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Sodom-on-the-Hudson Chicks: The Does Anyone Remember Molly Seidel or Emily Erwin?
none ^ | 5-26-06 | Dangus

Posted on 05/26/2006 7:28:02 PM PDT by dangus

Long, Long ago, in a pickup truck far, far away, Molly Seidel and Emily Erwin were just two rather talented, Southern musicians. Then, like the Little Rascals' remake of "Faust," (or, "Damned Yankees,") Natalie Maines was plunked in their midst.

Ms. Maines is a short, stubby woman of no obvious talent or beauty. But her rock-and-roll attitude was just the twist that the Dixie Chicks needed to differentiate themselves from the kind of passable bluegrass music that is most useful for the background music of a Ken Burns documentary. Up through 2002, with the exception of "Landslide," the Dixie Chicks' style remained solidly bluegrass.

If ever there was a song that highlighted Natalie's shortcomings, it was the remake of Fleetwood Mac's "Landslide." Molly and Emily did a fine job performing "Landslide" as a bluegrass song, but the song's innate musicality belongs more to Berkeley than Birmingham.

Emily's pregnancy would've fit into a true Dixie video just fine; but Berkley women don't reproduce; they just worship Gaia, so there was no reconciling the imagery. The result was a four-minute long eau-de-Toilette commercial. Emily's very pregnant appearance made her look like something out of an Anne Gedes photoshoot, and made Natalie look like something out of "Bride of Chucky." And Natalie's singing made Stevie Nicks sound good, which is pretty bad since Stevie sounds a lot like Katherine Hepburn accepting her lifetime achievement Oscar.

Nonetheless, songs like "Long Time Gone" were radio-friendly enough to make a huge hit out of the album. Her anti-war comments came as the country audience was just about wearing thin, but brought in a whole new audience: the DailyKOS / Democratic Underground / Move On crowd, who didn't know what good bluegrass sounded like.

As much as they'd like to claim victimhood, the country crowd always knew the Dixie Chicks were liberals. And they didn't care until the Dixie Chicks slammed their commander-in-chief on foreign soil during a time of war. Rather than apologize, the Dixie Chicks proclaimed their freedom of speech and bitterly denounced how horrible it was that people exercise their freedom of speech to criticize the Dixie Chicks.

Quite unjustly, Natalie became the center of attention, but the Chicks caught on among an audience which is otherwise shocked and offended by the use of the word "chick," and whose only previous exposure to country music was K.D. Lang.

But what Hell Molly and Emily must be in now! Trying desperately to pump up album sales so as to get Natalie's "message" heard, the record company has thrown an incredibly lavish production behind Natalie: a gospel choir for backup, a full symphony orchestra for accompaniment, and a slew of songwriters and producers to give her something to sing. All of which leaves Molly and Emily about as useful as Stevie Nicks during a Lindsay Buckingham song. Even the video comes off looking like the pretty (Ok, passable) girls defending the ugly girl from schoolyard taunts.

If there was any question of the recording industry's leftism, would someone please explain the fortune invested into spreading Ms. Maines' new gospel? After all, that's left of the Chicks is Maines' weak voice, almost drowned out by over-production. Granted, there have been Pop acts that don't display any more talent, but then Brittney Spears doesn't look like Murphy Brown's 63-year-old face superimposed onto Uncle Fester's body. Yet.

Poor Molly and Emily. Other people are now telling them what to sing, what to wear, what (not) to play. But at least they have their artistic freedom.


TOPICS: Humor; Music/Entertainment
KEYWORDS: dangus; dixiechicks
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To: dangus
In the "after" picture, comparisons to ugly men are unsettling. Natalie looks like Willem Dafoe and -- with a haircut and dye job -- Emily looks too much like Edward Norton.

Luckily for Martie, her curse is that she is a twin for John Kerry's daughter who wore the see-through dress at Cannes. She is not as harshly unattractive as the other two in this publicity photo.

Happy does wonders for a person's appearance. It seems that all we're going to see from these gals is a lot of bitter and ugly.

41 posted on 05/28/2006 8:57:47 AM PDT by Ghengis (Alexander was a wuss!)
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To: Hildy
They were the top selling country record of 2003 and had the top grossing tour. But all those people weren't as smart as you. OK.

Come on, that's not fair! Are you claiming that you've liked every popular act, or that every popular act is good, or that intelliegnce is demonstrated by taste in music? Many people smarter than me liked the Dixie Chicks, probably including you. But so what? Being smarter doesn't make someone right. Jimmy Carter... enough said.

If you look at what I said, I agreed with you that Natalie had a good voice and that she provided the impetus for their popularity. I even went further than you and gave another reason for their popularity at the time--- I said I thought she was hot!

That's a LOT of positive stuff to've said about them given the nature of the thread! Even YOU didn't srespond to people saying Maines was an ugly pig!

But yes, taking all of that into consideration, I do still think they suck. I was always annoyed when they were presented as "real country" as opposed to singers I actually liked like Garth Brooks who were supposed to be "fakes" and their homey, overdone "it's-just-little-old-us" style also always annoyed me. I was completely unsurprised when they came out as leftists becuase the tone of their songs was always in that Peter, Paul and Mary kind of mold. So, just as Time Magazine feels the country has caught up to them, I feel conservatives have finally caught up to me. Now, if Sean Hannity would get rid of that nonsensical anti-male "Let the Right be Wrong" song, I'll be happy. But--- to each their own!

42 posted on 05/28/2006 8:59:10 AM PDT by mjolnir ("All great change in America begins at the dinner table.")
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To: mjolnir

I'm just tired of people coming on FR and diminishing the talent of people they disagree with. I GET IT that you don't think they're that good. OK...SO WHAT? And you'd be surprised how many Country stars are leftists. They're just smart enough not to talk about it.

The problem is you're still stuck in the REAL vs. NEW COUNTRY mindset. Well, the new Country is making gobs of money so new country will be considered REAL country. But again, what's the difference..listen to what you want. Obviously their music isn't up to your standards, but for the rest of us who don't really take it all that seriously, they were pretty damn good.


43 posted on 05/28/2006 9:04:40 AM PDT by Hildy ("Whenever someone smiles at me all I see is a chimpanzee begging for its life." - Dwight Schrute)
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To: Ghengis
After a secod look, I think I reversed Martie and Emily.

Hmmm...I guess two interchangable bookends in the background is how most of us look at Martie and Emily when supporting Natalie.

44 posted on 05/28/2006 9:05:01 AM PDT by Ghengis (Alexander was a wuss!)
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To: MarkL; dangus; Guenevere

MarkL, I sure agree with you on Emily. Back when she was a blonde, there was never on this earth a woman less in need of plastic surgery!

But real soon after they hit it big, the blonde Emily went away, and for me that was a big sign of trouble for the quality of that group. The hair color change was the warning siren for things to come!

Ah, yes, I bought the packaging! You bet!


45 posted on 05/28/2006 9:23:19 AM PDT by Museum Twenty (Proudly supporting President George W. Bush - Proudly shouting "Rumsfeld '08!")
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To: Hildy
And you'd be surprised how many Country stars are leftists. They're just smart enough not to talk about it.

The problem is you're still stuck in the REAL vs. NEW COUNTRY mindset. Well, the new Country is making gobs of money so new country will be considered REAL country. But again, what's the difference..listen to what you want. Obviously their music isn't up to your standards, but for the rest of us who don't really take it all that seriously, they were pretty damn good.

Hey, I like a lot of groups and singers who don't have political views I respect. For instance, Metallica says these days that they're ashamed of their patriotic song "Don't Tread On Me". Well, too bad for them--- they already made it and I already like it. And I know tons of country stars are leftists-- that's why it annoys me when Hannity acts like that isn't the case and Country is supposed to be just-oh-so-different than other genres.

I didn't think I was taking them too seriously. Aren't there any groups you don't like? Don't you ever talk about that? Besides, weren't the Dixie Chicks supposed to be "real Country" and Shania Twian and the more pop style stars "new"? You're absolutely right a lot of people like a lot of music I don't like. That I have an opinion doesn't mean I think my opinion reigns supreme over all of those that disagree with it. I don't claim to be a country music expert or any kind of expert. To me, "Freedom Costs a Buck O'Five" is a good country song, at least for most of it.

The Dixie Chicks must have done something right to inspire so much passion in you. Maybe I'll check out one of their albums again.

46 posted on 05/28/2006 9:32:31 AM PDT by mjolnir ("All great change in America begins at the dinner table.")
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To: mjolnir
LOL! You know, honestly I really don't care that much about the Chicks' music. I find it so incredible how they keep sabotoging their own careers. It's actually fun to watch. I got a kick out of the lyrics of their new song, NOT READY TO MAKE NICE...

First she says,

I made my bed and I sleep like a baby
With no regrets and I don’t mind sayin’

I know you said
Can’t you just get over it
It turned my whole world around
And I kind of like it

Then, this:

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I’m not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I’m still waiting

It doesn't make any sense!!!!

47 posted on 05/28/2006 9:44:01 AM PDT by Hildy ("Whenever someone smiles at me all I see is a chimpanzee begging for its life." - Dwight Schrute)
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To: dangus
Emily's pregnancy would've fit into a true Dixie video just fine; but Berkley women don't reproduce; they just worship Gaia, so there was no reconciling the imagery. The result was a four-minute long eau-de-Toilette commercial. Emily's very pregnant appearance made her look like something out of an Anne Gedes photoshoot, and made Natalie look like something out of "Bride of Chucky." And Natalie's singing made Stevie Nicks sound good, which is pretty bad since Stevie sounds a lot like Katherine Hepburn accepting her lifetime achievement Oscar.

ROTFLMAO! I love it!

48 posted on 05/29/2006 12:04:40 AM PDT by I got the rope
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To: Hildy
The problem is you're still stuck in the REAL vs. NEW COUNTRY mindset.

New Country is what used to be called rock n roll...just sung with a southern accent.
49 posted on 05/29/2006 12:12:29 AM PDT by Old_Mil (http://www.constitutionparty.org - Forging a Rebirth of Freedom.)
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To: I got the rope

Thanks... I was wondering if anyone would follow the link from the Da Vinci column... and I was kinda wondering if anyone had seen the video so they would get that paragraph; it's my personal favorite, but I also knew it required the most familiarity.


50 posted on 05/29/2006 12:19:57 AM PDT by dangus
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To: mjolnir; Hildy

Just for the record, again... I thought that there previous album was pretty good, and that Martie and Emily were fairly talented, and that Natalie had been just the twist that the band needed to make it big... Hence, the reference to the Little Rascal's remake of Faust.

By the way, did anyone get that line? That episode always stuck in my head like the (now named) Michigan J. Frog episode of Looney Toons, or the "One Lumps or Two...? D'oh, three or four" episode of Woody Woodpecker and the Alligator. But a few of my local friends critiqued it as being an un-"gettable" reference.


51 posted on 05/29/2006 12:44:10 AM PDT by dangus
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To: Old_Mil
New Country is what used to be called rock n roll...just sung with a southern accent.

Yikes, don't tell these guys that...

Same category as "The Traitor Chicks?" Ronnie Van Zant just hit 3K RPMs...

; )

52 posted on 05/29/2006 4:42:38 AM PDT by Caipirabob (Communists... Socialists... Democrats...Traitors... Who can tell the difference?)
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To: dangus; Hildy
By the way, did anyone get that line? That episode always stuck in my head like the (now named) Michigan J. Frog episode of Looney Toons, or the "One Lumps or Two...? D'oh, three or four" episode of Woody Woodpecker and the Alligator. But a few of my local friends critiqued it as being an un-"gettable" reference.

Well, I get it now! Those were great cartoons!!

The lyrics to the Dixie Chicks "apology" "Not Ready to Make Nice" are very...words fail me! I think the pop music business, by which I mean whatever music gets a lot of airplay, missed the boat when in the wake of the Beatles it started phasing out songwriters. I used to read comic books, and the same thing happened there--- the pencillers and inkers of the comics became the writers, because, like pop/country/rock singers today, they don't feel like real "creative" artists unless they are authors, too. But by that standard, Sinatra wouldn't be an artist.. If so, then so much the worse for being an artist.

53 posted on 05/29/2006 5:40:40 AM PDT by mjolnir ("All great change in America begins at the dinner table.")
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To: Hildy

I agree with you, except for where you claim natalie has a "great voice". I particularly agree with you that I have more talent in my little finger, than maines has in her entire being.

I actually prefer Stevie Nix over maines any day... and she is not a "great vocalist".

LLS


54 posted on 05/29/2006 7:20:52 AM PDT by LibLieSlayer (Preserve America... kill terrorists... destroy dims!)
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To: dangus
"One Lumps or Two...? D'oh, three or four" episode of Woody Woodpecker and the Alligator."
That bit was Bugs Bunny and Pete Puma.
55 posted on 05/29/2006 8:12:55 AM PDT by g.i.joe
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To: Caipirabob
Its true. Lynyrd Skynyrd and The Eagles would be 'country' today. Travis Tritt would be country rock 30-35 years ago. Garth Brooks and Tim McGraw would be competing for insipid '70s version of Neil Sedaka market.

FTR, I like Lynyrd Skynyrd and Travis Tritt.

56 posted on 05/29/2006 8:32:00 AM PDT by Ghengis (Alexander was a wuss!)
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To: Ghengis

Meant to say, Travis Tritt would have been southern rock 30-35 years ago.


57 posted on 05/29/2006 8:43:28 AM PDT by Ghengis (Alexander was a wuss!)
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To: dangus

Not ambiguous. Just misspelled.

It's Berklee College of Music, named after the son of the founder of the school, Lee Berk.


58 posted on 05/29/2006 8:48:10 AM PDT by ladyjane
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To: dangus
If there was any question of the recording industry's leftism, would someone please explain the fortune invested into spreading Ms. Maines' new gospel?

That's what I've been saying. There has been some serious cash invested in promoting these girls 24/7. Even if the album out sells Michael Jackson's "Thriller," it will never recoup the costs!

59 posted on 05/29/2006 8:52:15 AM PDT by Cowboy Bob (Liberalism in a parasite that ALWAYS kills its host.)
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To: Ghengis

When I'm in the mood for country I just stick to Hank Williams,George Jones,Roy Acuff,and...DAVID ALLEN COE! After all, he does sing the perfect country and western song,LOL.

I HATE "new country",there's nothing country about it. And it all sounds alike to me.


60 posted on 05/29/2006 9:06:51 AM PDT by mrsmel (Men possess talent. Genius possesses men.)
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