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Drunken elk terrorises schoolkids[Sweden]
The Local ^ | 10 Nov 2006 | Paul O'Mahony

Posted on 11/10/2006 6:32:46 PM PST by FLOutdoorsman

An angry elk is terrorising kids at a school in Gothenburg. The animal has been skulking around the school for days and is "completely crazy", according to staff. It may also be very drunk.

This morning the king of the forest lay dozing at the entrance to the school. When the elk finally got up and moved aside pupils at the school were still afraid to pass and had to be led in by their teachers.

"The children are terrified," school secretary Camilla Andersson told Göteborgs-Posten

Yesterday the elk was so aggressive that the headmaster, Lars Clemensson, felt compelled to call the police.

"We believe that the apple trees in the gardens have a part to play in this," said police commander Jan Caiman.

"It was probably the apples that lured the elk over there in the first place. That could be the root of the problem.

"We may be dealing with an alco-elk," he said.

Drunken elks are common enough at the end of the autumn season. The fallen apples have fermented slightly, and a bull elk can put away enough of them to start a good party.

"If it doesn't start taking it easy we'll eventually have to put it down," said Caiman.

But the commander would prefer wait a while longer in the hope that nature will soon put a stop to the drunken folly.

"Preferably a few frosty nights to make the apples disappeared," he said.

The hardened policeman has seen it all before. He recalls a scene he witnessed a few years ago.

"A home-owner had raked up a big pile of plums. In the middle of the pile lay a one year old calf. It was absolutely plastered," said Caiman.

But the police officers bided their time.

"After a while it came to its senses and scooted off," said Caiman.


TOPICS: Cheese, Moose, Sister; Local News; Pets/Animals
KEYWORDS: elk; sweden
"Drunken elks are common enough at the end of the autumn season. The fallen apples have fermented slightly, and a bull elk can put away enough of them to start a good party."

Awesome. Nothing like a Stag Party.

Just something to lighten the mood.

1 posted on 11/10/2006 6:32:46 PM PST by FLOutdoorsman
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To: FLOutdoorsman
Rotten fruit on the ground can ferment enough to cause drunkenness?

It's a damn good thing I didn't know about this back in high school.

2 posted on 11/10/2006 6:36:26 PM PST by SIDENET (Everybody was kung-fu fighting)
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To: WesternCulture

Anywhere near you in Gothenburg?


3 posted on 11/10/2006 6:36:33 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (I was just in Gothenburg in August but didn't see any drunken elk.)
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To: FLOutdoorsman

"Elk" is the European term for moose. Autumn is moose mating season, when they really do act crazy, even when not drunk.


4 posted on 11/10/2006 6:36:36 PM PST by hellbender
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To: SIDENET

I must confess to killing many drunken birds while they were eating from mulberry trees.


5 posted on 11/10/2006 6:37:24 PM PST by FLOutdoorsman (Exodus 18:21)
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To: Charles Henrickson; franksolich

KO!

6 posted on 11/10/2006 7:15:57 PM PST by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: FLOutdoorsman

A moose but my sister once?


7 posted on 11/10/2006 7:19:00 PM PST by Professional Engineer (Speel check? What for? It'll just become part of the FReeper lexicon.)
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To: FLOutdoorsman
It could have been worse.

Sex-Starved Moose Defecates on Car

8 posted on 11/10/2006 8:09:10 PM PST by RichInOC (...somebody was going to post it...why not me?)
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To: SIDENET
In the Serengheti, when it rains a bit ''too late'' for that delicate desert's ecosystem, various fruit fall from trees and ferment in the hot, moist air.

And you have never seen anything more hilarious than a giraffe who has eaten a bunch of these fruit and who is blitzed out of his (her?) gourd. Mack Sennett had NOTHING on this.

9 posted on 11/10/2006 10:18:40 PM PST by SAJ (debunking myths about markets and prices on FR since 2001)
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To: SIDENET

See #9. (g!)


10 posted on 11/10/2006 10:19:33 PM PST by SAJ (debunking myths about markets and prices on FR since 2001)
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