Posted on 07/29/2006 8:31:52 PM PDT by se_ohio_young_conservative
Ok, I want to propose. I dont know how to go about a ring. I want something cheap but nice. She is the nicest, most understanding woman on the planet, but I dont want to look like a cheapskate. I am not that rich. going into my life savings for this. any freepers have any advice.
I would like to propose on Canadian thankgiving in Oct. She lives in Toronto. plan to be moved in with her by Christmas *smile*
Plus you can't lose them down the garbage disposal.
Marry a Russian girl. They don't believe in engagement rings. I tried explaining the concept of an engagement ring to my Ukrainian wife and she didn't have a clue what I was talking about!
Just kidding of course! The jewelry business traditionally advises spending 2 months' salary.
Go here for some interesting info: Engagement Ring Etiquette
I'm the wrong person to ask. I was engaged at 24 and that blew up in my face. You need to have a little mileage on you to understand what it's all about, more so for guys. I'm still trying to position myself financially so I can afford a family without killing myself.
Congratulations. Love is a wonderful thing.
I have a friend whose boyfriend surprised her with a very inexpensive cubic zirconium ring. Later they shopped for the 'real' ring, one that they both liked and both felt they could afford. She cherishes the first ring and the memory it provided.
Shopping together is a good way to find out if you have similar values about money. She might want to get a smaller ring now with the thought of getting a larger one as you get more firmly established financially.
If she opts for the 3-carat ring, be careful!
My engagement ring was a piece of lavender jade. The fact that he knew me well to pick something he knew I would love rather then going for a generic diamond made it extremely special.
But you offered the opinion that he was too young.
I'm of the belief that if a couple is *truly* mature enough and has a forward-vision and will work together to make their life wonderful, then as young as 20-21 is not too young, imo.
I know couples that married while young (20) and 10 years later they have great marriages. On the flip side, I know couples who married at 30 or older who aren't doing so well.
People who married in the 1940's and 50's most often did so while young. My parents as well as my husband's parents.
All in all, it depends on the couple. imo. :o)
btw, I'm sorry things didn't work out for you. At the right time, with the right lady, it will be lovely. :o)
I second HTB's suggestion. Don't be a slave to DeBeers' marketing - get her what SHE will like and want to wear, within your budget, of course.
My engagement ring was a blue topaz with three very small diamonds in a curved yellow-gold band. Later, my husband got me a matching pendant. I get compliments on both pieces when I wear them, almost 20 years later.
GREAT suggestion!
Thanks! My husband's coworkers are always stuned because I don't want jewelry on every marketing-opportunity-occasion. My 40th birthday was last weekend, and his "gift" to me was taking our #2 Son to camp for 4 days. Then, since that was free :-), he bought me new running shoes yesterday.
I have a couple of used ones...
(JUST KIDDING!!!!)
Life begins at 40... just ask Elvis!
I appreciate that.
Dr. Laura says after 28 and that might be a good rule of thumb. In today's world, the divorce rate is high when marrying young.
Kind of interesting so I'll go on. Do you think(talking generally here) that marriages work better/less/no effect when both are the same age? I think the guy needs to be older(seasoned) to be a good provider. A lot is expected from the man and he will benefit from some "sowing of oats"(personally and professionally) while the same is not true of the woman.
LOL! As the tagline says :
As for engagement rings, we shopped together and found a beautiful ring w/in his budget. Since then (18 years) we had the ring re-designed as an eternity ring. Now I don't snag it on everything I come in contact with.
Great gift! I've been asking for a larger garden, but we'd have to rent a high-powered tiller :-).
I don't wear my rings much, except my plain wedding band, because of the diapers. My "good" jewelry is put away for once-a-year occasions, until we're out of the baby phase.
I don't know the stats on that, but can say there *are* people who marry young *and* older who don't take their vows seriously.
***Kind of interesting so I'll go on. Do you think(talking generally here) that marriages work better/less/no effect when both are the same age? I think the guy needs to be older(seasoned) to be a good provider.***
How about working together? Being poor as paupers but working together to make a precious life together? My husband and I were both 30 when we married. We both had great jobs, homes, etc. But...we say now that we would have much preferred to have married younger and worked toward what we had at that time. Clear as mud?
***A lot is expected from the man and he will benefit from some "sowing of oats"(personally and professionally) while the same is not true of the woman.***
How about experiencing excellent intimacy together ... learning and experimenting together rather than practicing on other women to become proficient enough for your future wife...?! What a precious and incredibly exciting gift to give each other!
20 is too young to get married ? are you on mars ?
but seriously. I have debated all of this in my mind. I will probably continue to do so. while I know what is working against us, at the same time, I believe I am mature enough and ready to commit.
Would have been for me. I can't judge in your case, so I'll just wish you all the best. Marriage improves a man, in my opinion, but it can be hard work.
I'm not talking about "practicing on other women". I mean a guy needs to find out what he likes and doesn't like. Why, because I believe nature's role for him is of provider. And when that isn't being played out, things go arye. Personally, I desire a woman who is motivated on running the family day to day. A huge job that I don't have the temperament for. I'll make the cash, she makes herself and others happy.
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