> > > >Posted on 04/28/2006 3:59:06 PM PDT by pcottraux
> > > >Hello, hello, hello, everybody!!! Welcome to this week’s awesomely spectacular SINGLES THREAD (so awesome, I had to capitalize it), hosted by pcottraux and ilovew!!!
But enough chit chat. Let’s start tripping the light fantastic!!!
Of course, without a few tunes going on, dancing would just be a bad “a cappella” rip off.
Do the Monkey With Me!
Come on!!!
And now to get the ball rolling:
Hey, how'd you like to watch the show in 3-D, sweet thing?
Say there, pretty air mama, didn't you see me in your dreams last night?
Hey babearilla, that a pretty eensie-weensie, teeny-weenie polka-dot thingy you got going there.
Come and get it, ladies. I'm yours for the takin'!
Hey there, cutie pants!
Hey all you hot mamas. Wanna talk to a steamin' hunk of cyber fella?
Hey there, cutie pants. Am I as studly as the Statue of David, or what?
Oh, baby! I'm going to make your dreams come true!
Hya! Dreamy hunk, right here!
You wanna frisk me?
Wanna get lost with me (whoosh)?
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, let's roll in the hay.
I'm gonna say, 'Hey hot mama, wanna go back to my place for a game of Twister?
Lady: "How many times do I have to tell you I have a boyfriend?!" Johnny: "Well, you look like the kind of girl that could use two."
I bet your name's Mickey, 'cause you're so fine. You're so fine...
Hey there, foxy hygiene girl. (whoosh) I love a babe with minty breath.
All right. I guess that makes me the object of desire, huh baby?
Johnny: "Excuse me, miss." Lady: "(gasp!)" Johnny: "How'd you like to paint the town red with a happenin' hipster?"
Pardon me, hot sexy mama. If you'd please to take a look at my, (whoosh) Hya, studly bod, (whoosh), then I may have the pleasure of you wanting to be my number-one main squeeze.
Hey there, miss. I'm Johnny B. Wanna spend the day with me?
Whoa. Man, you're pretty!
Hey there, Spanish seniorita. Sprechen se love?
Hey there, smart mama.
You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
Say, how 'bout you and me sharin' a soda right now?
You're steamin' baby! You too. And you. And you, pretty man. Oh man, time flies when you're having fun.
Hello, teen hotline. You're boyfriend left ya'? Why, what are you wearin'?
Wanna do the monkey with me?
So, are we having fun yet? What am I saying…of course we are!!!
AND THE FUN IS JUST GETTING STARTED!!!
Let’s make it a weekend to remember!!!
Found it!
Is anyone watching the White House Correspondents Dinner on C-SPAN? I know it sounds dry, but they have W doing a comedy routine with his look-alike alter ego. It's hilarious!
Well, okay.
First thing, I got there and didn't know what to do. So I wondered around looking for the manager for a while before I found him. He took me to the front office and I had to watch three lame-o cheap training videos.
Then he took me to the back and I spent about an hour filling out paper work.
Then he got the department head to take me all over the place and show me where everything was. Then she went on break for a half hour while I walked around studying the place. Then I took my break, naturally.
I spent most of the day after that doing some work with her. At one point, the Asst. Manager took me back to his office and gave me a HORRIFICALLY mind-numbing lesson about all the complicated technical aspects of the job. And he also made sure he really got all the rules into my head (I'm not breaking any rules...he's a guy who's bad side I wouldn't want to be on). I think you'd call it an "orientation."
After about another hour of training, I got to leave. It was about 3 then.
I really like the job. It will take some getting used to but I'm all over it.
Oh THAT GUY!!!! He's so funny!!!! He does the best Bush.
I'm watching it!!! It's SO funny!
Republicans, Democrats, and John McCain!
New jobs always take a lot of getting used to unless you are digging a hole or something like that.
New people can take even longer to get used to.
First impressions of people can be entirely wrong. Someone you think is real nice now can wind up stabbing you in the back down the road.
Trust no one but just get along with them if they will let you. They won't always let you.
Did you have to watch lame videos on sexual harassment and other PC stuff?
Congratulations. What will you be doing?
Sounds promising. I'm glad everything went okay except for the boring training stuff. *hugs* CONGRATULATIONS!!!
Okay Kiddies. I got grease ALL OVER THE PLACE now and need to shower, desperately, so I will be back in about 30 minutes or so.
That was a great line :)
No, none of that, thankfully.
One video on "Welcome to the company," one video on "Sales Associates" and a third on "The Back Room." Each one about ten minutes.
I guess they trust me not to sexually harrass people.
Tell me more about your job when I come back, okay? Will you be around?
Mostly shelf stocking and pricing. Nothing too big I guess.
Well thanks.
"The Back Room"--that sounds sinister.
When are you coming back?
In about 30 minutes...I'm a real mess. Will you be here?
I like their back room. It's big and full of stuff. No goofing off, though. The A.M.'s office is right there. Someone's watching you!
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