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Microwaved Penis Turns Out To Be Fake
The Indy Channel ^ | February 27, 2006 | AP

Posted on 02/27/2006 5:31:39 AM PST by Abathar

PITTSBURGH -- It turns out the microwaved penis was a fake.

A convenience store clerk in the Pittsburgh area was freaked out when she thought she had put a severed penis in the store's microwave oven.

The clerk said a couple came into the store and asked her to heat up something for them. The clerk did and caught a glimpse of what she thought was a penis wrapped in paper towels.

McKeesport police Chief Joseph Pero said the woman who came into the store with the fake penis was actually trying to cheat on a job application drug test.

Prosthetic penises that contain drug-free urine are sold on the Internet. According to the woman, the couple stopped to warm the device in the microwave so the urine would pass the body temperature test.

Police plan to interview the woman Monday.


TOPICS: Miscellaneous; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: failedthedopetest; hatewhenthathappens; newsofthewierd; urinetroublenow
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To: day10
Congrats day10!

We bought/sold about a year and a half ago so I know how stressfull it can be! Just don't go and pull a teeny on us and be MIA for 6 months! ;o)

61 posted on 02/27/2006 7:22:10 AM PST by Millee (Don't make me get out my voodoo doll out!)
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To: Dashing Dasher
At first, this article had me sitting cross legged and watching my every word I directed at the wife(just in case). I am somewhat relieved it was a prosthetic instead of the real thing!!

Middle America as you put it, does indeed get me to raise a brow from time to time. However, seeing/hearing the things that happen in BFE, makes me a little more content that I am okay! lol...

62 posted on 02/27/2006 7:29:13 AM PST by sit-rep (If you acquire, hit it again to verify...)
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To: Mr. Brightside
"It didn't plump when you cooked it?"

They're supposed to puff up when they get hot.

63 posted on 02/27/2006 7:30:41 AM PST by Senator Goldwater
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To: Brett66
"This sounds like something Hillary Clinton could use as a wedge issue...."

Wouldn't that be the first time in awhile she's had any use for a.......?

-Eric

64 posted on 02/27/2006 7:31:54 AM PST by E Rocc
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To: sit-rep

That's why I used to watch Oprah.

It made me feel normal. Now, I live in SF and walking out the door makes me feel uber-normal.


;-)


65 posted on 02/27/2006 7:32:00 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (I prayed, 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it.)
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To: Dashing Dasher
No offense, but I hate SF. When I was there, I was hit on, "brushed", propositioned, all of the above every 5 minutes while in that town. Damn homos are bold out there. I was even with a hottie babe, and I still got brushed in bars. Heck, if that happened in these parts, the guy would get carried away by EMS. I did not do such a thing there because I was so tremendously outnumbered...

I feel for ya...get the hell outta there!

66 posted on 02/27/2006 7:37:33 AM PST by sit-rep (If you acquire, hit it again to verify...)
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To: The_Victor
Chemically induced stupidity

And the All-Natural variety.

67 posted on 02/27/2006 7:41:32 AM PST by Trailerpark Badass
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To: Trailerpark Badass
And the All-Natural variety.

They kinda run hand-in-hand. One generates the potential for the other, I guess.

68 posted on 02/27/2006 7:47:13 AM PST by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: sit-rep
When I was there, I was hit on, "brushed", propositioned, all of the above every 5 minutes while in that town.

You must be hot! LOL!!!!

Our fags are highly discriminating! ROFLMAO!

I took a client from Dallas to our local Transexual Bar for a little local entertainment the other night.

He'll never be the same.

.

69 posted on 02/27/2006 7:47:23 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (I prayed, 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it.)
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To: day10
An RB for the Minnesota Vikings, Onterrio Smith (maybe?), was busted with this same thing a while back. Also, trying to get my the drug test, IIRC.

My recollection is there was a 'skin tone' mismatch.

70 posted on 02/27/2006 7:49:32 AM PST by TC Rider (The United States Constitution © 1791. All Rights Reserved.)
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To: Dashing Dasher; Squantos; Eaker; patton
I took a client from Dallas to our local Transexual Bar for a little local entertainment the other night. He'll never be the same.

That wasn't Squantos was it!! lol...

71 posted on 02/27/2006 7:51:16 AM PST by sit-rep (If you acquire, hit it again to verify...)
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To: Conservative4Life

Don't whiz on the electric fence..


72 posted on 02/27/2006 7:58:04 AM PST by Trillian
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To: sit-rep; Squantos

No, but when Squantos gets into town, I'll know where to bring him!

;-)

DD


73 posted on 02/27/2006 8:03:12 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (I prayed, 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it.)
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To: Dashing Dasher; Squantos

Just lock up your lingerie draw!


74 posted on 02/27/2006 8:05:45 AM PST by sit-rep (If you acquire, hit it again to verify...)
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To: Dashing Dasher; Squantos

draw = drawer!


75 posted on 02/27/2006 8:07:07 AM PST by sit-rep (If you acquire, hit it again to verify...)
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To: sit-rep; Squantos
Just lock up your lingerie drawer!

Squantos likes to play dress us?

Who knew!?

76 posted on 02/27/2006 8:09:58 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (I prayed, 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

Dress us?

???


77 posted on 02/27/2006 8:16:32 AM PST by Eaker (My Wife Rocks! - Islam is the cancer, the US Military and Militia is the answer!)
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To: day10
Congrats day!

I know that God will heal you of the hurt. I pray that God will help you and the boys remember all the good stuff

78 posted on 02/27/2006 8:17:25 AM PST by John O (God Save America (Please))
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To: Eaker

He likes to dress us up?

Hey - I've been up since 4am - I'm still a little loopie.

This job my kill me yet.


zzzzzzz


79 posted on 02/27/2006 8:19:57 AM PST by Dashing Dasher (I prayed, 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it.)
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To: Charles Henrickson; martin_fierro

You gotta watch out for drug-crazed women who hang out at the 7-11...


80 posted on 02/27/2006 8:40:47 AM PST by mikrofon (Urinalysis, please)
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