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Tony Romo Realigns the Stars
San Francisco Examiner ^ | November 27, 2006 | Bob Frantz

Posted on 11/27/2006 12:50:41 PM PST by Arec Barrwin

Romo realigns the stars

Bob Frantz, The Examiner

Nov 27, 2006 3:00 AM (9 hrs ago)

SAN FRANCISCO - Damn you, Tony Romo! Damn you straight to hell! Do you have any idea what kind of damage you’ve done? Do you?

Everything was going according to plan, you know. The implosion of the NFL’s version of the New York Yankees was imminent and Drew Bledsoe was seeing to it personally. Veins were popping on the three most despicable faces of America’s (Most Hated) Team with every interception, incompletion and immobilization. And the simultaneous eruption of egos in Texas Stadium was going to leave a mushroom cloud over Dallas to be seen for miles.

You see, every Bledsoe mistake moved the clinically insane Terrell Owens one step closer to giving him the “Garcia-McNabb” treatment, which Amnesty International ranks just above water-boarding on the scale of torture for NFL quarterbacks.

And with every sign of Owens’ impending explosion, Cowboys coach Bill Parcells moved ever closer to physically assaulting some poor Dallas beat reporter who asked about No. 81 one too many times — on live television.

And with every indication that the Tuna was growing more and more agitated about having to be the master of Jerry Jones’ three-ring circus, the Dallas owner’s plastic face began to melt like a box of crayons in the hot Texas sun.

The stars were all aligned, you see. The three-way collision that awaited Owens, Parcells, and Jones would have decimated the hated Cowboys franchise, leaving Skeletor Jones stuck with an untradable, overpriced, nap-taking, pill-popping wide receiver and a detestable, egomaniacal head coach who wants nothing to do with him.

And then along came Romo.

Yes, along came Tony Romo, with his sparkling resume written in invisible ink and his barbecue-restaurant-sounding name, suddenly playing the role of Roger Staubach meets Troy Aikman on steroids.

The Division I-AA product from mighty Eastern Illinois has ruined the party for all of us who were watching the Dallas soap opera as if we were waiting for the thermometer to pop on Thursday’s Thanksgiving turkey. Five starts, four wins, nearly 1,400 yards with 10 touchdowns and two interceptions.

The kid doesn’t miss. He’s finding the mark with 71 percent of his passes and he’s showing the same poise under pressure that once made Roger the artful Dodger. He’s got the respect of his teammates and the support of his coach, and suddenly there will be no eruption in Texas.

Suddenly T.O.’s happy. That makes me sad. You know, sometimes you actually root for miserable human beings to remain miserable — just to bring a little justice to the world.

Suddenly the Tuna’s at ease. That makes me upset. Because sometimes you root for ornery, obnoxious human beings to remain ornery and obnoxious — just to make sure they’re not sleeping well at night.

And suddenly, Skeletor’s face is holding firm and that makes me nervous. Yes, sometimes you root for vain billionaires to melt in the sun, rather than basking in the glow of peace in their worlds — just because they deserve it.

America’s (Most Hated) team is rolling again, looking more and more like the only true challengers to the Bears’ supremacy in the NFC.

Damn you, Tony Romo. Damn you to hell.

Examiner


TOPICS: Sports
KEYWORDS: cowboys; dallas; parcells; romo
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To: Arec Barrwin
LoL---

How 'Bout Dem Cowboys!!!!!

21 posted on 11/27/2006 1:09:34 PM PST by txroadkill
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To: linear

That is a great phrase. He probably won't be as flawless once Ds can study him and his tendencies, but he's got the skills to be a force for a long time to come.

I just like the storyline--the undrafted guy everyone wrote off and wouldn't give a chance. He fills in for a guy badly stumbling, everyone thinking the season is lost, and he heroically rescues the sinking ship. They never saw him coming. Believed a mediocrity, he proved himself a genius.

I'm going a bit over the top here but it's a theme throughout history. Octavian. Napoleon. Hitler. Stalin. Romo. Cyclopean Squid?


22 posted on 11/27/2006 1:19:54 PM PST by Cyclopean Squid (Authoritarianism depends on lack of information. Totalitarianism depends on misinformation.)
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To: txroadkill

I was just about to post that!!!!

I've been a Cowboys fan since I was this >|< tall, and I'm liking this! I love living here in Redskins country when the 'boys are playing well!


23 posted on 11/27/2006 1:29:46 PM PST by KoRn
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To: Arec Barrwin
I have hated the Cowboys since 1975.


24 posted on 11/27/2006 1:30:56 PM PST by Spruce
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To: discostu

Losing yesterday after being up twenty-one points with ten minutes to play is a loss the G-Men will not recover from. Stick a fork in them they're done! And I say that as a Giants fan. In fact I think it will cost Coughlin his job at the end of the season.


25 posted on 11/27/2006 1:37:54 PM PST by Rummyfan (Iraq: Give therapeutic violence a chance!)
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To: Arec Barrwin

And Bledsoe gets to play Wally Pipp ... twice!!! Look for that question in Trivial Pursuit 2006.


26 posted on 11/27/2006 1:59:07 PM PST by NonValueAdded (Prayers for our patriot brother, 68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub. Brian, we're all pulling for you!)
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To: Rummyfan

Maybe, maybe not, it coulbe be the event that galvanizes the team for action, like the Steelers' 3 game skid last year. Mathematically it's all about Sunday though, if the Cowboys win that pretty much seals the season for both teams.


27 posted on 11/27/2006 2:00:07 PM PST by discostu (we're two of a kind, silence and I)
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To: libertarianPA
Now they look like the best team in the NFC

In the last two weeks, among NFC teams only Dallas and Chicago have beaten AFC teams. At least the Conference got off to a good start early (now, -12), unlike 2004 (-24).

28 posted on 11/27/2006 2:01:28 PM PST by lepton ("It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into"--Jonathan Swift)
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To: Arec Barrwin

I'll hold my opinion till after the SB. But, Go Boys!


29 posted on 11/27/2006 2:08:51 PM PST by wolfcreek (Suegna como si vivieras para siempre; vive como si fueses a morir hoy.)
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To: txroadkill

Vanderjerk is gone!!!!


30 posted on 11/27/2006 3:11:38 PM PST by dfwgator
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To: Arec Barrwin
Vanderjerk out, Martin Gramatica in
31 posted on 11/27/2006 3:14:17 PM PST by dfwgator
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To: Arec Barrwin
The Cowboys will almost win the NFC East by default because:

1) The Giants have WAY too many injuries, which is start to affect the team in a big way.
2) The Redskins quality of play almost depends on the phases of the Moon.
3) The Eagles have been decimated by the loss of Donovan McNabb again.

32 posted on 11/27/2006 5:43:17 PM PST by RayChuang88
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To: Arec Barrwin

I'm a life-long New England Patriots fan.
Parcells...Bledsoe...Glenn...
Makes me giggle like a little school girl when I hear those three names.
Moe...Larry...Curly...
see-no-evil...speak-no-evil...hear-no-evil
heheheheheheheheh...


33 posted on 11/27/2006 9:09:45 PM PST by GraniteStateDad
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To: Arec Barrwin
Damn you, Tony Romo! Damn you straight to hell! Do you have any idea what kind of damage you’ve done? Do you?

Who wrote this? Stewie Griffin?

34 posted on 11/27/2006 9:10:40 PM PST by Extremely Extreme Extremist (Why can't Republicans stand up to Democrats like they do to terrorists?)
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To: Arec Barrwin

"Alex, I'll take OVER-RATED NFL QUARTERBACKS for $500..."
"This popular NFL quarterback has been soundly upstaged by his understudy in 3 major football markets..."
"Alex, who is Drew Bledsoe?"
"You're absolutely right..."


35 posted on 11/27/2006 9:18:25 PM PST by GraniteStateDad (I can see it coming)
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To: Cyclopean Squid

"That is a great phrase. He probably won't be as flawless once Ds can study him and his tendencies, but he's got the skills to be a force for a long time to come.

I just like the storyline--the undrafted guy everyone wrote off and wouldn't give a chance. He fills in for a guy badly stumbling, everyone thinking the season is lost, and he heroically rescues the sinking ship. They never saw him coming. Believed a mediocrity, he proved himself a genius.

I'm going a bit over the top here but it's a theme throughout history. Octavian. Napoleon. Hitler. Stalin. Romo. Cyclopean Squid?"

Hey Bettis had is story book jerk fest last year, why not T Ro!


36 posted on 11/27/2006 11:57:09 PM PST by neb52
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To: GraniteStateDad

Eli Manning is praying that Drew Bledsoe gets traded to the Giants. After a few weeks of Bledsoe, Coughlin will bench him and Eli will emerge as a superstar.


37 posted on 11/28/2006 2:12:44 AM PST by SamAdams76 (Fish of an uncertain nature)
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To: SamAdams76
I am curious if Donovan "I am Hurt Again" McNabb is going to be the next Bledsoe? I haven't paid attention to the Dreaded and Feared's draft's this past year, so I didn't know if they had a young Quarterback in the waiting. McNabb isn't getting any younger and other then one year, he doesn't seem able to make it through a whole season.
38 posted on 11/28/2006 4:12:26 AM PST by neb52
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To: neb52

T Ro. I like that.


BTW, GO COWBOYS!!!!!


39 posted on 11/28/2006 8:08:36 PM PST by NCC-1701 (To boldly go where no FReeper has gone before. Live long and prosper.)
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