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Top 7 Worst Christmas Songs
PA Times | 11/29/05 | Santa Pissant

Posted on 11/29/2005 11:30:51 AM PST by pissant

Last year, we ran through the list of best Christmas songs and carols. Lotsa of great memories. This year, it's time to list the WORST Christmas songs ever recorded. Some are because the version performed by the "artist" is horrid. Others because the song itself is weak and irritating. You be the judge.

Either way, I had a difficult time paring down the list. I left off "novelty" songs by the Chipmunks and Donald Duck, etc. They were intended to annoy, and thus were successful in their own right!

Top 7 Worst Christmas Songs Ever Recorded

7. Blue Christmas - by ANYONE OTHER THAN ELVIS PRESLEY -- Great song when sung by the King. Otherwise it is grating beyond belief.

6. 12 days of Christmas - various artists -- Why anyone listens to this silly thing is beyond me

5. Frosty the Snowman - various artists -- As annoying to me as the TV cartoon trotted out each year

4. Do They Know It's Christmas - Band Aid -- Another Bob Geldof save the starving biafrins effort. Truly unlistenable. With singing contributions from Boy George, Stink (Sting to some), and Wham, it is doomed to make many "worst" lists until it is completely forgotten about.

3. So This is Christmas - John Lennon -- As bad, if not worse, than his retarded Give Peace A Chance. A dirge for the ages.

2. Santa Clause is Coming to Town - Bruce Springsteen -- Truly pathetic, like 98% of his constipated sounding songs.

1. Santa Clause is Coming to Town - Jackson Five -- Truly the most irritating vocals I've ever heard, by a screeching young Michael Jackson. Nails on Chalkboards sound like Pavoratti by comparison


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Music/Entertainment
KEYWORDS: cheesy; christmasmusic
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To: ozarkgirl

Oooooh, that's one of my favorites.

"I don't want no crockadiles,
all I want is to see a hippo smile."

The one I can't stand is Little Drummer boy.

Right, Jean Krupa in a manger? Sure.


161 posted on 12/22/2006 12:20:03 PM PST by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: ShadowDancer

There is a whole slew of recent "soft rock" Christmas songs I've heard on the radio lately. And they ALL stink.


162 posted on 12/22/2006 12:39:39 PM PST by pissant
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To: Diana in Wisconsin

This is classic stuff!!


163 posted on 12/22/2006 12:40:16 PM PST by pissant
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To: ShadowDancer

I hear it comes with a very large belt buckle.

164 posted on 12/22/2006 12:40:18 PM PST by Cagey
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To: Malsua

Yikes! How did I miss that sentimental charmer? ;o)


165 posted on 12/22/2006 12:41:07 PM PST by pissant
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To: Oberon

Oh, the Austin Power's version of "bag"! Got it.


166 posted on 12/22/2006 12:41:50 PM PST by pissant
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To: Cagey

I understand it comes with a hearing aid and large print follow along lyrics.

167 posted on 12/22/2006 12:43:54 PM PST by ShadowDancer (No autopsy, no foul.)
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To: motormouth; All

Found another stinker to add to the list - Kelly Clarksdale. Great song, horrific vocals.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3rn8vOoiVek


168 posted on 12/22/2006 1:05:32 PM PST by pissant
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To: pissant
Here's SheDaisy:

Oh, the fire's burning slow
Now where's that mistletoe
Dear, it's getting kind of hot in here
I need a taste of Christmas cheer
I hope he gets here quick, I need a St. Nick fix
Oooo-eee, I just want him to be all wrapped up for me
Santa's never been this hard to resist
But Santa never used to look like this

He's traded in his reindeer for a limosine
He's wearing purple trousers instead of red and green
This Christmas I want something I never had
Cause Santa's got a brand new bag

Now, I got to got to find out how
To make him want to settle down
I've got a big fat kiss right at the top of my list
So we can build a little candy home
And have a few elves of our own
I want to sneak a peek at my surprise
And see tradition metamorphasize

He's given up the cookies and he's slimming down
He bought a little bungalow in Tinsel Town
This Christmas I want something I never had
Cause Santa's got a brand new bag

As he finds his Zen down on the kitchen floor
He lights a fat Cohiba from his humidor
This Christmas I want something I never had
Cause Santa's got a brand new bag

He's got a Richenbacher and he's bleached his hair
He's rockin to the rythm with a Latin flair
This Christmas I want something I've never had
Cause Santa's got a brand new bag

He's reading Socrates and cooking French cuisine
He's pictured on the front of money magazine
This Christmas I want something I've never had
Cause Santa's got a brand new
Santa's got, Santa's got a brand new bag

169 posted on 12/22/2006 1:05:42 PM PST by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: Oberon

Clever. I could get used to looking at these chicks!


170 posted on 12/22/2006 1:06:47 PM PST by pissant
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To: pissant

The one on the right wanted your number...I told her you weren't that kind of guy.


171 posted on 12/22/2006 1:08:12 PM PST by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: Oberon

You're right. I like the one on the left. ;o)


172 posted on 12/22/2006 1:09:29 PM PST by pissant
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To: pissant
The best thing about this country girl-group trio is that I have NEVER heard any of them express a political opinion of any kind. They just shut up and sing.

...unlike other, similar groups we might mention...

173 posted on 12/22/2006 1:11:16 PM PST by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: GLDNGUN

TSO is the group that does the music that the famous "Christmas Lights house" video uses.

Miller Light has a more prdestrian version using the same music.


174 posted on 12/22/2006 1:11:45 PM PST by MikeyGo (Happy Wookie Life Day)
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To: Oberon

"Nobody mentioned the endless ear-wrenching variations of The Little Drummer Boy, pa-rumpa-pum-pum!"

When I was a kid we had many "Living Voices" albums (which I cannot find now). Their version of LDB was truly great.


175 posted on 12/22/2006 1:13:21 PM PST by MikeyGo (Happy Wookie Life Day)
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To: somemoreequalthanothers

Who on earth thinks that's Burl Ives?!?!?!


176 posted on 12/22/2006 1:14:11 PM PST by linda_22003
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To: Oberon

I heard they were conservatives. I hope that is true. Beutiful women usually are.

have a blessed Christmas! Cheers!


177 posted on 12/22/2006 1:14:58 PM PST by pissant
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To: pissant

Santa Clause is Coming to Town - Bruce Springsteen

Have you ever see it done LIVE?

The Boss rocks


178 posted on 12/22/2006 1:18:13 PM PST by WhiteGuy (GOP Congress - 16,000 earmarks costing US $50 billion in 2006)
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To: Poser

Another best : "Joy to the World" Aaron Neville with the Blind Boys of Alabama.


179 posted on 12/22/2006 1:18:22 PM PST by linda_22003
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To: Oberon; pissant
The one on the right wanted your number...I told her you weren't that kind of guy.

You're right. I like the one on the left. ;o)

Picky, picky picky....Oh hell, then that I guess that just leaves me the one in the middle.

180 posted on 12/22/2006 1:31:20 PM PST by TruthWillWin
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