he has asthma. Or he thought they were Shawne Merriman's Pez. Or something... Team officials announced yesterday that WR Mike Williams - you remember him: the former first-round draft pick cum The Most Useless Player in the NFL Today - flunked a weigh-in. At 240 pounds, Williams only missed the target set by Rod Marinelli and Co. by 20. Though no punitive measures have been mentioned, any punishment would seem pointless other then some quality time on the bench... Fire &#!!%&ing Millen.

[SunkenCiv]

I've gotta believe that somehow, the Detroit Lions will grab the upcoming #1 draft pick.

• Browns win 3rd straight

[SunkenCiv]

http://www.google.com/hostednews/canadianpress/article/ALeqM5jbbQSnd39LaS1-4osoTzNjcwWmuw

[snip] Schwartz is considering going back to Daunte Culpepper at quarterback instead of giving Drew Stanton his second career start. Stanton earned the job after helping the Lions rally the previous week against Arizona, but only led Detroit to three points during Sunday’s 20-6 loss to San Francisco... While Schwartz won’t decide on a quarterback until later in the week, Stanton knew he lost a chance to win the spot as Matthew Stafford’s unquestioned backup. The former second-round pick turned the ball over four times — three interceptions and a fumble.

[SunkenCiv]

• 2010 NFL DRAFT LIVE THREAD

[SunkenCiv]

Once again, the Lions organization hires someone who can’t form sentences to write up their schedule. We see such things as “at Chicago Bears at Bears” and “vs Philadelphia Eagles vs Eagles”, and each week (other than the Bye week) is one or the other, and both are just stone cold stupid. I also eliminated the duplicate dates and triplicate game times included in each week.

Schedule And Events
http://www.detroitlions.com/schedule-and-events/season-schedule-dynamic.html

Week 01 Sunday, September 12, 2010, 1:00PM EDT at Chicago Bears at Bears

Week 02 Sunday, September 19, 2010, 1:00PM EDT vs Philadelphia Eagles vs Eagles

Week 03 Sunday, September 26, 2010, 1:00PM EDT at Minnesota Vikings at Vikings

Week 04 Sunday, October 03, 2010, 1:00PM EDT at Green Bay Packers at Packers

Week 05 Sunday, October 10, 2010, 1:00PM EDT vs St. Louis Rams vs Rams

Week 06 Sunday, October 17, 2010, 1:00PM EDT at New York Giants at Giants

Week 07 Bye

Week 08 Sunday, October 31, 2010, 1:00PM EDT vs Washington Redskins vs Redskins

Week 09 Sunday, November 07, 2010, 1:00PM EST vs New York Jets vs Jets

Week 10 Sunday, November 14, 2010, 1:00PM EST at Buffalo Bills at Bills

Week 11 Sunday, November 21, 2010, 1:00PM EST at Dallas Cowboys at Cowboys

Week 12 Thursday, November 25, 2010, 12:30PM EST vs New England Patriots vs Patriots

Week 13 Sunday, December 05, 2010, 1:00PM EST vs Chicago Bears vs Bears

Week 14 Sunday, December 12, 2010, 1:00PM EST vs Green Bay Packers vs Packers

Week 15 Sunday, December 19, 2010, 1:00PM EST at Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Buccaneers

Week 16 Sunday, December 26, 2010, 1:00PM EST at Miami Dolphins at Dolphins

Week 17 Sunday, January 02, 2011, 1:00PM EST vs Minnesota Vikings vs Vikings

[SunkenCiv]

I'm pained to announce that the Lions have been will be mathematically eliminated from the playoffs for the eleventh straight year.

1. at Chicago Bears, loss
2. at home vs Philadelphia Eagles, loss
3. at Minnesota Vikings, loss
4. at Green Bay Packers, loss
5. at home vs St. Louis Rams, win
6. at New York Giants, loss
7. Bye
8. at home vs Washington Redskins, win
9. at home vs New York Jets, loss
10. at Buffalo Bills, win
11. at Dallas Cowboys, loss
12. at home vs New England Patriots, loss
13. at home vs Chicago Bears, win
14. at home vs Green Bay Packers, win
15. at Tampa Bay Buccaneers, loss
16. at Miami Dolphins, loss
17. at home vs Minnesota Vikings, loss

5-11 for the season. Hey, call me an optimist.

[SunkenCiv]

Reports: Brett Favre plans to retire
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/2563776/posts
Brett Favre Plans To Retire A Third Time
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/2563825/posts

[SunkenCiv]

I missed ps game 3 by some hours, but the description wasn't too encouraging; this one is even worse, so I'm glad I didn't set aside time to watch on Thursday:

• Detroit Lions Preseason Wrap-Up: Winners and Losers, Week 4 | Bleacher Report

[Perdogg]

Since the current NFL alignment the Lions are 31-97 over 8 years.

Indianapolis Colts 99 29 0 0.773

New England Patriots 96 32 0 0.750

Philadelphia Eagles 81 46 1 0.637

Pittsburgh Steelers 81 46 1 0.637

San Diego Chargers 79 49 0 0.617

Denver Broncos 74 54 0 0.578

Green Bay Packers 74 54 0 0.578

Dallas Cowboys 72 56 0 0.563

Tennessee Titans 71 57 0 0.555

New York Giants 69 59 0 0.539

Carolina Panthers 71 57 0 0.555

Baltimore Ravens 70 58 0 0.547

Seattle Seahawks 67 61 0 0.523

Minnesota Vikings 68 60 0 0.531

New Orleans Saints 66 62 0 0.516

Jacksonville Jaguars 63 65 0 0.492

Atlanta Falcons 64 63 1 0.504

Chicago Bears 63 65 0 0.492

New York Jets 61 67 0 0.477

Tampa Bay Buccaneers 60 68 0 0.469

Cincinnati Bengals 58 69 1 0.457

Miami Dolphins 57 71 0 0.445

Kansas City Chiefs 57 71 0 0.445

Buffalo Bills 55 73 0 0.430

Washington Redskins 54 74 0 0.422

Arizona Cardinals 52 76 0 0.406

San Francisco 49ers 50 78 0 0.391

St. Louis Rams 47 81 0 0.367

Houston Texans 49 79 0 0.383

Cleveland Browns 47 81 0 0.367

Oakland Raiders 40 88 0 0.313

Detroit Lions 31 97 0 0.242

[Vigilantcitizen]

I feel for ya bro...I’m a long suffering falcon fan. Whilst our prospects are looking up..I just don’t know about y’alls.

Glad y’all took Chris Houston, or toast as he was known on the falcon MB, off our hands.

[rdl6989]

Re: the Lions W-L: That’s horrible. Unspeakably bad.

[ken5050]

I met Matt Stafford’s mom a few weeks ago, at a party in St. Pete. Lovely lady..all she would say was that she’s very happy for her son that a large part of his contract is guaranteed..

[SunkenCiv]

That’s a tricky one to evaluate — some players can’t seem to do anything right, get traded or whatever, wind up looking like future Hall of Famers when they change teams. Of course, here in Detroit the cheerleading squad can sometimes look like HoFers by contrast with the team — and the cheerleaders are drawn from area high schools.

[SunkenCiv]

Some ancient writer said, “happy are they who have no history”, and he never even heard of the NFL.

[Vigilantcitizen]

Yeah..I really hated to see him struggle...he’s a great kid...hard worker..just couldn’t learn to turn his head. Hope he does well.

[SunkenCiv]

thanks!

[Lando Lincoln]

Lions beat Bears in opener. You saw it here first.

[Vigilantcitizen]

I could see that.

[SunkenCiv]

Thanks LL. Is it just me, or were an unusual number of decent QBs cut around the NFL after preseason game four? That’s based on the local paper’s coverage today.

Oh, okay, looking for something about this, found this:

http://blogs.ocweekly.com/navelgazing/sports/matt-leinart-colt-brennan-cut/

and that mentions the “UFL” — I guess I’m outta the loop...

http://www.ufl-football.com/

[SunkenCiv]

Heh... I would *enjoy* seeing that. Just how rough *are* the Bears, anyway?

More about Leinart:

http://www.tampabay.com/sports/reports-texans-after-qb-leinart/1119844

[SunkenCiv]

Lions at CB:

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/452278-youth-is-being-served-for-the-detroit-lions
http://www.mlive.com/lions/index.ssf/2010/09/veteran_dre_bly_among_lions_fi.html
http://mbd.scout.com/mb.aspx?s=101&f=1795&t=6309946 (see “TheRealMoose” comment)
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/432758-detroit-lion-preview-chris-houston-leads-an-improved-cornerback-group