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One-night stands immoral, say 9 in 10 women
The Daily Telegraph ^ | March 31, 2006 | Nic Fleming

Posted on 03/30/2006 9:36:04 PM PST by MadIvan

Samantha of Sex and the City, it is fair to say, would not approve. The casual attitude to sexual relations embraced by the most liberated of the characters in the television series turns out not to reflect the views of 21st century women quite as well as widely imagined.

Researchers investigating female attitudes to sex and their sexuality were surprised to find that most women have rather more traditional, conservative views on one-night stands than they expected.

Around nine out of 10 of those questioned felt casual sex was immoral and that those women who engaged in it were not doing so primarily for pleasure.

They said they felt sorry for women who had one-night stands, that they were lacking something in their lives and if they had not simply lost control through drink and drugs they were seeking emotional rather than physical connection.

Dr Sharron Hinchcliffe, a psychologist from the University of Sheffield, presented her findings at the annual conference of the British Psychological Society in Cardiff yesterday.

Dr Hinchcliffe said: "Our results did not fit in with the image we have of today's independent woman who can go out and get sexual fulfilment without the ties of a relationship.

"There was a view that if women had one-night stands they were doing it for reasons other than their own pleasure, more out of a feeling of being desperate, needy or looking for something, or that they had lost control through drink or drugs.

"They said they did it for reasons that were different to those of women in relationships - which they said were for pleasure and to express their love for their partner. They defined it as deviant behaviour.

"They referred to the women as emulating male behaviour. It was certainly the view that it was not the way women should behave.

"Some of the respondents said these things even though they admitted they had had one-night stands themselves. I was surprised at how judgmental they were.

"It makes me question whether women have really gained all the sexual freedom they are supposed to have gained since the Sixties."

Dr Hinchcliffe and colleagues carried out in-depth interviews with 46 women selected from the electoral roll aged 23 to 83, with an average age of 48.

Around 10 per cent of the sample disagreed with the majority view of "no strings" sex as immoral. Dr Hinchcliffe said that if anything the women in their early thirties were more negative about one-night stands than those of women in their fifties.

Some of the participants also expressed concerns about women having casual sex exposing themselves to sexually transmitted disease.

A survey of 1,095 men and women carried out on behalf of Amnesty International UK and published in November found that more than a third of people believed a female rape victim was totally or partially responsible if she had behaved in a flirtatious manner with her attacker.

Dr Tuppy Owens, of the Sexual Freedom Coalition, a group that campaigns for sexual freedom between consenting adults, said: "I don't like the expression 'one-night stand'.

"Two people just banging away at each other can be pretty meaningless and an empty experience, unless there is some passion, care and feeling towards the other person. However, if you go out wondering what might happen, ready to give as well as receive, you might have the most wonderful adventure.

"Perhaps if they had asked the questions in a different way they would have got different answers."

Norman Wells, the director of Family and Youth Concern, said: "It shows that most women are seeking more than the fleeting gratification that temporary sexual relationships can offer.

"Sexual intimacy was never meant to be engaged in outside the context of lifelong union between one man and one woman.

"By divorcing sex from marriage in our thinking and in the sexual education given to children and young people, we are promoting something that runs contrary to our basic longings for stability, permanence and commitment."


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: ipw; moralabsolutes; morality; onenightstand; onenightstands; promiscuity; rwos; sex
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To: Hi Heels

Please see post 216.


221 posted on 03/31/2006 4:11:10 PM PST by TAdams8591 (President Bush's second term is undoing all the good he accomplished in his first term!)
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To: grjr21

Well there's a unbiased sample of the thoughts of American women -- girls on spring break. I bet if you took that same poll, say, where the college kids spend spring break on a mission trip to another country, you'd get an entirely different, albeit as biased, result.


222 posted on 03/31/2006 4:13:06 PM PST by Chanticleer (Let us speak courteously, deal fairly, and keep ourselves armed and ready. T. Roosevelt)
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To: TAdams8591

"However, it was the sexual revolution coupled with the feminist movement that so devastatingly changed relationships between men and women in my estimation".

We agree on that.

When women threw themselves into roles traditionally reseved for men it turned everything on its head.

The devil likes it when things are turned upside down.

Man and women both have their roles in life. They are different roles.

The Lord made men and women different for a reason. They are supposed to compliment each other, not compete against each other.


223 posted on 03/31/2006 4:13:16 PM PST by Supernatural (A 1,000 lies can be told, but the truth is still the truth.)
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To: red irish

Like the double-dipping analogy!


224 posted on 03/31/2006 4:16:43 PM PST by Chanticleer (Let us speak courteously, deal fairly, and keep ourselves armed and ready. T. Roosevelt)
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To: Supernatural
Man and women both have their roles in life. They are different roles.

I am thankful every day that some things have changed - so that I can get an education and work in an area that makes me happy. That wouldn't have been possible 100 years ago.

225 posted on 03/31/2006 4:17:59 PM PST by tuliptree76
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To: Chanticleer
May I ask something stupid??

35-50 years ago, what did kids do on spring break??? I know this hedonism by the GUYS and GIRLS BOTH has been going on since I was a teen, at least. Me and a friend of mine were all set to go on '91 when I had a major(around $500, IIRC) car repair bill that kept that from happening. probably a good thing, too I would had probably gotten into a lot of trouble.

But I AGREE, that the "spring break" crowd is NOT a good representation of "women today".
226 posted on 03/31/2006 4:18:14 PM PST by Rca2000 ("How can I tell you if something is "safe" if I don't know what you are referring to?")
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To: MadIvan

Hooray for the truth willing out.


227 posted on 03/31/2006 4:19:10 PM PST by GretchenM (What does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his soul? Please meet my friend, Jesus.)
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To: tuliptree76

But for every 1 good thing that feminism has done for women,(educational opportunities, fair pay for same job, etc) it has done 3 BAD things!!


228 posted on 03/31/2006 4:22:21 PM PST by Rca2000 ("How can I tell you if something is "safe" if I don't know what you are referring to?")
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To: Rca2000

I think it will turn around again. But not for a long time.


229 posted on 03/31/2006 4:23:20 PM PST by TAdams8591 (President Bush's second term is undoing all the good he accomplished in his first term!)
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To: Englishgarden; Conservative4Life

That was insane.. I can totally understand why he moved out :(


230 posted on 03/31/2006 4:23:36 PM PST by Trillian
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To: Rca2000

Even so, I'm thankful that I do have my educational and work opportunities.


231 posted on 03/31/2006 4:23:58 PM PST by tuliptree76
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To: tuliptree76

I am thankful for that too.

My purpose is not to attack women, but to try to figure out where we are and how we got there.

I grew up in a different era where the man made enough money at his job so that the woman didn't have to work.

Things have changed. Both now have to work to make ends meet.

Necessity is the mother of invention.


232 posted on 03/31/2006 4:24:26 PM PST by Supernatural (A 1,000 lies can be told, but the truth is still the truth.)
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Comment #233 Removed by Moderator

To: Supernatural
"They are supposed to compliment each other, not compete against each other."

Agreed.

234 posted on 03/31/2006 4:25:46 PM PST by TAdams8591 (President Bush's second term is undoing all the good he accomplished in his first term!)
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To: TAdams8591; Supernatural

"They are supposed to compliment each other, not compete against each other."



Hey, you look great. Have you been working out?
Nice suit, it fits you perfectly.
What a great tan you have. Not everyone tans like that.
You're about the smartest person I know.


235 posted on 03/31/2006 4:30:12 PM PST by durasell (!)
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To: Englishgarden
"It would take a few nuclear wars and the obliteration of all literature in paper and electronic form to bring back that society outside of the Muslim world. Of course, the Muslim world still fits the bill for what you described."

It will take a lot and a long time, I agree. But there will be a day when people realize the destruction caused by the sexual revolution was too high a price to pay. But probably not in most our life times and hopefully before we self-destruct.

236 posted on 03/31/2006 4:30:39 PM PST by TAdams8591 (President Bush's second term is undoing all the good he accomplished in his first term!)
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To: durasell

LOL, very funny! And coming from me, that's a complement! : )


237 posted on 03/31/2006 4:32:45 PM PST by TAdams8591 (President Bush's second term is undoing all the good he accomplished in his first term!)
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To: durasell

No doubt I'm a lot smarter than you are.

Your ignorant post goes a long way towards proving that.


238 posted on 03/31/2006 4:33:31 PM PST by Supernatural (A 1,000 lies can be told, but the truth is still the truth.)
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Comment #239 Removed by Moderator

To: Englishgarden

Welcome to FR, Englishgarden.


240 posted on 03/31/2006 4:37:24 PM PST by tuliptree76
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