The Official Friday Silliness Thread Salutes Nostalgia

Now some may not think this is funny. But my quirky sense of humor has me laughing at this, and that's why I'm posting on the Silliness Thread. Below is are 3 job listings in the DNC.

YOUNG DEMOCRATS OF AMERICA

Position: Executive Director

Salary + Benefits: $65,000-$80,000 annually, fully covered health/dental/vision insurance, reimbursement for cell phone and attendance to at least one conference/professional development opportunity.

Job Description: The Executive Director is accountable to and is selected by the Board of Directors. The Executive Director is the Chief Executive Officer and general manager of the Young Democrats of America and shall be responsible for the employment and direction of staff to advance the objectives of YDA in coordination with the activities of the members, shall report from time to time to the Board on the activities of the organization and its financial condition, and shall have such other duties as are prescribed from time to time by the Board.

YDA is continuing the transition from an all volunteer structure to a joint staff and volunteer structure,. In the past two years, YDA has led the youth voting field with the creation of the Alliance peer-to-peer campaign program. The Executive Director is a critical piece in YDA’s next stage of organizational and programmatic development as well as the continuation of the new programs and major fundraising programs in place.

Job duties include, but are not limited to:

Management of all National Staff and Consultants, including the Political Director, Chapter Building Director, Finance Director, Technology Director, and administrative staff.
Management of national office operations and state partnership programs including campaign and chapter building programs.

Management of the organization’s multi-million dollar annual budget.

Serving as the representative of the organization to the media, donors, and other organizations.

Qualifications: Ideal applicants will have the following experience, or similar qualifications.

At least 5 years experience in management of a membership based non-profit or political organization.

Experience raising and managing a budget of at least one million dollars.

Proven ability to work with members, donors and other stakeholders in managing a transition from volunteer based day-to-day operations to professionally staffed operation.

Experience working with volunteer board members to set goals and develop long term plans.

Experience with youth voting program and youth leadership programs.

Knowledge of affiliate/chapter based models.

To Apply: Qualified applicants must submit a resume, cover letter, three references, and a writing sample no later than December 15, 2006 electronically to edsearch@yda.org. Please do not call, or submit a hard copy of your materials.

Final hiring and start date is expected to fall between February and April, 2007.

Position: National Chapter Building Director

Salary + Benefits: $45,000 to $60,000 annually, fully covered health/dental/vision insurance, reimbursement for cell phone and attendance to at least one conference/professional development opportunity.

Job Description: The Chapter Building Director reports directly to the President and is part of the Chapter Revolution Team. The Director is responsible for working with state and local chapters to build the long-term infrastructure of the Young Democrats. Job duties include, but are not limited to:

Implementing a national grassroots chapter-building strategy.

Supervising state executive directors in collaboration with state leadership in implementing chapter building programs.

Build and maintain relationships with leaders of allied organizations for membership and visibility growth.

Work with volunteer state leaders where there is no state executive director to build an effective volunteer-driven chapter program.

Work with YDA national and state leadership to grow YDA.

Qualifications for Chapter Building Director: Applicants should have at least 3 years experience in Democratic campaign politics. Knowledge of YDA chapters or another membership based organization and its needs are a plus.

To Apply: Qualified applicants must submit a resume, cover letter, and three references no later than December 15, 2006 electronically to jobs@yda.org. Please do not call, or submit a hard copy of your materials.

Final hiring and start date is expected to fall in mid-January.

Position: National Technology Director

Salary: $42,000 to 50,000 annually.

Job Description: The Technology Director reports directly to the Executive Director and is part of the Operations Team. The Technology Director is responsible for the overall implementation of all online programs and online infrastructure including YDA’s membership tool “DEMopolis,” national website, online presence, voter file integration and outreach to the internet activist community. Job duties include, but are not limited to:

Implementing the DEMopolis tool and creating new ways to utilize the system to maximize both YDA national’s use of it as well as for our chapters.

Serving as the chief writer on the YDA blog and maximizing the blog capacity by inviting guest blogs, cross promotions, etc.

Working closely with all national state and state-based staff to ensure they are using the most effective and current technology.

Maintaining the YDA website and thinking of creative ways to keep the content fresh and up to date.

Developing an online network of traditional and nontraditional media contacts/journalists in order to push pressing issues and news releases.

Creating web buttons for online campaigns and various logos for meetings.

Assisting the Finance Director in writing and implementing creative small donor programs and emails.

Assisting the Executive Director in developing online trainings as well as printed manuals regarding various technology topics.

Maintaining YDA’s database and voter file and assist other national staff and state staff in utilizing the data.

Coordinating with other political and allied groups’, including America Votes, technology teams to integrate available online activist and community building tools as well as think of new ones that will benefit YDA.

Coordinating with other political and allied groups to create/participate in online campaigns (e.g. Stop the Raid on Student Aid, etc.).

Qualifications for Technology Director: Applicants should have at least 4 years experience in technology and political environments. Knowledge of YDA chapters or another membership based organization and its needs are considered a plus.

To Apply: Qualified applicants must submit a resume, cover letter, and three references no later than December 15, 2006 electronically to jobs@yda.org. Please do not call, or submit a hard copy of your materials.

Final hiring and start date is expected to fall between February and April, 2007.

© Paid for by Young Democrats of America and not authorized by any candidate or candidate’s committee

Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired. Mrs. Fenton insists that he go with her to Walmart. He gets bored with all the shopping. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse. Here's a letter sent to her from the store.

Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment.
All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below. Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares... and watched what happened.

5. Aug 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. Sept 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Sept 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. Sept 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. Oct 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.

10. Nov 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where to find the antidepressants.

11. Dec 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. Dec 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Dec 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. Dec 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

And last, but not least ...

15. Dec 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here !

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