"Now that's CREEPY!
Posted on 06/18/2006 12:22:20 PM PDT by West Coast Conservative
Cindy the dolphin gained fame after 41-year-old Jewish millionaire from London married him in 2005; 'Cindy swam slowly and he had problems eating,' reef employee says
Cindy the dolphin, the head of a pack of dolphins at the Eilat Reef, and father of all the dolphins born in the area, died Sunday and was buried at sea.
The dolphin's body was discovered Sunday morning by reef workers floating in its favorite place – the entrance of the diving and swimming instructors. Reef workers put Cindy's body in a boat and sailed into the sea, where they departed from it.
"We felt this was the end for three weeks," said Maya Zilber, who is a manager at the reef's training center. "Cindy swam slowly and he had problems eating. Sometimes he didn't eat at all. He vomited and did not look good," said Maya.
Cindy gained fame after marrying Sharon Tendler, a 41-year-old Jewish millionaire from London in December 2005. Tendler wore a white dress and placed flowers on her head.
Cindy, escorted by his fellow best-men dolphins, swam over to Tendler and she hugged him, whispered sweet nothings in his ear, and kissed him in front of the cheering crowd.
After the ceremony was sealed with some mackerels, Tendler was tossed into the water by her friends so that she could swim with her new husband.
"I'm the happiest girl on earth," the bride said as she chocked back tears of emotion. "I made a dream come true, and I am not a pervert," she stressed.
Cindy was the largest dolphin on the reef. He was over 2.5 meters (8.2 feet) and weighed over 250 kilograms (551 pounds). Despite his massive size, Zilber said that Cindy "still had battles with other males."
"But these are natural wars. If there would not have been wars between the males, we would be worried," she added.
Reef employees estimate that Cindy, short for Cinderella, was 40-years-old at the time of his death.
I could do that when I was 17.
It was a male with an Orca.
Mark
Nicely done. ;)
ROFLOL!!!!
um, okay.
Is this sanctioned by the Talmud somewhere? :-)
No, but they were both divers.
Are we even sure that this "Cindy the Dolphin" possessed a male p...., er, organ?!
I don't know if you've checked the scriptorium lately, but they have the memo Matt Stone sent to the MPAA regarding cuts to SP:BLU. It's pretty profane and hilarious.
I saw it! I didn't post it here for obvious reasons. :)
Me too when if I folded it in half!
Lyrics:
It was April the forty-first
Being a quadruple leap year
I was driving in downtown Atlantis
My barracuda was in the shop
So I was in a rented stingray
And it was overheating
So I pulled into a Shell Station
They said I'd blown a seal
I said, "Fix the damn thing
And leave my private life out of it
Okay pal?"
While they were doing that
I walked over to a place called the Oyster Bar, a real dive
But I knew the owner
He used to play for the Dolphins
I said "Hi Gil"
You have to yell, he's hard of herring
Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream
Gil was also down on his luck
Fact is he was barely keeping his head below water
I bellied up to the sandbar
He poured me the usual
Rusty snail, hold the grunion
Shaken not stirred
With a peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side
Heavy on the mako
I slipped him a fin
On porpoise
I was feeling good
I even dropped a sand dollar in the box for Jerry's squids
For the halibut
Well the place was crowded
We were packed in like sardines They were all there to listen to the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal
What sole
Tommy was rockin' the place with a very popular tuna
Salmon Chanted Evening
And the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers
Probably there to see the bass player
One of them was this cute little yellowtail
And she's giving me the eye
So I figured this is my chance for a little fun
You know, piece of Pisces
But she said things I just couldn't fathom
She was too deep, seemed to be under a lot of pressure
Boy, could she drink
She drank like a . . .
She drank a lot
I said "What's your sign"
She said "Aquarium"
I said "Great, let's get tanked"
Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream
I invited her to my place for a midnight bait
I said "Come on baby, it'll only take a few minnows"
She threw me that same old line
"Not tonight, I gotta haddock"
And she wasn't kidding either
Cause in came the biggest, meanest looking haddock
I'd ever seen come down the pike
He was covered with mussels
He came over to me and said
"Listen, shrimp, don't you come trollin' around here"
What a crab
This guy was steamed
I could see the anchor in his eyes
I turned to him, I said
"A-balone, you're just being shellfish"
Well, I knew it was going to be trouble and so did Gil
‘Cause he was already on the phone to the cods
The haddock hits me with a sucker punch
I catch him with a left hook
He eels over
It was a fluke but there he was
Lying on the deck, flat as a mackerel
Kelpless
I said "Forget the cods Gil
This guy's gonna need a sturgeon"
Well, the yellowtail was impressed with the way I landed her boyfriend
She came over to me, she said
"Hey, big boy, you're really a game fish
What's your name"
I said "Marlin"
Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream
Well, from then on we had a whale of a time
I took her to dinner, I took her to dance
I bought her a bouquet of flounders
And then I went home with her
And what did I get for my trouble
A case of the clams
Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet Dream is the sixth (6th) song on Disc 1 of the Dr. Demento's 20th Anniversary compilation album. It is an original song by Kip Addotta.
http://www.com-www.com/musiclyrics/addottakip-wetdream.html
And I thought I was the only one who understood these pearls of wisdom. Two words to you, my friend:
Hurry! Before it's too late!
This is an example of what a joke marriage can become if we don't have a constitutional amendment defining it between a man and a woman.
Weren't they married longer than Brittney? I think that marriage is just a joke period lately. I can't believe that people can't stay married today. It is disgusting how divorce has become so easy. I am married over ten years. My entire family has never had a divorce. Both sets of grandparents were married over 50 years, parents are at 39 years currently, my sister and brother in-law and me and my wife are at 10 years, and my brother and his wife are at 7 years. (all first marriages for everyone). Why is it so hard to stay married? I guess I don't get it.
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