Posted on 03/17/2006 6:11:10 AM PST by jdm
LOL. There's dickless.
Haven't we all done that at one time or another?
But what about the shrinkage?
When interviewed about the willie-tossing incident, the officer said, " Hey! It was no big thang."
Detatchable Penis, by King Missile
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.
[background singing begins: "detachable penis" over and over]
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think it's gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
Dr. Bales: "Sir, I have bad news. We were fully prepared to re-attach your penis, but the officers told us that, since you threw it at them, they have to hold it as evidence."
LOL -- I remember that one! I remember the video (vaguely).
Note added in proof: He's no Willie Dixon.
I told them if it pops up to let me know.
Fik flik dik.
"His girl friend must have cut him off."
Was her name Lorena Kutchacockoff?
Next he takes out a dozen knives and throws them at the coppers...
What did he think they would do...cut off their own penises peni (what the heck is the plural anyway) peckers and throw them back at him...
A litle late to re-think that plan....
Maybe someone told him to go F' himself, so he tried.
Don't try this at home folks....this man was a professional
better headline:
Sick Prick Flicks Dick; Fik Nicked Quick
To quote Ghostbusters:
"Why yes, your honor, he IS a dickless wonder!"
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